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LF32 "need to see daughter" pt.2

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  • #91
    The good thing is we have 20 pages of people saying get a lawyer, the bad thing is they are long time readers of this thread....and probably have read 20 pages worth of explanations why there isn't a lawyer anymore

    But thanks again! Your input helps!

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    • #92
      Thanks Sidelines.... it's okay if he screws up and gets EOW.....right now all he's doing is going through the process

      Comment


      • #93
        I commend anyone who self-represents. The OP seems to be well-educated and intelligent enough to know if he needs to retain counsel.

        I don't see his current situation (receiving stupid letters from his ex's lawyer) as being a big set back. I've had a lawyer for past 5 years and my lawyer frequently receives inflammatory letters from the OC.

        High conflict lawyers are just that and could care less if the recipient of their letters is another lawyer or a self-represented litigant. They are just firing off the letters and billing their client.

        If the OP had a lawyer right now you can bet one of the lawyers would be initiating expensive 4-ways.
        Last edited by arabian; 06-26-2014, 09:39 PM. Reason: another thought

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        • #94
          Its quite emberassing to keep repeating but I'm in financial hardship, I rent, she took most things, my credit not so good. Last lawyer took me for a ride for $4,000 , refused to get me an EM and barely got my application in for that price. Please stop saying I " want" to take the chance. You dont think I want a lawyer in my corner? Really? I don't have the means...I have nothing to sell right now.

          I can di a monthly rate right now and am searching desperately for someone who can help. Self-repping is my only option until this happens. Please...I'm cognizant I need a lawyer.

          Comment


          • #95
            Originally posted by MrToronto View Post
            Thanks Sidelines.... it's okay if he screws up and gets EOW.....right now all he's doing is going through the process
            yes but its the process that leads to 50/50 or the EOW screw job. He screws up then trying to clean up the mess would be worse.

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            • #96
              Originally posted by standing on the sidelines View Post
              yes but its the process that leads to 50/50 or the EOW screw job. He screws up then trying to clean up the mess would be worse.
              100% correct and I couldn't agree more. This isn't a "WorkingDad" kind-of-situation nor is the OP a "WorkingDad" kind-of-self-represented-litigant.

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              • #97
                what exactly is the mess to clean up? From your experience Sidelines.

                The aftermath of Trials is a mess, everything's a mess in Court

                There is tons of people here with agreements and Final Orders made with Lawyers and there lives are still a mess

                So what mess is LF32 headed for?

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                • #98
                  Well then may be he can get some good help on this forum. I certainly don't know much about child custody, nor pretend to, but I do know he is trying his very best to simply get a fair deal. The Canadian justice system is supposed to be accessible to all. The OP is doing what he can to work his way through the process.

                  I commend him for this and hope he can find the strength to carry on. It seems he has done well todate and I hope this continues. Perhaps he can find a way to get some legal advice down the road when he gets to trial. All of these 'conferences' seem like elaborate positioning to me (likely very important).

                  Maybe if someone sees a blatant error in what he is doing they will alert him.

                  Comment


                  • #99
                    Originally posted by MrToronto View Post
                    what exactly is the mess to clean up? From your experience Sidelines.

                    The aftermath of Trials is a mess, everything's a mess in Court

                    There is tons of people here with agreements and Final Orders made with Lawyers and there lives are still a mess

                    So what mess ids LF32 headed for?
                    1. Failing to have any success on the motion.
                    2. Having a costs finding ordered against him that he cannot repay.
                    3. Having a costs order with a finding of bad faith that he cannot repay.
                    4. A judge identifying in an order / decision that on the balance of probabilities that the OP is the instigator of conflict.

                    There are a lot of bad things that can happen... Just take WorkingDad's case and look at it in reverse... All that bad can happen to the other party if they are arguing a bad case.

                    Good LUck!
                    Tayken

                    Comment


                    • Have a good evening all, and LF32 chat tomorrow

                      Comment


                      • Originally posted by Tayken View Post
                        1. Failing to have any success on the motion.
                        2. Having a costs finding ordered against him that he cannot repay.
                        3. Having a costs order with a finding of bad faith that he cannot repay.
                        4. A judge identifying in an order / decision that on the balance of probabilities that the OP is the instigator of conflict.

