suicide

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tugofwar

tugofwar

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Ok, so in the last few weeks there have been people posting notes about suicidal thoughts and this just bugs the heck out of me.
Let me tell you from my experience

, THAT IS THE MOST SELFISH THING YOU COULD DO !!!

And if you think you are better off, do you think your children are?
ABSOLUTELY NOT!!!! especially if you have concerns that the other parent is not fit to raise them. How could you think that the children are better off without you? No matter what you did or hurt them in anyway, children will love you unconditionally. You could be a hobo living in a paper box and that child will not judge you the way others will, they will say, hey that's my dad and I love him

Who is going to continue fighting for them when you are gone? Is the ex going to be able to financial support them without your support? How about their future, their future relationships, getting the proper education.... and all the other things if you go will affect the rest of their lives, physical, mentally and emotionally.

What if they blame themselves for it? Think maybe if they weren't born then daddy/mommy would still be alive?
Really, is this better? Do you want them to feel/think this?
If you feel this way ever, go get professional help, seriously.
 
well I am the one who encouraged this post so I should respond . Please understand Tug that I am sensitive and feel very strongly when it comes to my kids . Sometimes I do feel that way , but dont worry , I have a great family, and I will never let any woman get me to do that . I am sorry for using those words.
 
Dont worry but whenever I read anything like that, it triggers my experience and if I can save one person from doing it then my meaning of life is fulfilled.
It's one thing to think about it, come on most of us probably thought at some point or another. Maybe because we feel no one cares, no one will miss me, life would be better with me gone.. but it's another to say it out loud, write it down etc but in reality it is
SOOO WRONG!!! No matter what you did it will never be that bad for you to take your life over or your children not to love you.

Nothing is worth it, trust me. You could be a bad father, beat your kids, wife, assault someone but trust me you will never be unloved!

A child's love for a parent like I said is unconditional, just remember that and take it for all it's worth. Run with it! Just say to yourself, Im an amazing parent and love my kids but NOT to my own death.
There's no price on that feeling that you decide to LIVE for your children if no one else/
 
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No problems, don't worry I started off like you, ranting etc but soon realized this was not me, I was focusing all my energy on the ex and not focusing on what really mattered, my daughter.
I went to see a psychologist and like I said before, was the best decision I ever made!
It has helped me find my old true happy self again, that I don't need someone who doesn't love me to make me happy
I am able to stay calm and laugh inside everytime my ex gets angry and doesn't understand and laugh at the stupid comments he makes.
I do feel sorry because he's staying focused on himself and the past and the money instead of realizing the important thing here--- his daughter
I feel sorry for my daughter that he is not a part of her life because I was blessed with the most amazing gift, her! She is the happiest, caring, amazing little girl (and cute like heck I might add) and gives the best hugs and kisses!! because I took her out of a bad situation and gave her the attention she deserves.
 
broken heart

broken heart

sperated 3 months and my heart has been ripped out of me How and when do you start to see the hope in the future
I am a great looking guy but going out to bars late at nght to pick up at 45 is not my thing........and not what i want but i am havig tremedous difficiulties with this seperation She is manic depressive and i know she is sick but now i am questioning myself with everything and feel like i am going nuts She is throwing away a great life.

How do i get over thisssssssssssssssssss
 
Don't think about dating after just 3 months. A year would be a good time to start thinking about it.

Join a gym and work out regularly, take some general interest classes. Get around people again, figure who you are now that you are not part of a couple anymore. Stay out of bars for now.
 
i have joined a gym. I don't know how to figure out who I am and i am trying not to go out but i am really lonely most of my guy friends are married so when i go out at night its alone. Am i a loser or is it loser to go out alone?
 
The sad truth is that they are being selfish but they aren't capable of understanding that. It only makes them feel worse.
 
so then

so then

I am a strong man who can take on anything but this is really pushing me to places i have never been ........i have never hurt and felt so despair as i do now. i didn't cry much for a long while and now can't stop. 25 years gone wow i find myself driving places and then once there saying "what im i doing here..all cause i'm lost .........fuckkkkkk what a wusssssssss I read the link about suicide rates in Ontario ......fuckkkk again i am right there in the age range.....this is enough to drive anyone insane. i am getting help but it is an extreme fight
 
LoveIsRare said:
Telling suicidal people they are being selfish does absolutely nothing to help the situation.
Click to expand...

Do you know anyone that has committed suicide? I do. Someone extremely close to me. They suffered many years of depression manic actually. They didn't know how much damage was done when they left us this way.... thought no one cared but not from lack of us telling them or trying to help them.

So, if me saying it's a very selfish act and explaining why maybe will open their eyes and see why.

Did you think before you read this that it's selfish?
 
im not at suicide point.....i know and understand its selfish... im like on a rollercoaster ride i was mostly saying i can understand how going through this can lead to it. There reasoning at the time was flawed but thats the feeling i get ....... i am certainly fighting ...very rarely lose a fight but this will be the hardest thing i will have ever done and it has brought to places that i have never been
 
tugofwar said:
Do you know anyone that has committed suicide? I do. Someone extremely close to me. They suffered many years of depression manic actually. They didn't know how much damage was done when they left us this way.... thought no one cared but not from lack of us telling them or trying to help them.

So, if me saying it's a very selfish act and explaining why maybe will open their eyes and see why.

Did you think before you read this that it's selfish?
Click to expand...
One of my family members committed suicide. You're fooling yourself if you think putting down a depressed person will "open their eyes."

It sounds to me like your angry at someone and this is a way to release that anger. While I appreciate your feelings, I don't think it's necessarily the best way to deal with people who are suicidal.
 
Im not putting them down. Im just stating the truth. A suicidal person is not thinking if I leave this way how is it going to affect everyone that loves me. Just trying to get them to think about it. I know people suffer depression but there are different forms of it.
There's going thru a difficult time as most of us on here are going thru then there's the depressed people who have a chemical imbalance which no matter what you do or take helps the depression and pretty much lived with it their whole life and suffer.
People on here are here for help. I was extremely down and hit a low time in my life too when things ended. BUT i have a daughter who needs me as her mother. She doesn't have much of a father right now. So, if I was to leave this world, how much better off do you think she would be? Yes it would end my suffering but what about hers?
That's all Im trying to do is get people to think differently. To think or have a reason to live. I might not ever be in love with someone again. U never know. But I have a daughter who needs me more than anything else and I will live for her
 
I know alot about depression. Im talking in text with this forum. Most of us are going thru a difficult time and yes maybe some people are depressed.
Maybe some of us are on medications, have suffered all our lives, but for some of us it's a temporary state we are in right now as we don't see why we should live any longer.
And then some of us snap out of it, see there's life after this mess. There's hope and a future. We think about things we are going to look forward to doing. Mine is enjoying the spring and summer with my little one and there's no price on the amount of warmth that brings me!
 
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