Help!

D

Daddy Andy

New member
Hi all. I am new to this forum. I am hoping I can get some in site to my problem.

In Feb of this year after a court appearance a new court order was issued.

We both received a copy of the new order at the end of July from the courts. Upon reviewing it I noticed that we had not followed the order in regards to child support update and section 7 expenses. The order stated that I was to provide my notice of assessment for the previous tax year by June 1st 2013 and every year following to up date support and that my ex was to provide her notice of assessment as well along with receipts for section 7 expenses.

Within a few days of receiving the order I emailed my ex with my notice of assessment. I let her know that my income had increased which amounted to a $20 per month increase in support. I offered to update the order with a motion to change on consent. I also asked her for a copy of the section 7 receipts and her notice of assessment.

A month went by with no response so I sent a letter which included a copy of the email I sent, my notice of assessment & the request for her notice of assessment and receipts.

Previous to this we had a disagreement regarding a $500 legal cost award she was to receive from me. She felt FRO would garnish where as I was told by my worker they would not because the new order dealt with access as well as support and they couldn't determine how much of the legal fees were specifically for support issues.

As soon as my ex received the court order & realized FRO was not going to garnish she contacted me about payment for these monies. I responded to her right away & since I hadn't heard anything back from her regarding the income tax notice of assessment etc I broached the subject in my response.

She accused me of holding the funds hostage to get the documents required and assured me she intended on respecting the order. At no point did I say I wanted one for the other. I had every intention of paying her and I did. She indicated that she mailed her response, a week earlier, along with her notice of assessment to me.

When two weeks had passed & I hadn't received the response she claims she mailed I notified her by email and suggested she email it or give me a copy when I came to pick up our daughter for access. I received no response & didn't receive anything from her when I arrived at her home

I emailed her after returning my daughter home and she claimed that she meant to give it to me when she saw me but forgot. She said she didn't trust the regular mail so she would send her response by courier with a tracking number.

A week went by with nothing so I emailed her to follow up with no response. Another week went by with nothing so I intended to ask for it when I saw her upon pick up of my daughter. She wasn't home when I arrived to pick up my daughter nor when I returned her home. I again emailed her and suggested it might be more convenient if she emailed me her response with the tax document. I received no response.

We are on week 10 of this. What can I do about this? I am paying for section 7 expenses that aren't necessarily accurate. My support has increased and she won't respond as to whether she wants it or not. Can she take me to court 2 years from now and try to get it out of me? Should I be taking her to court & force her to follow the order? Do I wait until another year or two goes by before doing anything? I am concerned this is going to be the norm.

I represented myself in court and did very well but I am at a loss at what to do now. The judge praised me for my willingness to cooperate and meet in the middle. I had taken her to court for more access and even though we had always updated yearly on our own for child support & section 7 she came up with $16k in arrears she felt I owed which she didn't get. I was ordered to pay for legal fees because I got sick of fighting with her about the access and gave her what she wanted. Since I brought the case before the court and gave in it was considered a win for her. The judge reluctantly gave her $500 of the $5000 she claims she spent on legal advice. She said she had to award something but really didn't want to.

Help
 
First off, I would not pay a cent for S7 unless a receipt is provided. And treat that as a separate issue from CS. As for the increase in CS, I would simply pay the increased amount from the table, and continue to try to get the agreement changed.
 
Right now the section 7 expenses are a monthly amount which was agreed to after figuring out my proportionate share and the receipts at the time.

I chose to use FRO for payment for both CS and S7 because when I was paying her directly she was waiting 3 or 4 months to cash cheques & cashing them all at once.

I can't change the set amount of S7 without her notice of assessment and receipts and of course we have to agree upon what is qualifies. At the time she tried to get me to pay for swimming, sewing club, girl guides, tutoring & child care.

The judge agreed to the last 3 items. I know since then she has quit girl guides, has taken up karate, increased her swimming and went semi-private, attended horse back riding camp.

So how do I make sure I am paying the correct amount for S7 if she won't disclose the required documents?
 
Daddy Andy said:
Right now the section 7 expenses are a monthly amount which was agreed to after figuring out my proportionate share and the receipts at the time.

