Originally posted by Elomelo8387
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Undue Hardship and High Access Costs
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Is there some more detail you can provide?
Why is this happening now?
How long have you lived in another city?
What precipitated the move?
Was there any agreement before?
Is there an underlying circumstance that has caused this to come up?
Has he ever expressed an issue before?
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Unless they addressed all the issues, their lack of agreement goes both ways. I believe his "consent" would hinder a custody change but not a hardship one. There is obviously high access costs here (~$10k/yr), and ex shouldn't be stuck with it due to mother's move. It may not be much, and certainly no more than his actual costs, but it's my guess he'll either get cs reduced or s.7 costs would be offset due to access costs.
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Originally posted by rockscan View PostIs there some more detail you can provide?
Why is this happening now?
How long have you lived in another city?
What precipitated the move?
Was there any agreement before?
Is there an underlying circumstance that has caused this to come up?
Has he ever expressed an issue before?
I have been separated over 2 1/2 years now and living separately from him.
No agreement was in place before. When we had to sort the issues and tried to make a SA all the issues began.
This was not an issue before. He has a high standard of living and wants all these luxuries. He realized CS gave him a dent and then started looking for ways to reduce it
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Also I wasn’t getting CS for a while. It’s only been a recent phenomenon. Even section 7 he isn’t paying (ie childcare) so it’s been a hardship for me. But that’s another issues.
Regardless I will try to be amicable about it and if he’s still going to hardball me I think it might make more sense to just have a judge decide. I have been receiving threat letters for undue hardship for months now and He still needs to file a motion.
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He sounds like a bully. Often if you are “amicable” and flexible they just use it as an excuse to treat you worse and worse (as you can see from the unpaid CS and S7). You have never denied him access even when he was not paying CS so you look golden before a judge.
Going to court you aren’t going to get less than Table CS, and you’ll get S7, and he can’t increase parenting time due to the mutually agreed distance and status quo.
Self-repping isn’t hard on financial issues. You might want to call legal aid for advice (they are being flexible about income limits due to Covid). A clearly written letter May make things easier for you, failing that, launching an application in the court (you mentioned him threatening a motion but it sounds like neither of you have even done an application, if so, he doesn’t know what he is talking about).
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