Renovations in matrimonial home

T

trueblue22

New member
My ex plans to go to court to force me out of the matrimonial home so he can do upgrades to it to extract maximum value out of it (and to force me out) when he sells. Since he has already told me he's going to fight me in court for the post separation increase of the value of the matrimonial home I don't want him to renovate it. I would rather it sell in its current condition so he gets less money. I suspect he might try to move back in when I'm out since the house is in his name. Is there any way I can stop this?
 
No there isn’t. And fighting him will make you lose more money. If you are ordered out or he buys you out then you can’t win.

The only thing you can do is fight to have it sold and if he has the legal ground to stop that from happening, you are out of luck.
 
rockscan said:
No there isn�t. And fighting him will make you lose more money. If you are ordered out or he buys you out then you can�t win.

The only thing you can do is fight to have it sold and if he has the legal ground to stop that from happening, you are out of luck.
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Why would he be allowed to buy me out? He can't force me to sell to him. He needs to compete on the open market as far as I understand.
 
You are a squatter. You have limited rights until you are forced out.

The house will be appraised as of the valuation date and you'll receive half the equity at that time. You're owed a specific amount which has nothing to do with what the house sells for now. It's not your property and you have no say over any renovations or sale price.
 
StillPaying said:
You are a squatter. You have limited rights until you are forced out.

The house will be appraised as of the valuation date and you'll receive half the equity at that time. You're owed a specific amount which has nothing to do with what the house sells for now. It's not your property and you have no say over any renovations or sale price.
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Why would I be considered a squatter? I contributed about 10% of the total down payment of this home while my ex husband contributed 90%.. It's still the matrimonial home. By letting me stay here my ex by default recognized my right to the ownership of the property.
 
trueblue22 said:
Why would I be considered a squatter? I contributed about 10% of the total down payment of this home while my ex husband contributed 90%.. It's still the matrimonial home. By letting me stay here my ex by default recognized my right to the ownership of the property.
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No he didn’t. He was putting his case together and probably hoped you would get your shit together. Four years later and you still think he owes you.

10% is nothing and his name is on the title. Now you are trying to fight a losing battle. He owns the home. If you can’t buy him out then you aren’t in a position to demand anything. Plus if it is ordered sold, he could have someone else he knows buy it with his money. Or he could simply have you ordered out. Which is probably what he will do.

So much for “best interest of the children”. This argument demonstrates FULLY that you are only out for yourself and screwing your ex.
 
rockscan said:
No he didn�t. He was putting his case together and probably hoped you would get your shit together. Four years later and you still think he owes you.

10% is nothing and his name is on the title. Now you are trying to fight a losing battle. He owns the home. If you can�t buy him out then you aren�t in a position to demand anything. Plus if it is ordered sold, he could have someone else he knows buy it with his money. Or he could simply have you ordered out. Which is probably what he will do.

So much for �best interest of the children�. This argument demonstrates FULLY that you are only out for yourself and screwing your ex.
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I just want him to be fair to me. It's not fair if I need to live and rent a 1 bedroom condo while he gets to live in a 3 million dollar house. The kids will have drastic different standard of living during each of our parenting time.
 
trueblue22 said:
I just want him to be fair to me. It's not fair if I need to live and rent a 1 bedroom condo while he gets to live in a 3 million dollar house. The kids will have drastic different standard of living during each of our parenting time.
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Why does he have to be fair? Hes been fair the last four years and you have used him. He worked hard and built his career. You quit your job and started your own business and paid your boyfriend a salary. Your ex is not responsible for your stupid decisions.

Make him a reasonable offer and end this ridiculous battle that is all about your jealousy over what he has!
 
rockscan said:
Why does he have to be fair? Hes been fair the last four years and you have used him. He worked hard and built his career. You quit your job and started your own business and paid your boyfriend a salary. Your ex is not responsible for your stupid decisions.

Make him a reasonable offer and end this ridiculous battle that is all about your jealousy over what he has!
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I am an entrepreneur at heart. Now that restrictions have been loosened my business should be making money soon. The business grants and loans helped keep me afloat and to pay myself and my bf a salary.

We used to have a good high end standard of living. It's only fair maintains that standard so my kids and I are not living paycheque to paycheque. I need 20 to 25k a month and I'll settle. He is offering me 5k with 50% section 7 expenses split 50/50. The kids section 7 expenses are close to 200k a year. I would be in a deficit and go bankrupt.
 
trueblue22 said:
It's not fair if I need to live and rent a 1 bedroom condo while he gets to live in a 3 million dollar house.
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He makes an insane amount of money, you do not. Your relationship with a man who makes $500k per year (if not more) has ended, and you now have a relationship with someone who does not make even close to that amount of money.

Questions for you TrueBlue:
1- What would happen if you won LottoMax tomorrow?
2- What would happen if your business was suddenly thriving and making $5,000,000 annually?
3- What would happen if you left your new boyfriend for a billionaire?

If any of those would happen, you would be singing a different tune. The issue with you is that you keep comparing yourself to your ex. Stop it. His reality is different than yours. He will have a nice house regardless of what you want or think. The fact that you have to rent is not unheard of. LOTS of people who separate and divorce go from owning a home to renting a home. TONS of people who separate or divorce go bankrupt even. You will need to learn to cope with your new situation. You keep pointing at your ex while refusing to look in the mirror. You may wish to speak to a therapist on adapting to your new life reality.

FYI- most people on this forum focus on their kids and not what they feel they should be owed or what they are losing/lost financially. You have your kids half the time. Be happy!
 
trueblue22 said:
I am an entrepreneur at heart. Now that restrictions have been loosened my business should be making money soon. The business grants and loans helped keep me afloat and to pay myself and my bf a salary.
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Ah yes so you depended on the Canadian taxpayer AND your ex to fund your lifestyle. Glad you spent someone else’s money last year.

