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  • #16
    no there isn't yet. my lawyer advised me to start paying once the papers were submitted to the courts.

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    • #17
      Originally posted by vocircuspants View Post
      no there isn't yet. my lawyer advised me to start paying once the papers were submitted to the courts.
      Why would you do that?

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      • #18
        Originally posted by vocircuspants View Post
        My wife wants to co-share the house and car, one week on, one week off (nesting) until the house sells (she's currently housesitting elsewhere). She's demanding I pay all monthly house and car expenses and pay her full child and spousal support during this time. She says she'll contribute to monthly expenses by doing some house renos and using child support to feed the kids during her weeks (which she'd have to be doing anyways, whether in her own place or with me). Does this sound right? She gets free rent, mortgage and everything paid by me and everything else.
        If she completes house renovations she will then insist that she receives more of the equity from a sale of the home. I would insist on 50% split on everything and stay in the house till she agrees to place it on the market.

        Start getting all,your financials organized. It seems in your situation its a 50/50 split on everything so working out your financial situation is important. Suggest you set up a household account and contribute equally into that account to cover all household expenses.

        Sure once you finally have an agreement you may well be paying some sort of CS and SS but until then just be fair and share the expenses.

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        • #19
          If I were you I would negotiate as much as possible before the lawyers get fully involved:

          If you have kids and she didn't work she'll get spousal support.
          If I were you I'd give spousal but get an end date.

          Do a math calculation for child + spousal = X
          then deduct the cost of housing etc.... and offer to pay her the difference.

          Might even be better to pay her spousal support and in lieu of child support say you are paying the mortgage or something then you can deduct the spousal support in your taxes.

          Do NOT leave the house, and establish a week in - week out routine with the kids. Just because she is unemployed don't let her leverage that to become the custodial parent.

          Ignore the vacations for now but note that in court you can see that instead of seeking work she was going on vacations .

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          • #20
            My lawyer says that because she has no income, as an interim measure the judge will likely side with her and give her the house. She's offering to deduct $400 from spousal/child support while staying at the house. Might be the best I can get for now

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            • #21
              Originally posted by vocircuspants View Post
              My lawyer says that because she has no income, as an interim measure the judge will likely side with her and give her the house. She's offering to deduct $400 from spousal/child support while staying at the house. Might be the best I can get for now
              And you quote

              “All joint tenants, tenants in common, and coparceners, all doweresses, and parties entitled to dower, tenants by the curtesy, mortgagees or other creditors having liens on, and all parties interested in, to or out of, any land in Ontario, may be compelled to make or suffer partition or sale of the land, or any part thereof, whether the estate is legal and equitable or equitable only.”


              Partition Act, R.S.O. 1990, c. P.4, s.2.

              2. A joint tenant has a prima facie right to the sale of the Home.

              Pagnanelli v. Pagnanelli [2002] O.J. No. 2705 (Ont. S.C.J.) at para 8.[See Tab 8 of Book of Authorities]

              3. The loss of a right to buy-out the other spouse’s interest in the home, is not a basis upon which to deny a sale. “ ‘An application by a joint tenant for sale should only be refused if the application is vexatious or malicious’ ”.

              Ibid. at para 10.

              4. In Cox v. Adibfar, Benot J. stated with respect to an interim motion for the sale of the Matrimonial Home:

              “The matrimonial home is an issue that has sabotaged the orderly resolution of the case. It has less to do with the best interests of the children than it has to do with the tactical manoeuvres in the litigation. All of the facts, taken together, demonstrate that the house has obtained a false significance. It is viewed as a prize that one will win and the other will loose. The ages of the children, their daily routine and their lifestyle do not require that this house be preserved. The sale of the house, in this particular case, is an inevitable result of the separation. The sale, which has been delayed for over a year, should proceed.”

              Cox v. Adibfar, [2000] O.J. No. 2238 (Ont. S.C.J.) at para 16. [See Tab 9 of Book of Authorities]
              Might be time for a new lawyer?????


              DO NOT MOVE OUT OF THAT HOUSE....EVEN FOR ONE DAY....SHE CANNOT MAKE YOU LEAVE UNLESS SHE GETS AN ORDER FOR EXCLUSIVE POSSESSION

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              • #22
                My lawyer says that because she has no income, as an interim measure the judge will likely side with her and give her the house. She's offering to deduct $400 from spousal/child support while staying at the house. Might be the best I can get for now
                I don't know much about nesting arrangements but the couple instances that I've heard of...I'm not a fan. Its almost like its trying to give the kids the illusion that nothing has changed and it handicaps the parents from moving on with their lives in separate residences. Not to mention all the little particulars...who maintains, who cleans, moving in and out, the property left at the house, etc.

                There's two possibilities here...1. That she now has an advantage because she's not earning an income and you've proved by the nesting arrangement that you can afford to pay for the marital home and still afford to live elsewere. (unlikely).

                ...or 2. Your lawyer is giving you bad advice. (more likely)

                She is probably going to be able to prove entitlement to SS but until she does, you shouldn't be paying her. Particularly if you're already picking up the expenses on the marital home. She can't have it both ways.

                Personally, I think you need another lawyer and you need to start immediate action to get an access agreement in place and ask to have the home dispositioned. In the interim, I'm not sure why the judge would do anything different than what you're doing right now. You already have a nesting arrangement established. If your lawyer is saying that she'll get the house that you have to pay for and SS...I don't see how that's possible.

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                • #23
                  Originally posted by vocircuspants View Post
                  That's what I thought but she has me thinking I'm going crazy.
                  How/Why are you allowing your EX (of all people) influence you enough for you to doubt yourself?

                  That's the first problem you need to deal with. Cut the cord, man!

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                  • #24
                    Originally posted by wretchedotis View Post
                    How/Why are you allowing your EX (of all people) influence you enough for you to doubt yourself?

                    That's the first problem you need to deal with. Cut the cord, man!
                    agreed, i have for the most part. she just says the craziest shit

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                    • #25
                      @FB_ i have no idea what that legalese means.

                      if it makes any difference, I'm in Quebec.

                      staying in house is until house sells, hopefully summer.

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                      • #26
                        Originally posted by vocircuspants View Post
                        @FB_ i have no idea what that legalese means.

                        if it makes any difference, I'm in Quebec.

                        staying in house is until house sells, hopefully summer.
                        This is from Ontario so it may not be useful. Not sure of the laws in Quebec.

                        Basically it says that as a co-owner you have the right of sale.

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                        • #27
                          if it makes any difference, I'm in Quebec.
                          It makes a big difference but I think it makes a difference that's more in your favor.

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                          • #28
                            I wish there was a forum like this for us Quebecers (in English)

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                            • #29
                              If there was enough interest maybe the owner of the forum would consider a section for Quebec? I would find it interesting to read.

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