Custody of grandkids

G

gramma

New member
Hi There
Looking for some advice regarding the custody of my grandkids. I have had custody since birth of both grandkids (10yrs). Now my child who lives a transient lifestyle has served me looking for sole custody of them. She has always been in their lives, although more like a sibbling than a parent. I am certain the best interest of the kids will be that they remain in my custody until they are old enough to make decisions for themselves...however, I am wondering if there is a way to simplify the court procedure. I do not want to drag this out in court as it will cost a fortune for me while she has legal aid. But also I think it's really a waste of everyones time. Any advice would be appreciated!!

Thank you in advance,
Gramma
 
There is quite a bit of incentive for a chronically unemployed individual, with no home, to seek custody of children: Subsidized housing, government child benefit payments to name just two. The same could be said for grandparents and foster parents I suppose. The idea is that society should assist parents, when they are financially unable, to raise their own children and to have support in place which will enable these parents to become self-sufficient.

With that said, what are the biggest hurdles for your daughter in being able to raise her own children?
 
She has tried to be maternal..but really does not have the maternal instinct.
I am just looking to see if there might be a quick way to resolve this instead of going through the full court process.
 
You can always make an offer to settle. You should do this even if you end up going through court.

Perhaps there is some middle ground?

It is probably a good idea for you to retain a lawyer. You would have a deadline to respond (should be in the documents you were served).
 
Without knowing details of your situation it is difficult to offer specific advice.

Presumably you reside in Ontario?
You state you have sole custody. How did this come about?
Did you have a lawyer at one time?

Here is a link to some basic information:

https://www.attorneygeneral.jus.gov.on.ca/english/family/guides/fc/part_8.html

What sort of document were you served with?

Did the document outline any sort of a parenting plan? What are the reasons she stated to justify a change in custody?
 
Yes I reside in Ontario.
C.A.S. was involved with both kids from birth and they are the ones who gave me custody of the kids. It was their lawyers that did all the foot work back then.

The document is a motion to change...her reasons stated are that she is older now and can take care of them now...she has a fiancee who she has been dating for 6 months. She has had 4 different addresses within the last 8 months
 
You may want to contact CAS then as they will want to make sure her home is safe, her fiance is safe, she has supports in place etc. They should do an investigation. Plus they were a party to the original motion and should also be involved.
 
rockscan said:
You may want to contact CAS then as they will want to make sure her home is safe, her fiance is safe, she has supports in place etc. They should do an investigation. Plus they were a party to the original motion and should also be involved.
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I agree. Obviously you have status quo but mom has been heavily involved in the child's life I think you said and is beginning to get her shit together. I think a graduated access schedule leading to equal time might not be the worst idea. The child needs to know that her mom .. can be a mother. Why not see how it goes instead of fighting in court?
 
I would definitely facilitate her motion to change. Request her to take parenting courses and allow her the chance to parent her kids. Mention the lack of stability (i.e., constant change of residence). I don't see how her dating men is relevant. Are they drug junkies? Parents can't criticize each other for having multiple partners and I don't see how a grandparent could. Either way, The courts will get final say. Though I am grateful CAS gave you the kids as oppose to tossing them in the dog pound and putting them up for adoption.
 
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A few things.

1- is mom address in the school catchment?

2-is she employed, able to support child?

3-since she has been involved has she seen child on a consistent schedule?

5- what is the access plan proposed by mom? She should have a parenting plan?

6- what about dad? has he been involved?
 
did I miss something? I don't see any mention of the mother being heavily involved in the children's lives.
 
arabian said:
did I miss something? I don't see any mention of the mother being heavily involved in the children's lives.
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gramma said:
She has always been in their lives, although more like a sibbling than a parent.
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Grandparents generally don't do well in family law. This case is different because gramma actually has custody. I'm not clear on how CAS gives custody, so maybe she doesn't actually have custody, but I'm not sure.

At the very least, I don't think this is a case that will be resolved quickly. If the mother is able to demonstrate a genuine turnaround, things could possibly go in her favour. This likely requires a full trial, I don't think a motion for summative judgement will fly here.
 
The only way to ensure these children would never be taken from you is if you legally adopted them. There is a difference between having legal custody, and CAS asking you to take custody. There is also Kinship Care through CAS. Do you receive financial assistance from CAS?

Your daughter will have to prove that she is capable of being a parent.

It's a tough decision for you after having them for 10 years.
 
gramma said:
yes I do have sole custody
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When you say sole custody, were moms rights as a parent removed by the courts? Did the children become crown wards before granting you sole custody?

If the children were not crown wards and you just have sole custody, this is similar to one parent having sole custody. That doesn't mean the other parent has no access rights and change in circumstances can change custody/access.

I am sure CAS will want to know if the children were back in her care more than the parenting plan stated and it would be worth a call to your case worker/agency. I am sure they could help you out in some form.

Mom has obviously been in their lives and I assume they know she is their mother? A gradual transition back into moms care may not be a bad thing for the children if mom can get her life together


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I thank you all for the advice and tips etc. I have talked with the lawyer as well as CAS and will work it out. I will see how it all goes. Thank you again, I really appreciate everything on this site!!!
 
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