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  • Tools for divorced or separate parents

    Hi. My name is Ken. I am the father of a five year old boy. I am currently separated awaiting my divorce to be finalized. My relationship with my son's mother is okay but I noticed that many events in my son's life were falling through the cracks. I also hated talking to his mother on the phone or even having her email me. I went on-line to look for something to use to better organize his life but could never find exactly what I wanted. So I am working with some other divorced and separated parents on building something that will work for us. We would love your opinions. Check us out at *editted*

    Thx
    Last edited by blinkandimgone; 09-18-2012, 05:31 PM. Reason: Still soliciting....

  • #2
    Taking the emotion and bias out of parenting

    Hi. My name is Ken. I am the father of a five year old boy. I am currently separated awaiting my divorce to be finalized. My relationship with my son's mother is okay but I noticed that many events in my son's life were falling through the cracks. I also hated talking to his mother on the phone or even having her email me. I went on-line to look for something to use to better organize his life but could never find exactly what I wanted. So I am working with some other divorced and separated parents on building something that will work for us. We would love your opinions. Check us out at *editted*

    Thx

    ETA: Sorry Ken, we don't allow soliciting at ODF.

    Comment


    • #3
      You mean something like Our Family Wizard....


      [cough]spam[cough]

      Comment


      • #4
        Yes...except something that is much more user friendly...more mobile...and cheaper!

        Comment


        • #5
          Ken:

          If you think spamming this forum with stupid advertisements is going to get you clients...you can forget about it.

          I'm not buying anything from someone who posts 3 times in a row...its f'ing annoying.

          Once my agreement is finalized...I'll buy Our Family Wizard software. Its worth spending the money not to get spammed.

          Comment


          • #6
            I am NOT spamming you

            ...Sorry...didn't mean to bother you. I am just looking for feedback about the tool we are developing for separated and divorced parents.

            Comment


            • #7
              Ken if you were an active participating member of the forum here where we all without prejudice come to ask and answere inquiries you would have realized that regardless of which subforum all the posts appear at the higher level and will be seen by all who check the posts on the main board.

              If you have specific questions to which you need help with regarding your "5 year old son" - they may get resposes here in the spirit of this forum to help those willing to do the work.......

              Comment


              • #8
                I think it looks good, but its only a pamphlet at this point.

                It does not mention expense sharing, which would be good, especially for people with 50/50 that share more expenses.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by Ken Stewart View Post
                  So I am working with some other divorced and separated parents on building something that will work for us. We would love your opinions. Check us out at *ediitted*
                  Dear Ken:

                  Upon reviewing the front page of the website you have provided, there really isn't any functionality for which OurFamilyWizard.com or similar platforms really provides.

                  The one area that you do address which may be the only differentiating factor to your offering from OFW (and other similar systems) is:

                  One-Stop Parenting Plan

                  It can be a challenge getting both parents to work together on (and maintain) an effective parenting plan. Our templates help you and your ex-spouse build one as painlessly as possible. Everything from what time your child needs to go to bed, to how you agree to treat sensitive topics like religion can be suggested, negotiated and approved here. The best part? Your parenting plan will evolve as you and your child does!
                  Some feedback:

                  1. Parenting Plans are legal documents.

                  2. Parenting plans by definition should not include in my honest opinion details about "what time your child needs to go to bed" and/or "how you agree to treat sensitive topics like religion".

                  3. Even with an expert system driving the rules for which the elements of a parenting plan are governed by in accordance with the Jurisdictional Rules/Act (i.e. Family Law Rules, Children's Law Reform Act, etc). This is no small feat to make a cogent parenting plan that could be court enforceable.

                  4. Much of what goes into a "real" enforcable parenting plan is highly subjective. This makes overcoming the challenge of "automating" the process difficult. What Rules govern goes into a parenting plan? A quick evaluation of case law on CanLII will quickly demonstrate the completely subjective and resulting objective Rulings.

                  5. The terminology (ontology) that you use in your correspondence such as "ex-spouse" has a negative connotation in general. You may want to consider having a qualified mental health worker assist in the development of the platform to normalize the vocabulary of divorce in to less conflictual terms.

                  6. Unless the "parenting plan" system is being reviewed by a mediator and/or arbitrator any results of the system which produces the "parenting plan" is non-binding. If you integrated and had mediators avalible to parents to discuss the matter and guide them through putting together a proper parenting plan that could eventually become an order would be more valuable. For example, virtual conferences with qualified mediators and arbitrators to guide and assist matters.

