Originally posted by BitHunter
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Originally posted by Pursuinghappiness View PostNah, FB. You're a nice, modest, good guy. You'll do well in the dating world. You're a catch!
I'm pretty rough at it, but I will find my groove. Honestly I have no idea what I want still, so I'm ok with casual dating and just doing my own thing.
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Originally posted by oink View PostLooks like am going to have to setup a workshop on here....
There will be no fees of course charged by yours truly,
- Chivalry should always be up there from the moment you meet that person. I know this might sound weird, but always have a little token gift with you for the person (am not talking jewellery here). If you've been talking for a while, you should know what she sort of likes
- Initiate a hug, Why? You want her to get a sniff of your not-cheap perfume (think pheromones), she will let you know that you smell good, and you can say "thank you". This is huge belive it or not, as men like a nice smelling woman also..it gets you giddy :-) Yes some of us shower every morning and deodorize, but wearing perfume for social meets is OK
- Pay compliment to her on her outfit (Huge brownie point for you)
- eye contact always
- Listen, let her speak (as oppose to liking the sound of your own voice)
- Flirt...touching here and there is good, especially when she cracks a joke (even if it's not funny), acknowledge it with a smile :-)
- Avoid coffee shop "meets", it has a the potential to create awkward thumb fiddling moments of silence. Outside is where you want to be...i.e. park, waterfront, museum, galleries or some fun activity
- Plan the meet mutually (don't dominate), but have suggestions...nothing worse than saying..."whatever is fine with me". Don't do it
- If you haven't tried any of this, and you wonder what you are doing wrong, perhaps it's some of these point I have listed? Tweak your ways and adopt this, and you might just come back here and thank me
- This should get you laid sooner than you anticipated. Well of course this is secondary to good communication and all the other good attributes we look for.
Personally...My approach is exactly what I just listed above, but there is one attribute that automatically captures a woman's attention when we speak before even meeting...."my accent" (I try to draw focus away from it most of the time)
How is all this working out for me? Well, I have never had a problem attracting any woman am interested in (no am not bragging).
And if anyone has trouble finding a woman on here ... its coz they are all with oink
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Originally posted by oink View PostLooks like am going to have to setup a workshop on here....
There will be no fees of course charged by yours truly,
- Chivalry should always be up there from the moment you meet that person. I know this might sound weird, but always have a little token gift with you for the person (am not talking jewellery here). If you've been talking for a while, you should know what she sort of likes
- Initiate a hug, Why? You want her to get a sniff of your not-cheap perfume (think pheromones), she will let you know that you smell good, and you can say "thank you". This is huge belive it or not, as men like a nice smelling woman also..it gets you giddy :-) Yes some of us shower every morning and deodorize, but wearing perfume for social meets is OK
NOTE: Not a strong colgne like: Eternity, Polo, Allure or JOOP. You want something soft smelling that isn't off putting....not going to give away one of the ones I wear :-)
- Pay compliment to her on her outfit (Huge brownie point for you)
- eye contact always
- Listen, let her speak (as oppose to liking the sound of your own voice)
- Flirt...touching here and there is good, especially when she cracks a joke (even if it's not funny), acknowledge it with a smile :-)
- Avoid coffee shop "meets", it has a the potential to create awkward thumb fiddling moments of silence. Outside is where you want to be...i.e. park, waterfront, museum, galleries or some fun activity
- Plan the meet mutually (don't dominate), but have suggestions...nothing worse than saying..."whatever is fine with me". Don't do it
- If you haven't tried any of this, and you wonder what you are doing wrong, perhaps it's some of these point I have listed? Tweak your ways and adopt this, and you might just come back here and thank me
- This should get you laid sooner than you anticipated. Well of course this is secondary to good communication and all the other good attributes we look for.
Personally...My approach is exactly what I just listed above, but there is one attribute that automatically captures a woman's attention when we speak before even meeting...."my accent" (I try to draw focus away from it most of the time)
How is all this working out for me? Well, I have never had a problem attracting any woman am interested in (no am not bragging).
But that has also started to improve, we shall see.
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Originally posted by oink View PostYou need to get out more...i.e. get some activities into ya
As someone alluded to, there is already stuff happening on the DL
I'm pretty satisfied with where I am right now - I was more looking for the entertainment value of a drama llama forum ...
