STBX quit her job do i have to

That was my thought on life I bought things when I was young Im 36. My goal was to be semi retired by forty five. spend time with the kids travel enjoy life. the kids are young its a perfect time to work save money. My dreams are washed away. I really cant afford to go back to school being that she gets half of every thing. so I quess Im stuck. They always say what did you sacrifice. mine was time away from the famiy, friends, being stuck looking at a driling rig for the rest of my life its sad knowing we had future goals that were so close to accomplishing.
 
Federal Court Affirms Employer's Obligation to Accommodate Childcare Needs :: Hicks Morley ::


Talk to this guy https://www.linkedin.com/pub/darryl-kolewaski/83/961/13

That was my thought on life I bought things when I was young Im 36. My goal was to be semi retired by forty five. spend time with the kids travel enjoy life. the kids are young its a perfect time to work save money. My dreams are washed away. I really cant afford to go back to school being that she gets half of every thing. so I quess Im stuck. They always say what did you sacrifice. mine was time away from the famiy, friends, being stuck looking at a driling rig for the rest of my life its sad knowing we had future goals that were so close to accomplishing.
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At least you aren't old - you see guys guy in LONG TERM marriage who are now basically indentured servants.

The custody thing is pivotal - financially and lifestyle wise it changes everything.
 
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I understand it would be difficult to leave the big money but there are options. Many people go from being a rig pig to setting up their own business in a related business. Nisku Industrial or Atcheson Industrial Parks are proof of enterprising people. Many businesses are oilfield-related and would employ someone with your knowledge. You have to start somewhere. Life on the rigs is lonely and hard. No one would fault you for working for a bit less money. You pay huge taxes anyhow. Maybe talk to a financial advisor next time you're in town and have him/her crunch some numbers for you. The saying "you're richer than you think" may very well apply to you.
 
Well, it doesn't look like you're going to be able to retire when you're 45 - but that just puts you in the same boat as everybody else. There's no reason you should have to be on the rigs for the rest of your life. No one can expect you to keep earning $300K per year if it's ruining the quality of your life. You're not going to be unemployed, you'll just be employed at a lower salary, like 95% of the population. Arabian mentioned Leduc and Nisku; there's also the new developments going on around Ft Saskatchewan which need the same skills as work up in the oil fields.

And if I may say so, it sounds like you're not getting great advice from your lawyer. It sounds like she's giving you numbers for SS and CS which she's just pulling out of the air, and now she's telling you you have to have a damn good reason to quit your job - which is just not true. You can't just quit and sit around contributing nothing to your children, but you can certainly take work which is more flexible, without being "intentionally underemployed".
 
Links17 said:
Federal Court Affirms Employer's Obligation to Accommodate Childcare Needs :: Hicks Morley ::
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The corporations will just say get a full time nanny even if you are primary care and control, they are available, unions will protect their sacred seniority rights, especially do not want you to set a precedent! The union and company will work together to wiggle their way out of your situation, maybe get you to sign off your rights in return for very short term accommodation, or offer accommodation that is unreasonable. Then if you have to quit, its along process of grievance, arbitration, human rights complaint wait...process...courts...hopefully you didn't already sign away your rights to grieve or complain for short term accommodation, also company argues they tried to accommodate you or they did accommodate you...
You have no choice but to abide by the corporations rules, or have a long fight ahead of you...but if you do lose your job...the fight will be worth it if you get back pay, and your job back as long as it is not too stressful for the family.
If you could get a job quietly on the side while fighting the company that works with your childcare schedule all the better.
 
undersc0re said:
The corporations will just say get a full time nanny even if you are primary care and control, they are available, unions will protect their sacred seniority rights, especially do not want you to set a precedent! The union and company will work together to wiggle their way out of your situation, maybe get you to sign off your rights in return for very short term accommodation, or offer accommodation that is unreasonable. Then if you have to quit, its along process of grievance, arbitration, human rights complaint wait...process...courts...hopefully you didn't already sign away your rights to grieve or complain for short term accommodation, also company argues they tried to accommodate you or they did accommodate you...
You have no choice but to abide by the corporations rules, or have a long fight ahead of you...but if you do lose your job...the fight will be worth it if you get back pay, and your job back as long as it is not too stressful for the family.
If you could get a job quietly on the side while fighting the company that works with your childcare schedule all the better.
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Actually, the full time nanny is a pretty good idea, and certainly affordable on 300k salary. And it would be a section 7 expense, as it is necessary childcare for you to maintain 50-50 access while you work, due to the nature of your two-weeks-on-two-weeks-off job. Then your ex would have to balance getting less CS if you change your job to having to pay a lot more section 7 expenses but get higher CS.

