I do not believe that there is an age when a person first has a voice regarding their feelings about things that affect their person.
Huh? I do. It is called infancy, when they cry because that is how they communicate, to be fed, to be changed, to be burped, to be held and cuddled and loved...and this continues throughout their life.
If my child did not want to do math at home, I would say okay we can do something else right now, but when would you like to do our math studies? There is always a choice.
Children need structure and routine, especially at a time of familial upheaval. I agree that different children have different learning styles and preferences, but now more than ever, they also need boundaries.
What do you teach them when you say this is the only option, regardless of how you feel about it?
You teach them that you are the parent, discuss how they feel, but realise that you have a role to be the one(s) making those choices, not your 4 and 6 year olds! To do otherwise has been proven through numerous studies to be detrimental to a child's development.
I wouldn't have a problem with them attending public school if they were telling me they were enjoying it, or even progressing towards enjoying it.
After 2 weeks, your 4 yr old will not always enjoy it, nor will your 6 yr old. A neighbour of mine put her son on the school bus every day in tears for the almost the entire year through Kindergarten...but rather than allowing the child to choose, she parented responsibly. You think that was easy for her to do? Watch him in tears, each and every morning? This year, he is in grade 1, and he happily looks forward to the bus coming...
School is a transition for children. They are moving towards independance, and maturing, and it is normal for them to be apprehensive and worried and afraid...it is your role, as a parent, to work through those emotions with your child so they can understand why they are feeling, and can communicate it effectively.
I always speak supportively to them when we discuss school. I try to tell them it is fun, they will make new friends, it will get easier.
I try to tell them?
But I do not think I would be doing my children justice to hear them beg not to go and say well when you are old enough to have a voice, we can talk about it.
You would be doing your children justice if you encouraged it as a new learning environment, a new opportunity for them...not by confusing them by thinking things will change when they are older or that they have a voice in the matter...this is a parent issue, not a child issue.
Unfortunately my ex, who by the way is abusive and controlling in many facets of our relationship, knows that until the court process moves ahead he can do as he pleases without any communication to me. I should just let him? I am pursuing all the legal avenues possible, but it still takes time. Just don't want to mess the kids up until then. I guess that means just doing whatever he decides?