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Originally posted by oink View PostHmmm....This is where communication is paramount, well of course am sure there are times where you feel you are having a monologue, as opposed to a dialogue, because the replies aren't forthcoming..i.e. it feels like you are pulling teeth?
It could just be that they are shy, "easy going", or just can't hold a convo, and expecting you to drive it?
There are icebreaker points (no, am not talking sending a pic of your Pen**, or for the ladies, a provocative picture of yourself to the guy). I'll see that as a REDFLAG, and makes you wonder how many people he or she is doing that to Definitely no "what are you wearing questions, like who cares and what good if you aren't there?
Personally..I am not interested in the infatuation as an icebreaker, and to take me back to a comment I made before that someone jumped on because they misunderstood me.....I'll say it again, I need substance that has the potential to take things to the finish line, not the fluff that I can get anywhere, even if that means paying for it, if you are the desparate type that can't get women / men (this is what the poster misunderstood)
Hi, wassup and hello...are lame, and won't get you anywhere. You can ask how the damn day is going, how the week has been so far, palns for the weekend (it might include you, if cards are played right)
Then step it up to work, education, family (siblings etc), interests, hobbies, outlook on life, personality test-like questions indirectly
I know lots of women who like men in jeans, and some of them are quite classy women.
A gift on a first date can be creepy if it is too much. Flowers are usually safe. No carnations unless you know she likes them.
Some women like scents, some don't.
Hugs on a first date? At the end if you get the sense its mutual. But some people have a different sense of personal space, and it might be too much for some. Its all about knowing a bit about someone's personality.
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Originally posted by slughead10 View Postthats why you bring the dog....he will sort out the smelly ones while making sure your date keeps your personal space secure.......
ever see how a dog treats a women with a smelly one? i promise it is entertaining and keeps them back .....
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I'm pretty rough at it, but I will find my groove. Honestly I have no idea what I want still, so I'm ok with casual dating and just doing my own thing.
Comment
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Originally posted by oink View PostLooks like am going to have to setup a workshop on here....
There will be no fees of course charged by yours truly,
- Chivalry should always be up there from the moment you meet that person. I know this might sound weird, but always have a little token gift with you for the person (am not talking jewellery here). If you've been talking for a while, you should know what she sort of likes
- Initiate a hug, Why? You want her to get a sniff of your not-cheap perfume (think pheromones), she will let you know that you smell good, and you can say "thank you". This is huge belive it or not, as men like a nice smelling woman also..it gets you giddy :-) Yes some of us shower every morning and deodorize, but wearing perfume for social meets is OK
NOTE: Not a strong colgne like: Eternity, Polo, Allure or JOOP. You want something soft smelling that isn't off putting....not going to give away one of the ones I wear :-)
- Pay compliment to her on her outfit (Huge brownie point for you)
- eye contact always
- Listen, let her speak (as oppose to liking the sound of your own voice)
- Flirt...touching here and there is good, especially when she cracks a joke (even if it's not funny), acknowledge it with a smile :-)
- Avoid coffee shop "meets", it has a the potential to create awkward thumb fiddling moments of silence. Outside is where you want to be...i.e. park, waterfront, museum, galleries or some fun activity
- Plan the meet mutually (don't dominate), but have suggestions...nothing worse than saying..."whatever is fine with me". Don't do it
- If you haven't tried any of this, and you wonder what you are doing wrong, perhaps it's some of these point I have listed? Tweak your ways and adopt this, and you might just come back here and thank me
- This should get you laid sooner than you anticipated. Well of course this is secondary to good communication and all the other good attributes we look for.
Personally...My approach is exactly what I just listed above, but there is one attribute that automatically captures a woman's attention when we speak before even meeting...."my accent" (I try to draw focus away from it most of the time)
How is all this working out for me? Well, I have never had a problem attracting any woman am interested in (no am not bragging).
For the record, which one of the above "musts" caused the ex to seek out a different bald-headed hermit to stuff her artichoke with?
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Originally posted by Pursuinghappiness View PostIts all good if you enjoy dating. I got really sick of it pretty fast. I think I probably would have stopped bothering if I hadn't met Mr. Perfect. The good thing is that so many people are getting divorced, there's a growing dating pool to choose from.
But everyone deserves to be happy ... so its all good
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