I received a weird email at work

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SingingDad

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Not really divorce/separation related but I wanted to get some opinions on what to do.

I received the following email at my work email:

"Dear [SingingDad], I am writing to express concern for your friend [Friend]. She is friends with a sexual online predator, [man I don't know], who has victimized many women. Please make sure she is safe.

-[Woman I don't know]"

I spoke with my friend and she does know the man who was mentioned in the email, and was actually intending on meeting him for dinner next week. She doesn't know the sender of the email either.

I've let my friend know the information, but still have an uneasy feeling about the whole situation

  • I'm not sure if I should contact the police
  • Should I make further enquiries to the sender about the allagations
  • should I get involved at all
  • how did this person a) know my association with my friend, b) find my work email address
  • why did she choose to contact me
  • My friend is more readily searchable and can be contacted more easily than I, so why didn't this person contact her.
 
SingingDad said:
Not really divorce/separation related but I wanted to get some opinions on what to do.

I received the following email at my work email:

"Dear [SingingDad], I am writing to express concern for your friend [Friend]. She is friends with a sexual online predator, [man I don't know], who has victimized many women. Please make sure she is safe.

-[Woman I don't know]"

I spoke with my friend and she does know the man who was mentioned in the email, and was actually intending on meeting him for dinner next week. She doesn't know the sender of the email either.

I've let my friend know the information, but still have an uneasy feeling about the whole situation

  • I'm not sure if I should contact the police
  • Should I make further enquiries to the sender about the allagations
  • should I get involved at all
  • how did this person a) know my association with my friend, b) find my work email address
  • why did she choose to contact me
  • My friend is more readily searchable and can be contacted more easily than I, so why didn't this person contact her.
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hmm did the woman mention your friend by name? You did your part by telling your friend the contents of the email. It is now her business to decide what to do, not yours.
 
Google all the names and the sending email address! I too would be creeped out by how this woman I don't know knows so much. See what you can find out in return. Are your friend's name and the man's name fairly common? Could it be a generic scam type thing?

If it's heartfelt, you've let your friend know. She can take precautions like not being alone with him till she knows him better, only meeting him in public places, etc. But an experienced and determined predator will gain confidence and trust slowly anyway.

If it's malicious, think about the motivations. Is it a vengeful ex (to keep to our forum theme!) out to make sure her ex can't date new women? Is it someone your friend knows using a fake name to create drama? I'm not sure how the email could be a scam type fraud, as there doesn't seem to be an avenue to monetary gain.

You could always reply to the email, thanking the person for their concern and asking for more information, to see what happens.
 
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Web-forms are a prime target as well, for Spamming. They have automated "bots" that do this. It could still very likely be Spam.

I would ignore this, and get on with your life. If someone was actually concerned about another person, they would call some type of authority. They would not fill out a "web-form".
 
Rioe said:
Google all the names and the sending email address! I too would be creeped out by how this woman I don't know knows so much. See what you can find out in return. Are your friend's name and the man's name fairly common? Could it be a generic

If it's heartfelt, you've let your friend know. She can take precautions like not being alone with him till she knows him better, only meeting him in public places, etc. But an experienced and determined predator will gain confidence and trust slowly anyway.

If it's malicious, think about the motivations. Is it a vengeful ex (to keep to our forum theme!) out to make sure her ex can't date new women? Is it someone your friend knows using a fake name to create drama? I'm not sure how the email could be a scam type fraud, as there doesn't seem to be an avenue to monetary gain.

You could always reply to the email, thanking the person for their concern and asking for more information, to see what happens.
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The names aren't common, and I did google the name of the sender but couldn't find any information. I am truly worried that this is malicious and this person is somehow trying to get me involved a dispute that I am not a part of, or build a phony body of allegations against an innocent person.
 
dad2bandm said:
Web-forms are a prime target as well, for Spamming. They have automated "bots" that do this. It could still very likely be Spam.

I would ignore this, and get on with your life. If someone was actually concerned about another person, they would call some type of authority. They would not fill out a "web-form".
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Yeah but to use specific names, one of a friend, and one of her friends is pretty specific information for a bot to be putting into a webform.
 
Jealous ex?

Some of the people on this forum might be familiar with that type of personality :)
 
wretchedotis said:
Call the police.
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I did on a purely informational basis and they said without direct information of a crime or intent to commit a crime there was little they could or would do, even if I filed a report. I think I will take Rioe's advice and email the person back and see if there are any more details.

Janus said:
Jealous ex?

Some of the people on this forum might be familiar with that type of personality :)
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I have been thinking the same thing but you would really hate to dismiss something like this on an assumption. The fact that the person that contacted me hasn't contacted the police directly is the thing that has me wondering.
 
Are the 3 of you connected online somehow? Like, maybe she is FaceBook friends with the guy and you are a FaceBook friend with her?

I'm on another forum that helps with missing children and adults. They are great at digging up information on the people connected with the missing.

I'd Google him.
 
Yes the facebook connection is there as you described. Which brings up the question of why this person contacted me through work if she found me through Facebook.

What's the other forum's name?
 
Websleuths

You'd be amazed at how much we found out about Michael Rafferty before he went to trial.

I'm at home taking a snow day if you'd like me to do some digging (you can PM me). I have huge curiousity lol
 
SingingDad said:
The names aren't common, and I did google the name of the sender but couldn't find any information. I am truly worried that this is malicious and this person is somehow trying to get me involved a dispute that I am not a part of, or build a phony body of allegations against an innocent person.
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then do not get drawn into anything. Its your friends choice to meet with the guy or not. Are you implying that she needs someone to make those types of decisions for her? Let her make the choice.
 
standing on the sidelines said:
then do not get drawn into anything. Its your friends choice to meet with the guy or not. Are you implying that she needs someone to make those types of decisions for her? Let her make the choice.
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^^This^^

Do a courtesy follow up after the weekend, just in case your friend is dumb enough to go ahead with the hookup.
 
Weird email sent by a weird person no doubt.

You told your friend, that is enough. She should share it with the guy she was going to date.

They can decide what to do about it on their own.

Makes for a good 'how we met' story
 
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