We used to have a good high end standard of living. It's only fair maintains that standard so my kids and I are not living paycheque to paycheque. I need 20 to 25k a month and I'll settle. He is offering me 5k with 50% section 7 expenses split 50/50. The kids section 7 expenses are close to 200k a year. I would be in a deficit and go bankrupt.
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USE TO HAVE are the key words there. You are now getting divorced which means you will not have the same standard of living and things WILL change. Your kids won’t be living paycheque to paycheque, YOU will. And that is not your ex’s fault. As stated ad nauseam to you, your ex is not responsible for you anymore. He is responsible for the kids expenses in an offset situation. You are responsible for the other share. If your business is not doing well enough on its own then you need to get a new job. Thousands of dads out there HAVE to work to pay support and HAVE TO PAY according to their income. How is that different for you? Your kids are your responsibility too and if you can’t afford their lifestyle then you need to make some hard decisions about what they participate in annually.

You are just demonstrating your spoiled, self entitled attitude and also how you will lose everything including what is actually “fair” in your situation.
 
rockscan said:
You are just demonstrating your spoiled, self entitled attitude and also how you will lose everything including what is actually �fair� in your situation.
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I am beginning to think that TrueBlue's situation is not real and its just somebody posting ridiculous posts for a ruse.

If this not a ruse, TrueBlue's lawyer clearly sees free money and is not advising his/her client.

TrueBlue: Have you filed and submitted your Financial Statement yet? If not, what are you waiting for? You are not the first person to separate where a house is involved. You cannot afford to buy out your ex, and your ex wants to renovate and sell the house. Your ex is moving forward. Wants to move forward with his life. A judge will have a field day with you and you will be liable for your ex's costs.
 
trueblue22 said:
I need 20 to 25k a month and I'll settle.
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No you don't. You are separated and have a boyfriend to help contribute to your livelihood, between the 2 of your salaries, you should be able to manage putting a roof over your heads, food on the table, clothes on your backs, and other miscellaneous expenditures within your budget. Note: Within the budget of your new reality, not former life with rich husband. You qualify for offset CS and a period of SS based on the duration of your marriage.

You do not need $25,000 per month. You would like it, but don't need it.

trueblue22 said:
He is offering me 5k
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99% of people would bend over backwards for $5,000 per month. You can rent a nice place in Toronto for $3,500/month. And you have $1,500 leftover? Wow! That is great. That is more than enough for clothes and kids' share of food consumption. So it looks like your ex will continue to provide you with free housing.... must be nice.

trueblue22 said:
with 50% section 7 expenses split 50/50. The kids section 7 expenses are close to 200k a year.
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Actually, section 7 expenditures are supposed to be split proportionate to your incomes. In your case, it would be that your ex pays like 90% of the expenditures. So if your kids dance class costs $500, he would pay $450 and you pay $50.

There is no way in heck that section 7 expenditures are $200k per year. If it is, it is completely uncalled for and can easily be scaled back. Either way, see my previous comment about it being proportionate to salary.
 
Your ex makes $500,000 per year and the kids have $200,000 per year in section 7 expenses that you split 50/50?! Something doesn't add up? Why don't you counter you want section 7 split according to income, also place a cap on the section 7 extracurriculars?
 
Brampton33 said:
I am beginning to think that TrueBlue's situation is not real and its just somebody posting ridiculous posts for a ruse.

If this not a ruse, TrueBlue's lawyer clearly sees free money and is not advising his/her client.

TrueBlue: Have you filed and submitted your Financial Statement yet? If not, what are you waiting for? You are not the first person to separate where a house is involved. You cannot afford to buy out your ex, and your ex wants to renovate and sell the house. Your ex is moving forward. Wants to move forward with his life. A judge will have a field day with you and you will be liable for your ex's costs.
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I provided my financial disclosure when I was unemployed and in the process of starting my own business. My ex's lawyer requested financial documents from my new business but I'm not comfortable giving it to him as then he will see how much my bf is making and will use it against me.


The matrimonial home is my home too. I have a trust claim and can prove I provided part of the down payment. My lawyer at the time advised it was fine for me to change the locks and lock him out. I didn't do anything illegal. He moved out.
 
Alpinist said:
Your ex makes $500,000 per year and the kids have $200,000 per year in section 7 expenses that you split 50/50?! Something doesn't add up? Why don't you counter you want section 7 split according to income, also place a cap on the section 7 extracurriculars?
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My ex has paid all section 7 expenses. It wasn't that high before but our second child started private school too, etc. He can afford it. He makes 700k to 900 year.
 
trueblue22 said:
I provided my financial disclosure when I was unemployed and in the process of starting my own business. My ex's lawyer requested financial documents from my new business but I'm not comfortable giving it to him as then he will see how much my bf is making and will use it against me.


The matrimonial home is my home too. I have a trust claim and can prove I provided part of the down payment. My lawyer at the time advised it was fine for me to change the locks and lock him out. I didn't do anything illegal. He moved out.
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It doesn’t matter what you are comfortable with. If he said he wasn’t comfortable giving disclosure because he doesn’t want you to know his income would you accept that? Im sure the answer is no.

You chose to open a business and you also chose to pay your boyfriend a salary rather than take one yourself. You don’t get to say no to disclosure because you made a bad decision.

As for your trust claim, it’s not as much as you want and it definitely isn’t 25k a month.

Your kids will have to quit private school and some of their activities. If you can’t afford them and he doesn’t want to do them then it’s a no. Not to mention he isn’t going to pay you spousal so you can afford expenses. That’s not how it works.


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