Making sure im on the right path.

SynGreis said:
because i dont see why i SHOULDNT. What can they possibly say to justify whatever they may make. It plays no part if they cannot find proof that it impairs me ASSUMING i do it when i am with my son.
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You shouldn't because you risk being judged for it, regardless of whether or not it is illegal. And if you are growing your own, I hope it isn't on the same premises as you will be with your son, as that could open a whole other can of worms.
 
SynGreis said:
because i dont see why i SHOULDNT. What can they possibly say to justify whatever they may make. It plays no part if they cannot find proof that it impairs me ASSUMING i do it when i am with my son.
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They don't need proof. They are providing a subjective opinion which they will dress up in objective terms.

To paraphrase FB, you are a little ant in their world trying to defend your mound of dirt. They will squish you and move on, never knowing or caring what they did to your world.

You are totally correct about drugs, and it totally doesn't matter. Imagine if you had golden showers with groups of strangers every night when you were not with your kid. It shouldn't matter, it is completely legal, but you can bet that you wouldn't get custody if you proudly talked about it. Sure, that's not fair, but nobody cares.

You are an ant thumbing your nose at an elephant. It's not worth it.
 
judged? who cares about being judged. Give proof that is material and tangible and maybe ill care?

and i jsut found out what gold showers were.....man...that is some weird shit.
 
you sound VERY confident that im going to lose this because of weed. I dont know where you are getting your information but i have a friend who smokes regularly because of an injury and had a medical card, i walk in. I smell nothing.
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I said it could help/assist in giving you a negative result during your custody evaluation. I find it fascinating that you can't simply put the pot down while you're going through what should be one of the most important phases of your and your child's life if there's a potential for serious issues to be caused by something that should be an easy choice to make.

Unless you have very screwed up priorities or unless you have a problem with the substance. Your level of defensiveness on the issue is illuminating.

And if you're suggesting to me that pot doesn't smell...lol, I just to laugh. Honestly, if you can't smell pot, I'd really wonder about the health of your nasal passages.

But its your own choice...ultimately, our priorities define our choices. In my opinion, pot seems to be worth you risking your custody evaluation. You don't seem even willing to put it down temporarily. That would never be my choice...but to each their own.

Janus: Forgive me if I mis-read and assumed you were supporting the OP's position.
 
SynGreis said:
But if they are going to base it solely on the fact that i use marijuana to allow myself to cope and be productive, then i must ask, by what relevance do they have in order to use it against me if it by no means affect the child or myself in my performance and and maintenance and care for my child?
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This would be my concern if I was the OCL.

You use Marijuana to cope and be productive? So during the times that you have your child and are not using, then you are not able to cope and not able to be productive??

Slippery slope that justification and denial....
 
you imply that i SHOULD change just for OCL.

You guys are forgetting something. I do it barely 3 times a month. You are also forgetting that OCL cannot possibly take their "judgment" seriously.

Have you guys EVER heard of questioning? Its amazing how much you can kill when the right questions are asked.
 
Yes, they are saying you should change for the OCL.

Obviously it is very important to you or you would simply stop the "3 times a month".
 
i do it casual, what reason do i need to stop? am i suppose to drastically change.

isnt OCL suppose to observe you naturally? not jsut put a front up and make yourself appear innocent.

I only do weed when im stressed. I get stressed when i remember what my situation is. When i conclude my family case that is when i no longer have a need for it.
 
You exhibit some classic signs of being an addict. Reliance on a substance for coping with life, and refusal to stop using it despite very good reasons. Doesn't matter that it's only occasional.

The statement that you think more clearly when you are stoned is also extremely worrisome. Marijuana is a mind-altering substance. The thinking you do while stoned is the thinking that is clouded, and if you can't see that, then it's yet another sign you are addicted.

As for its (il)legality, it doesn't matter that you think it's only positive for you. What matters is that growing it and using it is still considered illicit at the very least and doing so in such a vociferous and defensive manner demonstrates that you prefer to be irresponsible and anti-social rather than mature and pro-social. An irresponsible and anti-social person is less likely to win custody of and access to a child in court than a mature and pro-social one.

It doesn't matter what you personally believe and what questionable studies and legal loopholes you can spout in court to support those beliefs when confronted about it. What matters is that you are handing your ex her successful argument on a silver platter and you are so caught up in your attachment to marijuana use that you can't see this.

Don't do it for OCL. Do it for your kid.
 
When your kids are grown and you can smoke dope (with or without them) this conversation is quite humorous.

Dope - in any form has been around for many decades.

I'm 56 yrs old and I distinctly remember that sniffing glue was the preferred "high" when I was in elementary school. Shocking? I grew up in one of the most affluent areas of the city. When I was in junior high (grade 7) grass was passe. Grade 8 LSD was pretty common at the local ski hill.

Our parents show us the difference between right and wrong.

You want to be a parent?

Grow up. When your child is grown up then plant your plants. Until then you have to conform to Canadian society norms. If you have a problem with this then I suggest you move onto a commune of some sort.
 
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Just to chime in on the marijuana and cas issue... If you receive a medicinal marijuana card, then there are no issues.

I'm a dad who smoked daily for 10+ years. Ex tried to use it against me when we separated but I was still awarded custody. I then volunteered to CAS for them to come to my house and teach me how best to smoke while the kids were in my care. Despite doing it their way, about 4 months later I was told the house smelled. I haven't touched it again since that day over a year ago, with or without my kids.