I chose to use FRO for payment for both CS and S7 because when I was paying her directly she was waiting 3 or 4 months to cash cheques & cashing them all at once.

I can't change the set amount of S7 without her notice of assessment and receipts and of course we have to agree upon what is qualifies. At the time she tried to get me to pay for swimming, sewing club, girl guides, tutoring & child care.

The judge agreed to the last 3 items. I know since then she has quit girl guides, has taken up karate, increased her swimming and went semi-private, attended horse back riding camp.

So how do I make sure I am paying the correct amount for S7 if she won't disclose the required documents?
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I'm sure you will know if you're not paying enough ;)

I think you have taken all the right steps so far.

The next step is a motion to change the S7 to $0.00 as there are no receipts, therefore there must be no expenses. That's extreme but might light a fire under her a$$.
 
I have a similar concern - if my ex refuses to hand over his tax returns every year, or fill out the motion to change on consent but I have done everything I can to adjust CS - can he come after me retroactively? Seems a bit unfair really.

I have pushed very hard to get us to a place where I am paying him EXACTLY what he is owed so he can't come after retroactive, but I can't force him to hand over tax returns every year.
 
HappyMomma said:
I have a similar concern - if my ex refuses to hand over his tax returns every year, or fill out the motion to change on consent but I have done everything I can to adjust CS - can he come after me retroactively? Seems a bit unfair really.

I have pushed very hard to get us to a place where I am paying him EXACTLY what he is owed so he can't come after retroactive, but I can't force him to hand over tax returns every year.
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Actually you probably could.

I'm sure your requests for these documents was in writing. If he did come after you all you would have to do is provide them as evidence.

I would refuse to pay any S7 expenses until I had his tax return.

I would send him an email followed by a registered letter, stating that you are more than willing to pay your share of the expenses and once you have his tax return you can then calculate your proportional cost, however you will not be paying anything until he has provided you full financial disclosure as required.
 
HappyMomma.....every year for 7 years my ex and I exchanged information with the exception of one year. She didn't want to disclose her income so I didn't pay section 7. When I took her to court for more access she tried to say that I owed that to her, said that the amounts we agreed upon in the past were wrong, etc...to the tune of $16k. The judge dismissed it all because I had proof that I had given her my income tax info every year, the letters of negotiation back & forth. The judge said she didn't have a case.

Also, to protect myself I registered with FRO. I can make additional payments to FRO at any time. For example, when we were in court I knew my support had increased so I started remitting the increase to FRO. The money sat in the FRO account until the court order was processed & I didn't have any arrears to catch up.
 
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Daddy Andy said:
HappyMomma.....every year for 7 years my ex and I exchanged information with the exception of one year. She didn't want to disclose her income so I didn't pay section 7. When I took her to court for more access she tried to say that I owed that to her, said that the amounts we agreed upon in the past were wrong, etc...to the tune of $16k. The judge dismissed it all because I had proof that I had given her my income tax info every year, the letters of negotiation back & forth. The judge said she didn't have a case.

Also, to protect myself I registered with FRO. I can make additional payments to FRO at any time. For example, when we were in court I knew my support had increased so I started remitting the increase to FRO. The money sat in the FRO account until the court order was processed & I didn't have any arrears to catch up.
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Thanks Daddy and FB - that makes me feel somewhat better. My ex likes to NOT do things (ie: provide financials, receipts, etc), then belly ache about how I'm 'causing our children hardship'. It's frustrating to say the least.
 
HappyMomma said:
Thanks Daddy and FB - that makes me feel somewhat better. My ex likes to NOT do things (ie: provide financials, receipts, etc), then belly ache about how I'm 'causing our children hardship'. It's frustrating to say the least.
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I love the "hardship" quotes, blaming you because they don't want to cooperate. Oh the irony.

There is no reasoning with people like that. Just say, in an email, that the second you get the receipts/financials/etc the money will be provided within x days. As you do not have receipts/financials/etc it is not possible for you to know how much to provide.

You don't pay Bell without a receipt. It's strictly a business transaction and should be treated as such without any emotion.
 
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