The way I think about it is, what would you do to look after the kids if your ex was tragically killed instead of you guys separating? Would you change jobs, or would you hire a nanny for those two weeks you had to be away?
 
Rioe said:
Actually, the full time nanny is a pretty good idea, and certainly affordable on 300k salary. And it would be a section 7 expense, as it is necessary childcare for you to maintain 50-50 access while you work, due to the nature of your two-weeks-on-two-weeks-off job. Then your ex would have to balance getting less CS if you change your job to having to pay a lot more section 7 expenses but get higher CS.

The way I think about it is, what would you do to look after the kids if your ex was tragically killed instead of you guys separating? Would you change jobs, or would you hire a nanny for those two weeks you had to be away?
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You could even make this work for you, claim nanny expenses(will not work for all family members), maybe even employ a friend or family member to do it, see your kids more often, less stressful. That nanny could help out in picking up and dropping off the kids for visitation etc....You could also ask for a little accommodation to support your situation such as maybe just preferred vacation time or a couple of 2 week LOA's etc.
 
the nanny thing flies in the face of maximum contact principle.

I've read many judgement where parents who have custody but the children are being cared a lot of the time by others have the custody altered.

For example people who work afternoon shifts, can't have custody because they don't actually see their kids...

You can try but if you win on this point it basically means kids are just pawn pieces to control where support payments go...
 
Why is it that she is being so... Hard on this divorce thing. I have very little time with kids weekends. Im home for two weeks at a time. She wants to talk VIA email only. she canceled all voicemail accounts. She shuts the ringer off on the house phone she blocked my number. no texts. She says call at seven if you want to talk to kids I call and of course no answer. She know that we cant afford to pay CS and rent another place. Im driving all over alberta to to stay at friends places ( couches ). Im spending a foutune on gas. Is she just trying to show the courts real hard that we cant comunicate so she gets the kids all the time. Im so feed up with this. I feel like just giving her the kids giving her everything. just be a check book dad and the hell with it. then I know I dont have to deal with her just pay and thats its.
 
She wants you to disappear and pay her tonnes of support and she will do everything she thinks necessary to do it. Its also control and detaching u from the kids....
 
Correct she wants you to pay, whether it's emotional or financially. Oh you'll pay. :) I have a few friends in the oilfields too and this as you know is common. Mom is mad you're always away, lose touch or met someone else. She a single parent, you guys don't communicate anymore etc..

Then talks to some friends and realizes she can still get all the money and support and not have to see your ass every two weeks. Game over

Here's one similar to yours...in this case, mom went after for more spousal support and got it from 3K to 9K per month

newman vs newman

Mom gets note from doctor that she should only work part time because of the stress of divorce...dad has to continue working 300+ days a year.

Do not expect the courts to do what's fair so prepare yourself. It's not a court of Justice, it's a court of law.



childrenand happy said:
Why is it that she is being so... Hard on this divorce thing. I have very little time with kids weekends. Im home for two weeks at a time. She wants to talk VIA email only. she canceled all voicemail accounts. She shuts the ringer off on the house phone she blocked my number. no texts. She says call at seven if you want to talk to kids I call and of course no answer. She know that we cant afford to pay CS and rent another place. Im driving all over alberta to to stay at friends places ( couches ). Im spending a foutune on gas. Is she just trying to show the courts real hard that we cant comunicate so she gets the kids all the time. Im so feed up with this. I feel like just giving her the kids giving her everything. just be a check book dad and the hell with it. then I know I dont have to deal with her just pay and thats its.
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