                        There are a lot of bad things that can happen... Just take WorkingDad's case and look at it in reverse... All that bad can happen to the other party if they are arguing a bad case.

                        Good LUck!
                        Tayken
                        Thanks for that Tayken

                        MrToronto, Don't you want LF32 to stand a chance to get at least 50/50? Its not your daughter so if he fails, it doesn't affect you at all. Some of us want him to succeed and we can see where he needs to get more experienced help.

                        Comment


                        • The other day, I was out for a walk, and there was a man lying on the side of the road, with a gunshot wound to the chest. I helpfully suggested that he seek medical attention immediately. Imagine my indignation when, instead of thanking me for my excellent advice, he merely opened up his mouth, coughed up some blood in lieu of forming words, and then closed his eyes. The nerve of that man. I gave him a perfectly reasonable suggestion, and he had the gall to die on me. I'm no doctor, so there is nothing I could have done to help him. Surely, he could have mustered up the strength to drag himself two blocks down the road to the nearest hospital. Why, if it wasn't for me suggesting that he go see a doctor, I'm sure that the thought would never have occurred to him. Honestly, why some people just don't go out and find a way to help themselves is completely beyond me.

                          I hope to god that I don't have to explain that previous paragraph to anyone, and that they get my point. Now, on to something constructive:

                          LF32, private message me your email address, and I will gladly send you what little money I can spare to help you out, no strings attached. I was fortunate to get 50-50 of my kids without having to fire a shot, and my ex and I never even used lawyers. Scratch that. I was damned lucky. The universe did me a favour, and I am more than happy to help return that favour. There are some folks giving you the best advice that they can give you like MrToronto, and I commend him. Then, there are some other folks that I shall decline to name who continually rub their lawyer suggestion in your face. I challenge them to either contribute something helpful to this forum, or donate money to you so that you can pay your legal bills. Failing that, I think that they should kindly stow it and find someone else to 'help'. Oh, and I'm dead serious about sending you money. It won't be a lot, but I've followed your story for a while now, and can't think of someone who could use a little extra help, more than you.

                          Comment


                          • Originally posted by Straittohell View Post
                            The other day, I was out for a walk, and there was a man lying on the side of the road, with a gunshot wound to the chest. I helpfully suggested that he seek medical attention immediately.
                            I do not see the parallel between your story and this forum at all. Your dramatic story is just that... Drama and there is no similarity. If this is how you argue your matter before a justice in family law it will get you nowhere.

                            The situations are in no way shape or form similar in nature.

                            Good Luck!
                            Tayken

                            Comment


                            • Originally posted by standing on the sidelines View Post
                              Thanks for that Tayken

                              MrToronto, Don't you want LF32 to stand a chance to get at least 50/50? Its not your daughter so if he fails, it doesn't affect you at all. Some of us want him to succeed and we can see where he needs to get more experienced help.
                              That is the challenge. These threads are not legal advice and I recommend and no one on this forum should play with someone's legal file as a testing ground for how to argue a matter.

                              The "advice" is faceless and from non-experts. It is dangerous to cheerlead someone who should really be seeking legal advice from experts. Even the most successful self-represented litigant ever to post on this forum consults a lawyer and pays to do so. But, that person's file speaks for itself...

                              Good Luck!
                              Tayken

                              Comment


                              • The parallel should have been apparent, but I will explain. In this forum, LF32 has been subjected to many people suggesting he get more legal help, despite him clearly indicating that he knows that he needs one, but cannot afford what he needs. In my parable, I suggested that a dying man seek medical attention when he clearly knew he needed it. In both cases, we have two people drowning in agony, and being offered little more than a suggestion that they acquire something that is beyond their reach.

                                I am not attempting argue my matter before a justice in family law, I am unsuccessfully pleading with people who apparently have far less empathy and mercy, to stop telling LF32 what he already knows. LF32 has received more than just 'amateur' procedural advice, he has received moral support, and an opportunity to vent, and has likely been given invaluable coaching about not losing shit and acting rashly. While not 'legal' advice, it certainly has value.

                                The second part of my message acknowledges that apart from moral support, (since I am no expert), the best I can offer is financial support, which I will gladly follow through on. It will be eminently more helpful than half a dozen posts insisting that he get a lawyer, since I am actually going to try and help give him the means to get one. Perhaps you should consider the same?

                                Comment

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