Ex husband paying girlfriend to babysit?

Going to take a different look at this. I find it odd that someone who makes over $500k annually would try to alleviate some of his support payment by padding s.7 expenditures. That is the type of salary that does not lend itself to resorting to pettiness.


Key words in her post “I think”. She is focusing on what he may be doing rather than providing her financial disclosure which after (I believe) six months is the dumbest thing to do.
 
Key words in her post �I think�. She is focusing on what he may be doing rather than providing her financial disclosure which after (I believe) six months is the dumbest thing to do.
A number of months back I explained to the OP the likely outcome of her case. Its not rocket science.

House: It will be sold and she will receive her share of proceeds. However, OP is content squandering her share of proceeds and has racked up over $100k in legal bills before even getting into a courtroom.

Children: Likely be 50/50 and joint custody.

Supports: She will get offset CS and a period of spousal support. Given her ex's salary compared to hers, her offset is something like a staggering $5000k per month. 99% of posters on this forum would take that in a heartbeat, however OP seems to believe that she should keep the house, have all her bills paid for, and live the same lifestyle as her ex. He makes $500k per year. She does not.

She is only dragging her feet because she wants to stall the finalization of her marriage.
 
You are absolutely obligated to turn over your business financials... 100%. To not do so, is just a huge waste of your money and likely have to cover his legal fees to get you to disclose.
 
He is refusing to provide an updated financial statement without me disclosing information about my business. We are at a standstill. I am happy staying in the house with him paying all the bills.

OK. This sums is it up. TrueBlue is happy with things they way they are.

For the rest of us it would be good to know about the babysitting thing. Daycare by a professional daycare is one thing, baby sitting is something different even if it is during the day, it is like a nanny.
 
Going to take a different look at this. I find it odd that someone who makes over $500k annually would try to alleviate some of his support payment by padding s.7 expenditures. That is the type of salary that does not lend itself to resorting to pettiness.

Good point. In the grand scheme of things... You would need some serious child care to off-set the CS owed on 500k. I agree.
 
but only a little bit to set-off your ex
:)


I have a feeling the kids have been left with gf a few times and tb22 is pissed and making up ideas about what he is doing and why. All to avoid dealing with the real issue which is disclosure.

Im actually surprised her ex hasnt filed a motion for disclosure which he would win costs on. Unless he is planning that along with a big motion and is about to blind side her.
 
Im actually surprised her ex hasnt filed a motion for disclosure which he would win costs on. Unless he is planning that along with a big motion and is about to blind side her.
That is what I am thinking. Ex has serious cash and is not paying a lawyer to stall or just get through the process. TB22's ex wants the house sold so he can finalize everything dealing with his ex, including equalization. My sense is that she will get served with a motion dealing with everything in one swoop.
 
I always feel sad for the kids in these type of divorce battle situations.

But also- I really REALLY want to see the decision on this case reported if it ever makes it to court. Sheeit- I want to see the entire transcript of the proceeding.
 
I always feel sad for the kids in these type of divorce battle situations.

But also- I really REALLY want to see the decision on this case reported if it ever makes it to court. Sheeit- I want to see the entire transcript of the proceeding.


Me too. Especially since she will be that petty parent at every single event focused on herself and her feelings.

I wish I could be in the court room when the judge blasts her for her games. I just had the transcripts from my husband’s motion and he had to fill in where she blustered, where she cried and where she continued to anger the judge.
 
That is what I am thinking. Ex has serious cash and is not paying a lawyer to stall or just get through the process. TB22's ex wants the house sold so he can finalize everything dealing with his ex, including equalization. My sense is that she will get served with a motion dealing with everything in one swoop.

Bingo.

But, it will be after enough time where the "need" for SS will have a solid argument in his favor. If you are making 500K... the math to stall works out.

Life time SS vs not a life time of SS.

What also is happening is that the 500k parent probably has a really good lawyer... Who works with high income earners... They will drag the other parent to poverty then make a one-time SS final offer lump sum payment that will cover off their silly legal debt... Life time of SS gone... CS is a joke to a 500k earner... As well, CS generally doesn't last forever.

