MiViLaLoco
New member
I'm not sure if this has already been asked and answered...
Why not just do the exchange via the childcare provider?
My ex and I have been doing this from the start. He is very high conflict, and controlling, yet we manage very well (given the circumstances) because I know enough to keep our face-to-face contact to a minimum. Right from the start (when our child was 3 1/2) we have always used the childcare provider and now school as the location for picking up and dropping off.
I guess what I'm trying to say is we've arranged our access schedule so that all the exchanges can be done without the other party present. Which makes everyone, including our child, very happy.
Now, that being said, whenever we deviate from this (ex: Christmas, extra holidays, birthdays, family events, etc) and have face-to-face contact...he cannot resist trying to create conflict via rude comments and inappropriate remarks...and even nagging. Every time! It is very interesting and I no longer let it bother me in the slightest. He is who he is. I have just learned how to remove the temptation for him to be an assclown in front of our child as much as possible.
So, if you haven't tried this approach...I'd highly recommend it.
Why not just do the exchange via the childcare provider?
My ex and I have been doing this from the start. He is very high conflict, and controlling, yet we manage very well (given the circumstances) because I know enough to keep our face-to-face contact to a minimum. Right from the start (when our child was 3 1/2) we have always used the childcare provider and now school as the location for picking up and dropping off.
I guess what I'm trying to say is we've arranged our access schedule so that all the exchanges can be done without the other party present. Which makes everyone, including our child, very happy.
Now, that being said, whenever we deviate from this (ex: Christmas, extra holidays, birthdays, family events, etc) and have face-to-face contact...he cannot resist trying to create conflict via rude comments and inappropriate remarks...and even nagging. Every time! It is very interesting and I no longer let it bother me in the slightest. He is who he is. I have just learned how to remove the temptation for him to be an assclown in front of our child as much as possible.
So, if you haven't tried this approach...I'd highly recommend it.