Ex's parents have bought her home Spousal Support?

S

Stephenl

New member
My ex is asking for spousal support while she lives in a home of equal value to our matrimonial home. As none of the equity from the matrimonial home has been settled, her parents have bought the new home for her though it is in her name. On her salary there is no possible way for her to pay minimum mortgage requirements on a 450 000 dollar home.

Our incomes differ by about 60 000, but she enjoys substantial support from her parents including her legal fees.

We share access with our children. If she is awarded spousal support the likely outcome will be the kids and I will lose our home.

Do spousal support tables apply in a case like this?
Grateful for any help as always.
Truly in awe of people's hard earned knowledge. Thank you.
 
It's possible.
I don't know a ton about spousal support.
But from what I understand she'd have to prove entitlement. Things like # of children, length of marriage, if she gave up employment to aid your career, salaries etc will all be factors.
 
If she can prove entitlement, then yes, the Spousal Support Guidelines apply even if the payor will be poor and the recipient will be rich.
 
-In quebec regular support a party receives from a parent etc... Can be considered income.
-you can also argue that she is lying about her income since she qualified for the home
-what kind of marriage did you have?
 
BitHunter said:
If she can prove entitlement, then yes, the Spousal Support Guidelines apply even if the payor will be poor and the recipient will be rich.
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There are no legally forceful spousal support guidelines - it's always something negotiated between the spouses (and if the spouses can't come to agreement, a judge will make a ruling based on what s/he thinks is fair in that particular case ).

That said, the fact that your ex has a new home which her parents may have paid for does not mean that spousal support will be reduced. Usually, the rationale for spousal support is that it compensates one spouse for financial sacrifices s/her might have made during the marriage which benefited the other spouse, such as staying out of the workforce to raise kids while the other spouse advanced his/her career, moving or switching jobs to support the other spouse's career, etc. If your ex can argue that she compromised her own earning potential in order to support your career, she may be awarded spousal support regardless of who paid for the house she lives in now.

My bf had a very similar situation - his ex had been a SAHM; they separated; her mother paid for a new property for her (much more expensive than the matrimonial home); he tried to include this when they were negotiating spousal support; the judge said that her mother's contribution was irrelevant because spousal support was based on the conditions of the marriage, not on whatever gifts the ex might receive after the marriage.
 
^that's it in a nutshell Stripes. Some people live large after divorce (certainly not me) by shacking up with someone else (genderless) and they find themselves in a much better financial position than when they were married.

With that said "need and ability to pay" are also weighed but these are only part of a multitude of factors considered when determining SS. Presenting budgets is usually a step taken at the start and if handled properly can be very useful in SS negotiations.
 
SS is determined by a bunch of factors. One of them is compensatory (if your ex's earning potential suffered due to the marriage, by giving up job opportunities or making career sacrifices) and another is need (if your ex simply has less earning power than you, or none).

On a compensatory basis, it's strictly by the events of the marriage, not what kind of home each of you live in after separation.

On a needs basis, budgets come into play. You both present one as part of financial disclosure, showing your income and expenses. If your income can cover your expenses, and hers cannot, then you may be required to pay her some SS. But reasonableness of expenses should also be taken into account. Both spouses should expect a reduction in lifestyle - that's just how it is when the same total income is now maintaining two households instead of one.

If your ex's parents buy her a house such that her expenses are not reduced compared to the home when you were together, then I don't see how you can be expected to support that for her when you can't for yourself. You can express that it's nice that she has a good home for the children and be grateful to her parents for doing that, but you can't be expected to support those expenses to a greater degree than you do for your own home. What if they were fabulously wealthy and bought her a mansion? Certainly the upkeep should not fall to you.

Is there enough total income to support two houses similar to your matrimonial home? If you say you'll have to downsize, then I'm guessing not. I personally can't see how you could be held responsible for making up the shortfall if she chooses not to also downsize but to live in a house beyond her means. I've heard some horror stories so I guess it does happen.
 
If your ex's parents buy her a house such that her expenses are not reduced compared to the home when you were together, then I don't see how you can be expected to support that for her when you can't for yourself. You can express that it's nice that she has a good home for the children and be grateful to her parents for doing that, but you can't be expected to support those expenses to a greater degree than you do for your own home. What if they were fabulously wealthy and bought her a mansion? Certainly the upkeep should not fall to you.

Is there enough total income to support two houses similar to your matrimonial home? If you say you'll have to downsize, then I'm guessing not. I personally can't see how you could be held responsible for making up the shortfall if she chooses not to also downsize but to live in a house beyond her means. I've heard some horror stories so I guess it does happen.[/QUOTE]
 
Thanks Rioe,
In terms of compensatory, her career was determined before our marriage and her trajectory has not been impacted as a result of the years she spent with reduced hours to care for the children.
On a needs basis, as soon as my mortgage increases with the buyout of her share my monthly mortgage payment will increase dramatically.
I'm unaware of what she is being asked to pay monthly to her parents if anything at all.
I do know that if her mortgage were through a bank instead of her parents there is no possible way she would be able to make the minimum payment required.
Can I request her repayment schedule and proof that payments are being made?
 
I can't help but feel that you are nit-picking your ex. Her current financial situation is not your concern.

You say that her career wasn't impacted as a result of reduced hours. That is merely your opinion and irrelevant.

People get divorced all the time and often they have to downsize. With this in mind you might need to give consideration to selling the house. If you are intent on trying to live in the same style of living as when you were married then you might have to get a 2nd job. Reality is though, it costs money to maintain 2 separate households.

You can request all that you want. Whether or not her parents, or Santa Claus, pays for her abode is simply none of your business unless you are filing a motion for change of material circumstances - undue hardship.
 
^^^ Yes. Not your business what ex pays for her mortgage, any more than it's her business how much you spend on groceries or cable. You're not married any more. Making intrusive requests for financial details won't get you anywhere.

Your ex may make the argument that her career was impacted because she reduced her hours to care for your children (the fact that here's now a $60K income difference between the two of you suggests that you did quite well during the marriage and she did not - but of course I don't know all the relevant facts). You may make the argument that it wasn't. If the two of you can't agree on a shared version of history, your lawyers (or a judge) will make the decision for you. It might be wiser in the long run to compromise on some amount of SS rather than spend a lot of money in court, but that's a call you will have to make.

Arabian is right, you may have to think about selling your house. Whether or not your ex has a new house or a nicer house shouldn't affect your decision about whether you can afford to keep yours. It can be galling to see the ex apparently living comfortably while you're scrabbling to make payments, but if you let bitterness get in the way of your financial planning, you'll just waste a lot of your time.
 
In ontario they don't you for a statement of your monthly expenses in court?
In quebec they always ask you for that.
 
Links17 said:
In ontario they don't you for a statement of your monthly expenses in court?
In quebec they always ask you for that.
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^^^True enough, in Quebec they expect both parties to provide full and frank financial disclosure - more than just your line 150 - you must make a detailed spreadsheet of all your expenses, debts and income, the case cannot progress without that info.
 
I can totally relate to the OP's being upset about this. My ex had an affair that ended our marriage and had the new BF buy her a house 3 doors down the street and support her. Hard not to be bitter about that and then get a request for exorbitant spousal support because she has no income (he's supporting her) and showing huge monthly bills (i.e. trying to demonstrate need) when we all know he's paying. And my lawyer says "not much we can do...".

There are definitely winners and losers coming out of divorces.
 
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