It works for her because you allow yourself to be engaged in her conflict. The more conflict there is the more it will effect custody. If she can prove that the two of you cannot communicate then the chances of having shared custody diminish.
Don't they implement parallel parenting in HC cases? In fact that is what I may ask for. We have status quo of 4 years, how likely is that to be diminished since the child is bonded with both parents and is not directly exposed to conflict (not when with me anyway)? Now I am not saying the judge can't/wont do it but is not it unlikely?
Instead, you need to be able to show that despite the numerous texts/emails etc attempting to start conflict, YOU did not respond and made every attempt to ensure positive communication.
She's baiting you and you're playing the game. It has ZERO to do with gender and EVERYTHING to do with how YOU are handling your side of things.
Let her act batshit crazy. Sit back and watch. But DO NOT respond or get drawn in. It's very simple.
The clothes thing is nothing comparing to what our real conflict it. Here are some examples, but keep in mind she won't write the BIG stuff, she would say it verbally.
Threatening of taking full custody. Once I asked her when I was visiting the sick child during her time under what grounds can she take the child. She said "because we no longer feel safe with you". I couldn't help but laugh....I recorded. After she calmed down she said "Don't let this escalate into court because you know where you are standing". Thats all she said.
Where am I standing? The only conclusion I came up with is that she meant that I take medication for my lifelong anxiety or situational depression.
She sees her self as the better parent. IDC who is better as long as the kid is happy. But if you ask me I see her priority is love life. (can't prove but know it). Them manage some business and having good income is also a card she counts on.
Now here is her provoking in text that I have to reply to. And the reason I say I have to reply is, if I don't, I may look suspicious. Just like Mess said to mamabear4 to her question under Parenting Issues category, what I believe he meant is, if she don't reply her ex has record of emails that her relationship with kid is not good.
But here is what she text me: The child said you told her to hate my bf, she said you fed her junk food, she said you let her play on iphone and I told you not to due to radiation, she told me you teach her to hate her cousin etc etc...IF I don't reply to these I MAY look suspicios but always replied nicely. Then she said don't look for the excuses I believe the child.
Then I told her to call the cas and stop harassing me. That is our conflict mostly about.
And btw, why she wants full custody now. Why she signed Minutes for shared custody. When we separated her family couldn't watch the child and put her in daycare. I took her out because my family can watch them. She was deeply into her bf hunting. The toddler needed extra care comparing to now. She is almost 6 and we no longer fear she will swallow an object or something (even though we still watch for it). Mommy settled with her love life and now finally has time for the child?
