Fairly new separation (6 months). We have an interim agreement of shared 50/50 custody in a nesting arrangement. 3 kids. Ex has just recently gotten apartment with 3 other adults for her off weeks away from the house and kids. She has only had them there one weekend so far but plans to make this the norm for her weekends. The nesting arrangement will end 2-3 months at which point I will be moving into an apartment and she will continue with her current one.
My son, 12, has clearly expressed that he does not want to live with ex at this apartment and would much rather stay with me on her weekends. He does not like her apartment, roommates, new parenting figures and their lifestyle. D9 and D7 are fine with the situation at this point.
I've encouraged him to give it a good chance but he is very adamant that he does not want it at all. I realize that transition, especially to a very different lifestyle, can be difficult for any child. I expressed his concerns (he asked me to) to my ex and she was aware of them and had spoken at length with him about it. She said she had told him that he is old enough to decide with which parent he prefers to live and that she would not be changing her lifestyle to suit him.
It's her weekend coming up and she's said that he is welcome to stay with me instead. I am a bit wary of her accusing me of discouraging her time with him (which I haven't done in any way) and at the same time I do want them to have time together. I am also concerned about D12 and his sisters having less time together.
I guess I'm just wondering if and how to proceed with my son's wishes.
My son, 12, has clearly expressed that he does not want to live with ex at this apartment and would much rather stay with me on her weekends. He does not like her apartment, roommates, new parenting figures and their lifestyle. D9 and D7 are fine with the situation at this point.
I've encouraged him to give it a good chance but he is very adamant that he does not want it at all. I realize that transition, especially to a very different lifestyle, can be difficult for any child. I expressed his concerns (he asked me to) to my ex and she was aware of them and had spoken at length with him about it. She said she had told him that he is old enough to decide with which parent he prefers to live and that she would not be changing her lifestyle to suit him.
It's her weekend coming up and she's said that he is welcome to stay with me instead. I am a bit wary of her accusing me of discouraging her time with him (which I haven't done in any way) and at the same time I do want them to have time together. I am also concerned about D12 and his sisters having less time together.
I guess I'm just wondering if and how to proceed with my son's wishes.
Comment