Venting away.

[Janus]

A good parent pays child support in a timely manner. No exceptions IMO.

In the real world, matters are rarely black or white.

Sometimes, it is useful in life to recognize people who are often incapable of independent rational thought. A good litmus test is to seek out the phrase "no exceptions". Almost without exception, it is safe to completely ignore anybody who makes a claim that a statement holds true without exception.

"No abortion, no exceptions"

"No tax is a good tax, no exceptions"

"Banks are evil, no exceptions"

If you cannot conceive of a situation where your reasoning fails, it is likely that you have not thoroughly thought through the subject.

 

[arabian]

MY OPINION is that children come first wrt child support.

I have no pity/sympathy for deadbeats whatsoever. Deadbeats can appeal to the maintenance enforcement agency and/or have their orders changed.

Yes I have indeed thought this out. A deadbeat is a deadbeat.

 

[Soiled]

A good parent pays child support in a timely manner. No exceptions IMO.

Guess I'm a poor parent then, having never paid child support once in nearly 4 years. The arrears might be closing in on $50 by now!

As stated before, nothings ever black and white like that statement implies. If I showed up each month at the Ex's door with a $1 cheque she would laugh. Well the first few months anyways, after which it would get old and doors would be closed in my face.

 

[niagaramom]

Inquiring Mind???

Inquiring Mind???

Soiled. Can we inquire as to why you have never paid child support?

 

[Soiled]

Sure. Court order is for Offset Child Support. If I remember the figures right, she is to pay me $1072 per month, and I am to pay her $1073 per month. Offset amount of $1 per month, payable by me, to her.

Neither of us wanted child support in the agreement as we are both of the agreement we should be self supporting and involved in each others lives/finances as little as possible post divorce. However lawyers/judge forced us to put it in. We've chosen to ignore it. Perhaps one day it will bite me in the ass and she will come for it retroactively, but at this amount I'm not exactly scared.

 

[Rioe]

Sure. Court order is for Offset Child Support. If I remember the figures right, she is to pay me $1072 per month, and I am to pay her $1073 per month. Offset amount of $1 per month, payable by me, to her.

Neither of us wanted child support in the agreement as we are both of the agreement we should be self supporting and involved in each others lives/finances as little as possible post divorce. However lawyers/judge forced us to put it in. We've chosen to ignore it. Perhaps one day it will bite me in the ass and she will come for it retroactively, but at this amount I'm not exactly scared.

And it's been like this for four years, without any annual adjustments? The amount may have changed, and be worth worrying about.

 

[Soiled]

If I'm not mistaken, based on other threads I've read, you generally can't request retroactive adjustmenrs prior to the date at which they actually ask for the adjustment... Hopefully I wrote that in a manner which makes sense.

That aside, the reality is that for the last year or two I think she now makes a small amount more than me, and would possibly be on the hook for 2 or 3 bucks a month to me.

To spice it up further, she's in the military and likely headed to Iraq for 6-8 months in May. If I really wanted to be a dick and play games I'm sure it's possible to go after her for full rate child support, with her at a significantly higher than normal income level, for that period. As stated in my last post however, we both believe in being financially independent of each other.

 

[rockscan]

Technically, if you both knew your income increased and you didnt advise then you acted in a blameworthy manner and retro could be awarded.

The bottom line is that cs is the right of the child and BOTH parents should be acting in a manner that benefits the children. Regardless of how you feel about being financially independent, the kids are still dependent on you both and should benefit from the changes in BOTH your incomes. Its a really loose argument and while it works for your situation, someone else reading that may say "well some anonymous poster on the internet said it was this way so thats how Im going to take it".

 

[Soiled]

Technichally having an increase in income and not knowing about it would be extremely rare, so your argument could be applied against just about all cases.

That people can argue the case for a dollar or two per month without being tongue in cheek, choking, or rolling their eyes, speaks volumes about why lawyers love family law and make so much money off of it.

This has gone off on a pretty far tangent though. If I have the time later I may post my background story and then people can poke holes in how I'm doing things there.

 

[niagaramom]

Nice Agreement!

Nice Agreement!

Soiled: Sounds like your situation is set. No use stirring the pot for a few dollars here and there. If everyone is happy, so be it. Wish my situation could be as simple!!

 

[Rioe]

To spice it up further, she's in the military and likely headed to Iraq for 6-8 months in May. If I really wanted to be a dick and play games I'm sure it's possible to go after her for full rate child support, with her at a significantly higher than normal income level, for that period. As stated in my last post however, we both believe in being financially independent of each other.

In that case, if you are going to have the child 100% time while she's posted, then yes, you SHOULD ask for child support during that time. It's not a matter of being financially independent or avoiding being a dick. It's a matter of it being her responsibility for supporting her child in proportion to her income. The child isn't going to stop eating, wearing clothes, using up electricity, etc, just because your ex isn't there to see it. If you don't get CS from your ex when you have the child, you are permitting your ex to be a deadbeat during that time. CS is for the child, and the child is not financially independent from her. You ARE going to incur additional expenses due to the child being with you 100%.

You could probably work it out that the CS is at her normal income rate, though.

 

[Janus]

To spice it up further, she's in the military and likely headed to Iraq for 6-8 months in May. If I really wanted to be a dick and play games I'm sure it's possible to go after her for full rate child support, with her at a significantly higher than normal income level, for that period. As stated in my last post however, we both believe in being financially independent of each other.

It is important to be a dick. Fathers need to stop being so reluctant to accept child support. A mother would absolutely collect the increased CS in this situation, so why should you be any different?

I wonder if Arabian would call this mother a deadbeat for not paying proper CS in this case? Are you only a deadbeat if the recipient parent asks for the money?

 

[Janus]

You could probably work it out that the CS is at her normal income rate, though.

Why would that be necessary? Is CS not paid on what you earn? If she is working harder, then that should be rewarded with higher CS payments.

It is an honour and a privilege to pay CS, and one that both genders should enjoy to its full potential.

 

[Soiled]

I've responded on an introduction thread I've created, this is way off topic now lol.