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  • Deciding What School

    So it's that time of year to decide what school the 4 year old child will start JK in Ontario, full day every day school.

    How do divorced parents decide when the agreement says "they will decide and agree together when it is time for registration"?

    If both parents live in separate school districts and are not willing to move their residence and agree on the school in one parents zone, how would it be decided?

    Can enforcement be made for a neutral school outside of both parents zones?

  • #2
    The child's school district will be determined by their primary address and they will attend a school mutually agreed upon within that district.

    In order to register outside of their district you must apply for a cross boundary transfer from the school boards which is not easy to get.

    What has been declared as their primary address, your address or hers?

    Comment


    • #3
      there is no primary address. kid shared custody schedule with both parents. Drop off times are at 8am for dad and pickup after work at 5pm at moms.

      Mom works 2 days a week, other 3 days can pickup at school at 2:30pm

      Comment


      • #4
        Shared custody or not, a primary address must be declared for the kids - for exactly these reasons. Schools, recreation sports etc are based on kid's primary address.

        Comment


        • #5
          how is primary address declared? Especially in shared access schedules.

          Comment


          • #6
            This thread discusses primary address:

            http://www.ottawadivorce.com/forum/f...esidence-9917/

            Essentially, both of you would have to agree but given that you cannot currently agree this will likely be difficult for the two of you to reach an agreement on. You will need to consider things like where do you want the kids to play sports? Where is their daycare? Where are they most involved in the community? What schools are available in each community and how do they rank?

            f you cannot agree you could file a motion with the court to determine, but it seems that would be extreme. Perhaps mediation...?

            Comment


            • #7
              I think you agree on it.......lol

              barring that, a judge will decide really, in which case he will apply as any logical person best interests of the child.

              Originally posted by Canadaguy View Post
              how is primary address declared? Especially in shared access schedules.

              Comment


              • #8
                Upon reaching school age, true shared custody is a challenge to maintain if the child resides equally in two different school districts. I don't think you can have a child attend a school in a district in which neither parent lives.

                Ultimately, you and your ex will have to come to an agreement, or go to court and let a judge decide.

                Some things to consider:

                Which school is better quality? Where will the child receive the best education?
                Would one of the parents consider moving to the other school district?
                Are there any half-siblings or step-siblings who would be attending one of the schools?
                If the daycare will be providing before and after school care, in which school district is this daycare located?
                If the child has a good friend who lives near one of the homes, which school would that friend attend?
                Which school makes the most sense for the child to be able to access new friends during non-school hours?
                Which school would involve the shorter bus ride?
                Which parent is more likely to be able to come get the child in an emergency?
                Which high school would the child attend after finishing at this elementary school? Where is it located?

                Answer all those questions, and you may find that one school choice becomes the obvious one.

                Comment


                • #9
                  mediation is not an option, the other parent will not agree to mediation as it is not binding. that only leaves arbitration and court.

                  the problem is the matrimonal house was sold last year and neither of us live in the school district that the kid goes to daycare in (daycare is at a school).

                  So I could move to the daycare school zone and request that be the school or she could request they go to school in her new residential school zone.

                  Flip a coin or is it one sided because she will be picking and drop off at school? Will me moving to the daycare zone prevent her from switching daycares?

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    How far apart are your residences?

                    Why are YOU so opposed to the child attending school near her place?

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      her residence is 25 km from my apartment and 30 km from where we use to live. My apartment is a few km's from the current daycare. The school she wants to enrol in is a few km's from her house (walk to school).

                      So we use to live a few km's apart, now we live about 25 km's apart. Her work is near my house and my work is mid way between her house and my apartment.

                      I am opposed to attending her school becauase it is so far away from my current place and still about 15 km from my work. I would like a school closer to my work so I don't have to drive 30 minutes a day out of my way.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Here's the thing: you are focused on what is convenient for you, rather than what is best for the kid. And this "issue" is not even worth the hassle the two of you are making out of it.

                        Where you used to live is irrelevant - none of you live there anymore and never will again. It is the same distance from her place to yours as it is from yours to hers: roughly 20 minutes - which is nothing. If your child were riding the school bus they would likely spend a minimum of 30 - 45 minutes on the bus each way - which the schools and school boards don't seem to feel is unreasonable for children.

                        Her reasons for not wanting it are the same as yours, if you both dig in your heels you will make no progress over what is, essentially, a non-issue.

                        Go spend some time researching the schools and the community and make a decision for your child based on THAT information - not yours or her convenience. If you find it "out of your way" to go get your child, then perhaps switch your schedule so that you don't have to. Or just get used to it being a part of parenting - your kid is JUST starting out in school, you have many more years of doing this so might as well suck it up now. Just think of all the quality one-on-one time you get to have with the kid in the car talking about how his/her day went!

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          I agree but she has dug her heels in and will not agree to any other school other than hers. She said if I have an issue with it to move closer. That is an option, but why should I have to move closer because she says so?

                          I would rather move myself (since I am renting) to a school on the way to her work that is in a great community, new and great for the kid so it is not inconvinent for her but more convinent for me and then our kid can walk to the school from my house.

                          It would be more driving for her than her school which is why she won't agree to it.

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Originally posted by Canadaguy View Post
                            I agree but she has dug her heels in and will not agree to any other school other than hers. She said if I have an issue with it to move closer. That is an option, but why should I have to move closer because she says so?

                            I would rather move myself (since I am renting) to a school on the way to her work that is in a great community, new and great for the kid so it is not inconvinent for her but more convinent for me and then our kid can walk to the school from my house.

                            It would be more driving for her than her school which is why she won't agree to it.
                            So agree to her choice of school in exchange for a concession from her about something else. Negotiate. Maybe get her to pay your moving expenses if you can't think of anything. She has to recognize that this would be better than court, right? Then pick a new home right up next to the school so you are the most available parent. If you can pick a place that's also closer to the future high school, that's even better.

                            Or move right up next to the current daycare and school so the child can stay in the same neighbourhood. Your ex would have a lot harder time fighting to change from what was the original school plan when you were together.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              There is a house for sale across the street from hers...I could buy that one but would feel it would not be best for the kid knowing that mom and dad live walking distance apart. Plus I know I don't want to live that close to her nor does she want to live that close to me.

                              Comment

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