STBX quit her job do i have to

I love divorce. Any comment made can bent into whatever one wants to believe.
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I'm female and if I was gone for 2 weeks working my butt off earning a living while my spouse was at home, I'd expect affection and sex when I got home. In fact, I'd be pretty ticked off if I didn't get it.

Go figure.

I've always worked full-time and taken care of kids and cleaned the house. The SAHM mom job with only 2 kids doesn't seem like that big of a deal to me. I couldn't live without affection or sex...there's no way I'd put up with that. I can absolutely understand wanting to divorce in that situation.

To each their own, I guess.

To tell you the truth, I'd never have a SAH spouse anyway. I would never support another adult...I'd expect them to be self-sufficient.
 
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childrenand happy said:
There is a EX boyfriend that visited our house our entire marriage. so yes thats why I said what I said our first child we tried for a year before concieving, And the last I honestly dont remeber doing the deed. that why I said what I did. It's not really important at this stage of the game.
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geesh not everyone conceives right away. Plus with your time away it was kinda hit and miss to even get pregnant.

Sometimes people can be friends with exs. I have been friends with one for over 25 years. My boyfriends over the years have met him and in fact he and my STBX use to watch hockey together.
 
Welcome to Alberta. The oilpatch is great for making tons of money for the unattached young guy but not for raising a family, well it starts off good but then wife gets disgruntled and mad that husband is away half the time and divorce capital as the other person said it.

What do you think are the reasons why Albert is the divorce capital?

1. Is it because if its the wife that wants to leave, she be financially "independent" based upon SS / CS.
2. The life of the oilpatch, 2 weeks on 2 weeks off.
 
FirstTimer said:
Welcome to Alberta. The oilpatch is great for making tons of money for the unattached young guy but not for raising a family, well it starts off good but then wife gets disgruntled and mad that husband is away half the time and divorce capital as the other person said it.

What do you think are the reasons why Albert is the divorce capital?

1. Is it because if its the wife that wants to leave, she be financially "independent" based upon SS / CS.
2. The life of the oilpatch, 2 weeks on 2 weeks off.
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...plus a whole lot of married men messing around up in the 'patch while the wife is back in the city. Note that I am not saying this is the case with the OP. A couple of years ago I had a project at work which involved tracking sexually transmitted infections in Canada, and Ft Mac is off the charts in terms of how fast infections spread. The whole oilpatch situation is bad news for both husbands and wives. And real estate is unaffordable, so men can't buy a house and bring their families up - they end up doing 10 or 14 day rotations, with a lot of temptation - drugs, sex, you name it.
 
2 weeks on 2 weeks off is a pussy schedule and not an excuse for broken marriage IMO. There are many communities to live in besides Ft. McMurray. Worst case scenerio is the 5 hr drive to Edmonton. Regular air and bus service.

Fort McMurray is a city. Most people working on rigs stay in camp which is hours out of Ft. McMurray. Camp is like a town unto itself. Much cheaper than trying to rent a place in Ft. McMurray plus it often is an employer/employee share plan. Check out Syncrude website for info on just one employer in the area.

I believe that nursing/retirements homes have the highest rates of STDs do they not?

Anytime you get people of opposite sex in a living situation which is boring you will have 'musical bed syndrome.' Something for me to look forward to someday I guess.
 
So just got off the phone with the lawyer. 3171 a month for CS and for SS she gets 4971. oh lets not forget section 7 lets say 1000 for a grand total of 9142 a month did she just win the lotterry or what
 
Did your lawyer say how he came up with those figures? They sound way too high to me. If your income is $175K and hers is $75K, and you've got one child, and you're sharing residency 50/50, there's no way your portion comes out to $3K per month. I punched the numbers into Child Support Table Look-up, and got $1 528 per month using your income alone, in the assumption that the child is with your ex full-time.

If you offset this amount by your ex's income, as you should do in situations where you both have equal residences with the child, the amount you pay would be even less. My bf has shared parenting of two kids, he makes around $125K, his ex makes around $50K, and his CS payments are less than $1.5K. Use the federal child support calculator (linked in the paragraph above), put in the appropriate numbers, and see what you come up with.

Same with SS - where did this number come from? SS is more complex than CS because there's no easy calculator which settles the issue, but $5K per month for a short-to-medium-term marriage to someone who is young and employable sounds way out of line to me. Go back to your lawyer, insist in knowing where these numbers come from, and if you don't agree with the reasoning, come up with your own counter-offer.
 
They say she had gotten paid didvidened from the company and she is taking her name off the company. our t5's combined together is 193. our company at the end of expenses is 230 they want to base it off of the company. I dont have 50/50 I well get every other weekend. We have two kids a two year old and a 7 year old. They arent using the wifes income due to it was dividends. She is 43.
 
