Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Sole custody and consultation with decisions

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • Sole custody and consultation with decisions

    My current order states that I have sole custody and am the primary care for my daughter but I am to consult with her mother on major recreational activities, matters relation to health and education. If an agreement cannot be made, then I am at liberty to make the final decision and her mother can initiate court or seek mediation.

    If her mother states she doesn’t agree do I have to wait until mediation is sought or court proceedings? Or any hint that she is seeking those? I am getting hassle because I want to put my daughter in dance that only effects my time. Mother doesn’t want it because of the sec. 7 cost. I asked if she is going to bring it up in our court proceedings to try and stop it or seek mediation and I haven’t gotten an answer.

  • #2
    Enroll her in dance class and change your argument to be that you would like the other parent to pay their share of s7 expense for classes.

    With that thought in mind someone else can tell you if you are in a can't lose situation in regards to the fees. If you are talking an unusually large amount of money then that may be an issue. For example your daughter is at an elite level. I don't think that is the case here.

    Comment


    • #3
      Originally posted by pinkHouses View Post
      Enroll her in dance class and change your argument to be that you would like the other parent to pay their share of s7 expense for classes.

      With that thought in mind someone else can tell you if you are in a can't lose situation in regards to the fees. If you are talking an unusually large amount of money then that may be an issue. For example your daughter is at an elite level. I don't think that is the case here.
      Yeah it’s beginner dance. It’s like $40 a day two days a week all on my time. But the mother is mad about the increase in sec. 7. I’m at the point where I would just pay it myself but finances are slim with me now having to acquire a lawyer.

      Comment


      • #4
        Originally posted by Hide on Bush View Post
        Yeah it’s beginner dance. It’s like $40 a day two days a week all on my time. But the mother is mad about the increase in sec. 7. I’m at the point where I would just pay it myself but finances are slim with me now having to acquire a lawyer.
        $320 per month can be a hardship on some people but so is fighting about things and forcing court.

        5 weeks of dance classes = 1 hour with a lawyer.

        Seems like you may be able to use that lawyer time more wisely and get the kid to dance class. I say this because you were seeking to file an emergency motion, even if you won that and were awarded costs you would be out of pocket more than it would cost to send your kid to dance class for 3 months.

        If you are worried about costs then find a less expensive school like non-divorced people do.

        Comment


        • #5
          I'm on mother's side.
          1. $40 per lesson twice a week is not beginners dance. It should be closer to $100 for 2.5 months.
          2. You say you can't afford it but expect mother to be fine with the extra costs.
          3. Activities are usually already covered in the child support received.
          4. Unless mother doesn't want to be involved, it's hard to choose an activity which only you benefit from and expect her to pay extra.
          Last edited by StillPaying; 02-06-2022, 12:57 PM.

          Comment


          • #6
            Originally posted by StillPaying View Post
            I'm on mother's side.
            1. $40 per lesson twice a week is not beginners dance. It should be closer to $100 for 2.5 months.
            2. You say you can't afford it but expect mother to be fine with the extra costs.
            3. Activities are usually already covered in the child support received.
            4. Unless mother doesn't want to be involved, it's hard to choose an activity which only you benefit from and expect her to pay extra.
            I thought extracurricular activity were section 7?

            I understand your point though. Maybe I can find a cheaper option or just pay it myself to prevent any more conflict. This is the only extracurricular activity she is current interested in so I figured one activity would be reasonable to ask for sec. 7 support for.


            Also big mistake on my part. $40 a month, two days a week.

            Comment


            • #7
              Originally posted by Hide on Bush View Post
              Also big mistake on my part. $40 a month, two days a week.
              Both you and your ex are nuts if this is what you are quibbling over right now.

              You didn't enroll her in skydiving so when you send her into class it is not like sending her out of the door of a flying airplane. Just send her.

              Focus on the big stuff.

              Comment


              • #8
                Originally posted by pinkHouses View Post
                Both you and your ex are nuts if this is what you are quibbling over right now.

                You didn't enroll her in skydiving so when you send her into class it is not like sending her out of the door of a flying airplane. Just send her.

                Focus on the big stuff.
                Trying but I’m also trying to show I’m following the court order. Daughter wanted to do dance, I informed mother, she did not consent and as such won’t pay for her share.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by Hide on Bush View Post
                  I thought extracurricular activity were section 7?.
                  Unless it’s daycare, tutoring or school or previously agreed to, section 7 expenses must be agreed upon in advance. If she doesn’t want to pay, she can’t be forced. You would have to pay the cost yourself.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Originally posted by rockscan View Post
                    Unless it�s daycare, tutoring or school or previously agreed to, section 7 expenses must be agreed upon in advance. If she doesn�t want to pay, she can�t be forced. You would have to pay the cost yourself.
                    Does she have a right to refuse if it doesn’t cost her money nor affect her access in any way, shape, or form?

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      No if its your time and dime, she has no say. You can do what you want on your time.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Originally posted by rockscan View Post
                        No if its your time and dime, she has no say. You can do what you want on your time.
                        2-2-5 access schedule can help too. Monday/Tue with one parent always Wed/Thurs with the other. So you can schedule the activity on your time only and move on. Swimming, music instruction, dance, etc... Team sports are harder than individual sports and activities.

                        Comment

                        Our Divorce Forums
                        Forums dedicated to helping people all across Canada get through the separation and divorce process, with discussions about legal issues, parenting issues, financial issues and more.
                        Working...
                        X