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  • How to choose a lawyer

    Hi all,
    so this is where I am at
    Husband and I split last year after he was arrested. I got a lawyer through Legal Aid (I was not working at the time). we went through all the details of my case and she explained how she would approach my case, she sounded promising and her charges were reasonable. She barely did anything and kept procrastinating. Needed more time to get this and that and prepare for this and that. Wasted a lot of time and money on email and phone communication with the other side as opposed to taking steps to move in a direction and get things started in court. We only did original application with her for child and spousal support and child care expenses. I got a job then and no longer qualified for legal aid.
    I then retained a lawyer, who said who would do this and that, but would require XX amount, toward the higher end of the charge spectrum. HE gave me an estimate for a motion. I got the money together and retained him. HE only did Reply to the response, and went through mine and ex's disclosure and all the retainer money was gone. Original estimate he gave for fast motion, also went up to almost 2X because he said he needed to go through the disclosure one more time just before the motion. I wasn't not happy with how the money that was to last till the end of the motion was all gone even before he filed for motion. Although I did like his aggressive style with the opposing party.
    So I decided to go on my own. I did one case conference and got an order against ex to provide all the disclosure.
    The when and how the access should take place as presented by ex was impossible for me, so I was able to convince the judge for a more reasonable and workable schedule.
    It has now been more than a year, and no issue has been settled. I want to retain a lawyer to get things moving, as fast as possible. specially regarding Custody, Child Support and Section 7 expenses. But I am afraid of hiring someone and getting burnt again.
    Can some one suggest a lawyer they have had experience with. Someone who is result oriented, aggressive enough, and not put up with delaying tactics of the other side. Just to mention once again, it has been a year and no order or support agreement in place.

    Thanks
    BTW I live in Mississauga, and willing to retain lawyer from Mississauga or Brampton

  • #2
    Lawyers are expensive. There is no such thing as a cheap lawyer.

    The court system takes a freaking long time.

    A lawyer has to review the material and use it all collectively to analyze all the facts and give you the best legal advice.

    I think that Oink has some great advice. At least some great points to mull over in considering your options.

    Comment


    • #3
      Thanks for the suggestion, Oink. I am working fulltime and preparing for the case conference and motion, took everything out of me. Dealing with ex was pretty bad, but dealing with his lawyer was even worst. When the judge told us to go out and try to discuss or settle issues while he dealt with other cases. My ex starting swearing at me and my family and his lawyer just smiled at him. I know they were trying to rattle me and get a rise out of me, it took every ounce of strength to not to let it get to me too much. I don’t want to go through that again.
      Plus, I had used help from lawyers at the safe center to help put the paper work together. There were still technical issues that even they overlooked; as a result some of my evidence was the kind of material that as the judge told me was not supposed to be filed. Because of that the judge refused to look at my entire affidavit and exhibits for fast motion. So I was left with arguing my case without any supporting documentation. I am now fighting for sole custody, child support plus child care expenses, I don’t want to take a chance with these issue.

      Comment


      • #4
        Originally posted by oink View Post
        Awww..thank you sugarlips. Please let it be known that I did not pay you to say this
        And you know that Serene is male.....

        Comment


        • #5
          Originally posted by marivana View Post
          Hi all,
          so this is where I am at
          Husband and I split last year after he was arrested. I got a lawyer through Legal Aid (I was not working at the time). we went through all the details of my case and she explained how she would approach my case, she sounded promising and her charges were reasonable. She barely did anything and kept procrastinating. Needed more time to get this and that and prepare for this and that. Wasted a lot of time and money on email and phone communication with the other side as opposed to taking steps to move in a direction and get things started in court. We only did original application with her for child and spousal support and child care expenses. I got a job then and no longer qualified for legal aid.
          I then retained a lawyer, who said who would do this and that, but would require XX amount, toward the higher end of the charge spectrum. HE gave me an estimate for a motion. I got the money together and retained him. HE only did Reply to the response, and went through mine and ex's disclosure and all the retainer money was gone. Original estimate he gave for fast motion, also went up to almost 2X because he said he needed to go through the disclosure one more time just before the motion. I wasn't not happy with how the money that was to last till the end of the motion was all gone even before he filed for motion. Although I did like his aggressive style with the opposing party.
          So I decided to go on my own. I did one case conference and got an order against ex to provide all the disclosure.
          The when and how the access should take place as presented by ex was impossible for me, so I was able to convince the judge for a more reasonable and workable schedule.
          It has now been more than a year, and no issue has been settled. I want to retain a lawyer to get things moving, as fast as possible. specially regarding Custody, Child Support and Section 7 expenses. But I am afraid of hiring someone and getting burnt again.
          Can some one suggest a lawyer they have had experience with. Someone who is result oriented, aggressive enough, and not put up with delaying tactics of the other side. Just to mention once again, it has been a year and no order or support agreement in place.