1 - What about duration?
2 - SS is tax deductible
3 - CS is for life

Yes, she did just win the lottery - it'll get better she'll probably move wherever she wants and do whatever she wants with child support and/or spousal support.

You can hope she'll spend it on the kids but the reality is that she'll live off CS for the next 20 or so years. Put a bit of it aside like a pension plan and then live off that 65+...

Marriage is temporary, divorce is forever!
 
One would fairly presume the calculation of cs and ss for the household would be based off of the company statements. So your numbers don't lie.
You won't obtain 50/50 care of your children if you continue to prioritize your career. Pick the one path on which you wish to focus. And here's a hint - you are already 7 years minimum behind the 8-ball on parenting. You have some catching up to do.
 
The most important thing is that there is actually a term with very good wording.

You'll have to disclose for CS anyways so that's meaningless.

For SS, you need to also make sure it takes into consideration if you lose you job or whatever.
 
It is not unusual for someone in your situation to request consideration for high access costs (travel, accommodation).

Something else to consider is a gradually reducing scale of SS. Judges seem to like this as it gives the recipient time to adjust to decreased support income.
 
Sorry, I misunderstood your situation. From your first post, I thought you had one kid and were seeking a 50/50 arrangement. If your ex has primary residence with the kids, CS is just based on your income.

Even so, when I played around with the federal support calculator with different incomes for you (not sure how dividends translate into guideline income), I was coming up with around $600 per month less than what your lawyer says you'll be paying. That's a significant difference. Ask your lawyer what he or she was using for your guideline income.

As for SS - a gradual reduction in SS sounds reasonable in this situation. 43 isn't that old, your ex has plenty of income-earning years ahead of her. And it sounds like she has some skills, if she has been employed for part of your marriage. Perhaps you could suggest starting out with the spousal amount your lawyer suggested (still not clear where those numbers are coming from) and reducing it gradually over the next four years until the youngest is in school full-time.

The important thing is that you don't have to just accept the numbers you're given, you can negotiate or counter-offer. From your description, it sounds like your ex would be awarded some spousal support for her role taking care of home and kids while you were up north, but that doesn't mean she gets whatever figure she wants.

And I want to echo an earlier poster - think seriously about how you can get off the 14-on/14-off treadmill and stay closer to your kids. I don't buy the argument that there is no alternative - not with the huge demand for trades and skilled labour in Alberta. You may end up making a little less money (and paying less CS), but you will be able to be part of your children's lives. From the way things are going, you're in danger of turning into a chequebook dad who loses his relationship with the kids. This too is very common in Alberta.

At the end of the day, do you want to be able to say "I was a family man and devoted father", or do you want to be able to say "I helped Shell/Suncor/whoever drag a lot more barrels of oil out of the ground"?
 
OF course I would quit this job. I told my lawyer I wanted to quit. She says you need a dam good reason to quit. AND of course I use the line that every other person uses " FOR THE BEST INTREST IN THE CHILD" thats all i hear. of course I'd be going from 330 a year to 60000 a year but atleast i'd beable to see my kids. I worked my whole life away from home what about me why do i need to continue to work away from home. I want to be home every night " looking after the kids" heaven for bid thats the hardest job in the world.


I tentively lined up an interview in the city can I take the job or would it do harm by doing this. Probably be around 60k a year
 
childrenand happy said:
OF course I would quit this job. I told my lawyer I wanted to quit. She says you need a dam good reason to quit. AND of course I use the line that every other person uses " FOR THE BEST INTREST IN THE CHILD" thats all i hear. of course I'd be going from 330 a year to 60000 a year but atleast i'd beable to see my kids. I worked my whole life away from home what about me why do i need to continue to work away from home. I want to be home every night " looking after the kids" heaven for bid thats the hardest job in the world.


I tentively lined up an interview in the city can I take the job or would it do harm by doing this. Probably be around 60k a year
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your stbxs argument would be that its too much of a drastic change in income (intentionally underemployed). She can also say if you wanted to be home every night, then why didn't you do it before? She will argue that you are doing it to cut down on the amount of CS .
 
You can do whatever job you want but you very well may be imputed income. If the work you currently do would be considered a "young man's" job then that would be taken into consideration. Judge's are very aware of someone who quits a job to lower their support payment, all the while working for cash on the side.

You'd probably have more success with a career change if you were enrolled in an upgrading course and could present a concise plan of how you are going to make a better life for yourself and your children.

Don't even think of trying the physical/illness route. IF you do you will be sent on a 4 year-long journey of going to specialists all the while being imputed with your current income.
 
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