I mean its pretty common in the high price legal disputes...
 
What also is happening is that the 500k parent probably has a really good lawyer... Who works with high income earners... They will drag the other parent to poverty then make a one-time SS final offer lump sum payment that will cover off their silly legal debt... .
That is exactly what has been going on. The OP has already spent over $100k in legal bills and has not even stepped into the courtroom yet. The OP's lawyer should have caught on regarding the delay and drain tactic and offered the OP a strategy to stop the bleeding of finances. OP is banking on a windfall but doesn't realize that windfall is diminishing more and more with time and legal fees.
 
Listen to Tayken. There's no need to keep attacking OP!! Ex is most likely well represented and knows what he's doing.
OP is not being attacked. OP is being helped to see the light. If you had read previous posts from OP, you would see that OP is begrudging in the separation process. Its been 5-6 years since she's separated and her ex wants to conclude all ties to her, yet OP won't even release her financial statements to get ball rolling on that standard step in the process. OP has spent alot of money to date and is at serious risk of incurring her ex's legal costs. If anything, the posts are aimed at helping OP.
 
... her ex wants to conclude all ties to her, yet OP won't even release her financial statements to get ball rolling on that standard step in the process.

Understand that if ex wanted this over with, he'd have full control to do that long ago. Then let the strong feelings towards OP go...
 
That is exactly what has been going on. The OP has already spent over $100k in legal bills and has not even stepped into the courtroom yet. The OP's lawyer should have caught on regarding the delay and drain tactic and offered the OP a strategy to stop the bleeding of finances. OP is banking on a windfall but doesn't realize that windfall is diminishing more and more with time and legal fees.

One thing to note... That all lawyers, like contractors in any industry, are working for their own profitability first then their client. So, the reason that the OP's lawyer hasn't "caught on" is because they are running up the bill knowing this is going to happen. See the only people profiting from the conflict are the lawyers. So it is in the best interests of BOTH lawyers to run up the money.

Both lawyers know how much money there is to be made on the file... They have seen it all before... and profited from it.
 
Understand that if ex wanted this over with, he'd have full control to do that long ago. Then let the strong feelings towards OP go...

I suspect the other party in this matter has their lawyer on /ignore /slap mode. Running up costs... They are a path to reduce risk and financial impact. Rarely do you see high income earners rip through the court system. These things can go on 10-20 years some times!
 
Limitations, entitlement, reduced need for higher support, equalization/debt, and more are all added benefits the other party enjoys - in addition to running up ex's costs.
 
Okay to op
You remind me of my ex

My legal fees are more than yours amd not into a settlement conference

Why because there is a serious behaviour problem. If I ask for info on kids it is “call my lawyer”. It’s like this but with everything. What the ex did not realize that when my lawyer has to write hers asking for a copy of the health cards, it costs her as well.

3 years later, she is knee deep in debt, renting and ss is running out. In fact it seems like when she successfully went after arrears, her lawyer kept all of it as a retainer and didn’t give her anything for taxes. Total predator move.

She has been an instrument of her own demise, and finally is backing down, thankfully because bankruptcy has to be soon for her.

This will happen to you, and your lawyer is totally doing the same thing to you. You seem overly focused on your entitlement that you have shared more than half of it to your lawyer. Just settle and get on with your life.

You need to evict this situation which is living rent free in your mind
 
I actually went back and reread some posts

I am not sure how many years you guys were together

Rock scan has been trying to help you

Everyone here is still trying to help you

Just settle the damn thing while you can

I would hate to see you in a permanent financial trench because of bad decisions you made years hago.

I’ll give you an example in my case that hopefully when you read it, you will think wow that wasn’t smart…and now apply it to some of your decisions

3 months after separation, the ex thought she was going to get a windfall and her current car lease was expiring..she went from 630 a month to 1200 a month.
Now that lease is ending in a few months…and now she won’t even be able to get anything decent because of shortage..and no way to pay the balance

This is an example of bad decision making from not thinking long term, I won’t even get into the housing of my kids..but same shitt

Sell the house, give the disclosure and do the best you can
 
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