          Thanks
          BTW I live in Mississauga, and willing to retain lawyer from Mississauga or Brampton
          PM Me, I can recommend my ex's lawyer as someone who was very agressive and persistent, if thats what you want. Personally she was abusive but effective.

          Comment


          • #6
            Nope. I'm female. Authentic and sexy female parts!

            Comment


            • #7
              I lived through 2 years of abuse, only because we have children together. For the sake of our girls, I didn't say a word. Then he started getting physically violent. My family and his friends got involved, tried to reason with him, but nothing helped. When he became violent in front of our girls, I couldn't take it anymore. I was willing to put up with everything for the sake of our girls, but when he exposed them to violence I drew the line and called the police. As a result, he was arrested, criminal charges were laid against him, and CAS got involved. Now he can't forgive me, he blames me for the humiliation he has suffered by spending a night in Jail.
              He is so angry now that it has become impossible to discuss anything with him. Every time I have tried to talk to him he started swearing at me, so now all communication between us takes place through CAS. Plus, there is a no contact order between us.
              In this situation, any decision that needs to be made regarding our daughters becomes extremely long and difficult. Just to have him get orthotics for our older daughter (fully covered by his insurance) took 1 year.
              I have always informed him of every decision, or appointment or illness, in short everything regarding our daughters through the CAS. I have never alienated him from the children or vice versa, or prevent access or turn the children against him. I just don't want to have to go through fighting with him every step of the way, when it comes to our children. I want to break this cycle where he holds control over me through our children.

              Comment


              • #8
                Originally posted by marivana View Post
                I lived through 2 years of abuse, only because we have children together. For the sake of our girls, I didn't say a word. Then he started getting physically violent. My family and his friends got involved, tried to reason with him, but nothing helped. When he became violent in front of our girls, I couldn't take it anymore. I was willing to put up with everything for the sake of our girls, but when he exposed them to violence I drew the line and called the police. As a result, he was arrested, criminal charges were laid against him, and CAS got involved. Now he can't forgive me, he blames me for the humiliation he has suffered by spending a night in Jail.
                He is so angry now that it has become impossible to discuss anything with him. Every time I have tried to talk to him he started swearing at me, so now all communication between us takes place through CAS. Plus, there is a no contact order between us.
                In this situation, any decision that needs to be made regarding our daughters becomes extremely long and difficult. Just to have him get orthotics for our older daughter (fully covered by his insurance) took 1 year.
                I have always informed him of every decision, or appointment or illness, in short everything regarding our daughters through the CAS. I have never alienated him from the children or vice versa, or prevent access or turn the children against him. I just don't want to have to go through fighting with him every step of the way, when it comes to our children. I want to break this cycle where he holds control over me through our children.
                I understand where you are coming from, and indeed abuse is one area which may sway a judge to give you sole custody.

                It is difficult to enforce some things without the right tools. I can imagine the frustration around orthotics, but it isn't worth going to court for. Depending on how your agreement is worded, the FRO could enforce some S7 things like daycare and so on. The fact that his insurance would pay for it means there is more to this than money.

                You could try and get your agreement amended to be more specific on these things, but it would cost $$. And knowing how unco-operative he is, he would force you to take it to court.

                I conceded thousands of dollars in equalization simply because court would cost me more. You have to ask yourself whether the time and effort are worth it.

                I would also hope you seek counselling.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Fyi

                  by section 7 expenses I was only thinking about the day care cost for our girls, one is in daycare full day, the other only after school. But thank you for bringing up the point about orthotics, completely escaped me.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    OP, have a look at this, OrleansLawyer mentioned them a while ago.

                    JusticeNet :: Home

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      After many instances where I could not get my ex to submit insurance claims, mortgage statements, proportionate contributions, feedback, etc. I now have S7s collected by FRO built into my divorce order.

                      This amount was calculated by taking the amount spent in what we could justify as recurring S7 expenses for the previous year. This amount was averaged out over 12 months into equal instalments. May 1st of each year this amount is to be adjusted.

                      I'm still waiting for the ex to disclose his 2012 financials. The way I see it, it is not worth the money to fight this in court. If is stated in my order that parents, if any, are to be retroactive.

                      It is no where an ideal situation in my opinion but is without a doubt the least evil alternative for me.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        If you need hand-holding, like to send frequent emails and demand an immediate return to your calls or emails. .....you will pay for it.

                        If you have little or no knowledge of family law and how it works in your province..... you will pay for that advice because your meetings with your lawyer will take longer had you educated yourself on basic rules of court, family law matters, etc.

                        If you like the idea of meeting with your ex and your two respective lawyers frequently to "just discuss" things.... you will pay dearly for this (same or more than for trial attendances by your lawyer - best to get a quote ahead of time).

                        If you never want to settle and want to go to court.... you will pay for this.


                        All comes down to how you want to play the game. High drama = high costs.


                        More lawyers, more letters, more meetings.... most cost to you (win or lose).

                        Comment

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