I can agree that marijuana isn't a bad drug compared to others, should be legalized, and is probably much better than drinking/smoking cigarettes in front of your kids... but it's not worth the risk of one grumpy old school judge taking your kids away for it.
 
you imply that i SHOULD change just for OCL.
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I was implying that you should change for your child and to ensure an ongoing relationship with your child.

If you have to put down pot for a while to get through an OCL investigation...to any normal parent, this would be a no-brainer. I cannot imagine choosing engage in ANY behavior that could potentially be a detriment during a custody evaluation. My children are far, far, far too important to me.

Frankly, what you've very convincing done by your reaction is convince a number of posters that you have an issue with pot.

I only do weed when im stressed. I get stressed when i remember what my situation is. When i conclude my family case that is when i no longer have a need for it.
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So you use due to your mental state...not casually. That's interesting.

And frankly, I doubt you'll ever put it down if you can't put it down during this life event...but that's just my opinion.

Honestly, your judgement on this issue is highly questionable in my observation. I think other posters are telling you the same thing. This forum is a good litmus test for how you are perceived....if I were you, I'd take that to heart and think about what you're risking.

Simple choice...pot vs risking your relationship with your kid.
 
if by the fact that your childs life hangs in the balance because of some old judge or justice, by all means you can petition the court and put in an appropriate writ to compel them to explain themselves. No its not an appeal.

i have seen enough to know that if worst comes to worst, you can just supersede the justice/judges authority. They act as authorized administrators. NEVER forget that.

i changed for my child. but im not going to cahnge for OCL or CAS because they FEEL i should drop it. They hold no weight if they cannot substantiate. Judges and Justices MUST act on EVIDENCE.

What evidence do they have that i would cause harm to my child by way of marijuana?

IF there is none it is IRRELEVANT. UNTIL they have reason for concern and cause of action they CANNOT hold it against me.

Now its not about letting go of weed, its principle, i dont let other people bully me around and threaten to coerce me by way of my child. IT will fail hard and fast.

You guys can succumb to their authority if you wish, i wont.
 
GoDiegoGo said:
I can agree that marijuana isn't a bad drug compared to others, should be legalized, and is probably much better than drinking/smoking cigarettes in front of your kids... but it's not worth the risk of one grumpy old school judge taking your kids away for it.
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Oxymoron way of looking at it......biased in your comment about legalizing it, but at the same time acknowledge that society still frowns upon it.

I still find it funny that smokers attimes try to argue that there is no smell :rolleyes: I have a damn good nose, and can smell things from miles away
 
then dont smoke at your house smoke at a friends place? problem solved.

throw your clothes in the washer/dryer or w/e
 
SadAndTired said:
This would be my concern if I was the OCL.

You use Marijuana to cope and be productive? So during the times that you have your child and are not using, then you are not able to cope and not able to be productive??

Slippery slope that justification and denial....
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Wow...I know right :D

Hopefully he doesn't work in a factory operating heavy machinery, as a pilot or control tower staff, or as an office staff with deliverables expectations

Just as bad as Ben Johnson or Usain Bolt saying I need to be on juice to break the 100m record

The OP needs to be addressing the root problem, as opposed to justifying his habits. A couple of obvious points that should aid in your determination to get help....a.) the money your burning, b.) your health, c.) your kids need you, d.) et al
 
plants or line workers would make me go insane.

as in being productive dealing with the stress of not seeing my child as much as i like to. had joint custody but they bullshitted on an affidavit.

a.not paying
b.my health is actually superb.
c.my child does need me i made the coice to never smoke in his presence or any place he would be at. hence why i never smoke at home and always go to my friends place.
 
I thought you had an incurable debilitating medical condition? Weren't you rushed to the hospital a few times?

My son has asthma. I am addicted to cigarettes/nicotine. I didn't smoke around my son. If people smell smoke when they are around you they immediately rush to judgment that you are smoking around your child. I had a doctor at the hospital once challenge me on this. My son was in hospital and I went outside for a cigarette. Obviously the doctor could smell the smoke residue on me. Had I been in a custody situation I can assure you my smoking would have effected the outcome. I see people smoking all the time with kids in the car. (Not surprising with all the 'smoke nazi's out there). I choose to smoke but it doesn't give me the right to do it around children.

You will likely have to conform if you hope to be involved in actively parenting your child. There is zero tolerance out there for putting kids in potentially hazardous situations. It seems to me that you are giving the mother of the child excellent reason to sway child custody to her advantage.
 
I thought you had an incurable debilitating medical condition? Weren't you rushed to the hospital a few times?

My son has asthma. I am addicted to cigarettes/nicotine. I didn't smoke around my son. If people smell smoke when they are around you they immediately rush to judgment that you are smoking around your child. I had a doctor at the hospital once challenge me on this. My son was in hospital and I went outside for a cigarette. Obviously the doctor could smell the smoke residue on me. Had I been in a custody situation I can assure you my smoking would have effected the outcome. I see people smoking all the time with kids in the car. (Not surprising with all the 'smoke nazi's out there). I choose to smoke but it doesn't give me the right to do it around children.

You will likely have to conform if you hope to be involved in actively parenting your child. There is zero tolerance out there for putting kids in potentially hazardous situations. It seems to me that you are giving the mother of the child excellent reason to sway child custody to her advantage.
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Excellent post Arabian.
 
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