                  7. The vast complexity of the FLR, CLRA and jurisprudence of case law would need to be considered by both parties to the agreement. My recommendation would be to focus on an integrated system where by professionals could interact directly with the parents involved in the matter in a more "collaborative law" format. I highly recommend you read the book Welcome to Cooperative Solutions: A better way to resolve conflicts through mediation and training in Toronto and the GTA. "Family Mediation, Arbitration and Collaborative Practice Handbook, 5th Edition" when considering the functionality and *usability* of this component. As well as possibly building the core business model for this component on New ways for families.

                  8. Investigate the evolving markets in Telehealth and how clinicians are being connected to clients. You would be better off developing a solution that connects clients and professionals in support of a collaborative methodology. But, these professionals would need to be paid for their time and involvement of course.

                  9. If you could figure out how to merge the concepts of points #7 and #8 you could possibly be very successful and would be providing a service outside the scope of general tools already established in the market space and that have already been ordered by the courts.

                  For example from:

                  Izyuk v. Bilousov, 2011 ONSC 6451 (CanLII)
                  Date: 2011-11-09
                  Docket: F-2172/09
                  URL: http://canlii.ca/t/fnr57
                  OUR FAMILY WIZARD

                  481. The Respondent proposed a creative solution to deal with communication problems between the parties: An interactive website known as Our Family Wizard. He explained that at a cost of about $100.00 per year for each parent, they can use the various functions of Our Family Wizard to exchange written communications, address timesharing, schedule medical appointments, coordinate purchases and section 7 contributions -- even exchange photographs of the child. He cited court decisions in which this computer program has been endorsed.

                  482. He acknowledged no communication mode can overcome mistrust and animosity. But he suggested that because Our Family Wizard maintains a permanent record of everything either party says, the format encourages child-focussed discussions, and discourages negative or destructive comments.
                  Finally, your site information doesn't address "accountability" as a third party service provider to both parents and the court.

                  Question: How would your solution allow someone apply the methodology found in this detailed guide on building a parenting plan?

                  http://www.albertacourts.ab.ca/famil...planissues.pdf

                  Good Luck!
                  Tayken
                  Last edited by blinkandimgone; 09-18-2012, 05:32 PM. Reason: removed website address

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Originally posted by Tayken View Post
                    "how you agree to treat sensitive topics like religion".
                    IMO, unless the parenting plan put forth determines custody, speaking to religion is completely inappropriate. Religion, health and education are decisions provided for in custody.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by HammerDad View Post
                      IMO, unless the parenting plan put forth determines custody, speaking to religion is completely inappropriate. Religion, health and education are decisions provided for in custody.
                      Which is the complexity of a parenting plan. It needs to, in my opinion, identify custody and access. Religion is an element of custody. Parenting plans are incredibly complex in many cases to simplify.

                      There are already excellent tools out there for putting together parenting plans. Automating them becomes challenging because it is a very "subjective" agreement between parents that is rooted in concrete statements. There are thousands (if not millions) of expert Rules that would have to taught to the system to deal with it.

                      Expert systems as a whole for the general population of average users (or uneducated users) is no small task to take on. Especially when considering the massive amount of variability in a parenting plan. The system would have to be primarily be driven by a large evidence model for which would take significant design and consideration to put in place.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Originally posted by Ken Stewart View Post
                        Hi. My name is Ken. I am the father of a five year old boy. I am currently separated awaiting my divorce to be finalized. My relationship with my son's mother is okay but I noticed that many events in my son's life were falling through the cracks. I also hated talking to his mother on the phone or even having her email me. I went on-line to look for something to use to better organize his life but could never find exactly what I wanted. So I am working with some other divorced and separated parents on building something that will work for us. We would love your opinions. Check us out at *edited*

                        Thx
                        Personally Ken, I don't have a problem with you and your other divorced parents asking for some feedback here on your endeavour. I would say focus less on the marketing questions and more on what the real issues are for the children and parents caught in a legal jungle.

                        You might have received a better welcome in this forum if you had done a little more research here, because there is a ton to do as has already been pointed out.

                        Find your niche, provide a real service, and over perform. Good luck.
                        Last edited by blinkandimgone; 09-18-2012, 05:34 PM. Reason: removed website address

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Although you can't solicit here, it would be an interesting discussion, I think, to find out why on earth you would want to take the emotion out of parenting?

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                          • #14
                            Good point. I believe the term emotion needs to be better defined. What the tool is hoping to reduce is negative emotion...any emotion one parent still has for another that then impacts their decisions on how to raise their child.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              No tool will ever do that. Maturity and respect does. That also has absolutely nothing to do with the child - or shouldn't. If you aren't mature enough to make decisions in the best interest of the child because of your feelings for the other parent, then perhaps it's time to re-evaluate whether or not you're the best fit as a parent for that child.

                              Comment

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