self-repped ex

K

Kkc

New member
hi,

I just want some perspective on when the other side is self-repped and saying they "are looking" for a lawyer.

basically her 3rd lawyer announced retirement in september, and the case was not passed on within the firm, nor did she start looking then
bailed on mediation session the day before and paralyzed the case
she has 3 outstanding court orders against her:
1. has to file 2021 and 2022 taxes and provide them to me
2. cost award from previous motion
3. in summer I had to go to court to get disclosure. I won and it was ordered to be produced in a month, she refuses to comply..it is easy stuff, bank records, real estate transactions, would take an hour tops to get all the info

also refuses to update a knowingly false financial statement. Every single court order has been violated to date.

The ex is obviously self-entitled and does not think the rules apply to her. It makes it impossible for me to move this on to finality.
So we have a motion next Friday to seek non-compliance and enforcement of 1-3.

So 1 of 2 things will happen. A lawyer will magically show up the day before and stall things. Or 2, she will cry ignorance as she self reps.

Given the above and the repeated pattern of behavior, what can I expect if she asks for an adjournment. The money for the cost award is available and sitting in the trust from sale of our house and she owes me a massive EP. The orders are black and white, I am not sure what a lawyer showing up last minute can say to defend her especially since she has known we were seeking a non-compliance order related to taxes and disclosure (meaning if she produced everything ahead of next week, she could say she is clean)

Again...i appreciate the sentiment of trying to settle this and cost of lawyers..but I really am trying to reason with someone who cannot be reasoned with. We tried booking a settlement conference but she and her lawyer lied to the judge about the circumstances of the case..im serious
 
"So 1 of 2 things will happen. A lawyer will magically show up the day before and stall things. Or 2, she will cry ignorance as she self reps."

How many times has she done either of those 2 things before?
 
its an either or
she has never self-repped

but she has fired a lawyer 1 week before questioning and stalled things out

I guess there are a few scenarios

1. she self reps and tries to ask for an adjournment and cries she doesnt have a lawyer
2. a 4th declares themselves at the 11th hour and asks to negotiate
3. a 4th lawyer declares themselves at 11th hour and asks to adjourn the motion because they need time
4. she no shows and summary judgment

I actually want # 2 to happen.

I just want to know if someone has been in situation 1 or 3 and if the adjournment was granted.
Keep in mind, this motion is straightforward...there is an order to file taxes, she did not do it, there is an order to provide disclosure, she did not do it. This is also such a waste of judicial resources

The smartest thing for her upon being served was to start providing disclosure and get taxes filed...much easier to avoid consequences if she is late than never
 
Number 3: Yes, and it was adjourned.
Number 1: Yes, but the judge said "no, I am not letting you stall this any further."

Completely different situation than yours.
 
Well she got a lawyer..not a very good one who only dabbles into family law.
She provided the disclosure..only after I brought the motion
this guy has no clue what he has just walked into
 
Kkc said:
Well she got a lawyer..not a very good one who only dabbles into family law.
She provided the disclosure..only after I brought the motion
this guy has no clue what he has just walked into
Click to expand...

This may be good for you as the lawyer may simply want to comply and follow the rules and code
 
Kkc said:
Well she got a lawyer..not a very good one who only dabbles into family law.
She provided the disclosure..only after I brought the motion
this guy has no clue what he has just walked into
Click to expand...

How was the disclosure, did she provide everything?
 
She had a few ommissions
she claims to have never had an interest in a property but I have a title search with her name on it
she claims she does not have details of a separate legal file, she can simply get that

she lied about the camera again

but she basically paints a picture that the mediator told her she needed a lawyer and at that point I terminated mediation and took her to court

the email chain shows the opposite

she included in her affidavit a draft sep agreement the mediator wrote saying I wrote it even though the mediation agreement states it cannot be used in a proceeding..so it will be struck from the record
 
So she ended up getting a personal injury lawyer

so it got narrowed down to disclosure on 5 issues

the judge first said, I think you guys should question
y Lawyer outdueled the judge on the argument that the affidavit serves as questioning, it was unreal

she was ordered to answer several financial questions
her lawyer was ordered to write letters to companies for information
rhe best was this judge looked at her statements and basically called her a liar

It should set me up to finally make an offer
if she does not take it, unfortunately a trial
her thoughts are she should get 20 years of support when we only together 5

its become apparent her behavior is enabled by her parents who likely are expensing the legal bills through the business
she has 0 dollars and close to bankruptcy..she likely will have to get securities
 
Dodge CS or spousal by not paying and FRO goes after them.
Dodge it by brazenly lying and stalling in court and there is virtually no recourse that doesn’t involve punishing the victim.

Family Court needs a version of a paupers jail to deal with certain situations.
 
If there was any way to reform would be cases go to case management way earlier
the problem is this case is not complicated at all
the ex parents are forcing all the expense. If she was paying the lawyers herself she would think twice about misbehaving
unforTunately for her parents, she may have to ask them for securities
 
Kkc said:
her lawyer was ordered to write letters to companies for information
Click to expand...

Why would a lawyer write letters to companies and why would anyone respond to it?

There's no securities play here. Like you said, if no agreement- you're heading to trial.

Your settlement conference judge is almost certainly the case management judge. Get there earlier by going to court, not mediation and delays.
 
1. Request to credit card companies for statements. She claims she can’t access them bc they are in collections
2. She and her mom used a cloud based camera to spy on me in my own hosue for 3 months. We confronted with evidence and she made up a story that the judge essentially called her a liar. I agree writing that company won’t yield anything and the play there is make her mom a third party witness with a massive lawsuit

securities will be because she has no way to pay costs and you cannot expect me being reasonable to litigate against a multimillion dollar company who will pay to campaign against me.

i dont think it will go to a trial bc her current lawyer seems like he wants out so fast. He’s a personal injury lawyer. No one would take her case. His firm does work for that company..so likely why he took it

he was entirely lost at the motion…his own financial expert said to me, I don’t know why he asked me to look at the books
 
Perhaps my case is more complex than yours

if her credit card bills are paid by someone else, it is imputed income, it looks like right now I have overpaid support by 80k..it works both ways
it is her who is resisting everything
i should not have had to wait a year to get her bank records..but when she doesn’t have to cooperate and there are no means to hold accountable, not much in way of choice

im going to be reasonable but I’m not going to leave 200k on the table.
 
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