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  • #31
    Originally posted by rockscan View Post
    CS is the right of the child so they can claim whatever they want. A judge sees it as the child�s money and if he is making more, he should be paying more.
    Is back child support on the same grounds? My ex owes about $10,000 in back child support...

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    • #32
      Originally posted by rockscan View Post
      CS is the right of the child so they can claim whatever they want. A judge sees it as the child�s money and if he is making more, he should be paying more.
      I can't wait for these words to be more than just words.
      For s7 expenses this holds true but for the table amount it is simply income for a parent and all they must do is ensure the most basic of needs are met.


      One can go back as far as 8 years I think but also may not get it unless they have a good reason or are proactive. A couple of years may not be an issue.

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      • #33
        Yes. He should have updated as soon as his income changed or at least on an annual basis when he received his notice of assessment. He hasnt been acting in good faith.

        Now that he is playing this game of harassing your son to get him to do what he wants, he is demonstrating poor behaviour in that way.

        He isnt making himself look good at any rate. Dont take what his lawyer says as gospel. He instructs his lawyer and the lawyer is an asshole on his behalf.

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        • #34
          Originally posted by Hide on Bush View Post
          Right now I'm worried that if I don't get the courts involved then nothing is going to change between my son and my ex's relationship. Further, I believe my ex will file for contempt because my son wont go with my ex which is against the current order.
          Just my opinion....you are trying way to hard on this and it is looking a little weird maybe controlling.
          Due diligence has already been done and either your ex is going to step up or not; you can't control what they do.

          Comment


          • #35
            Originally posted by pinkHouses View Post
            Just my opinion....you are trying way to hard on this and it is looking a little weird maybe controlling.
            Due diligence has already been done and either your ex is going to step up or not; you can't control what they do.
            I can understand the controlling aspect, and that is more around because my ex refuses to do anything and I am in the position where their blame is going to placed on me because I have sole decision-making, and my son lives with me and spends the large majority of the time with me. I just want to make sure my basis are covered if this does go in front of a judge.

            Originally posted by pinkHouses View Post
            One can go back as far as 8 years I think but also may not get it unless they have a good reason or are proactive. A couple of years may not be an issue.
            The $10,000 owed in CS is just for the past 2-3 years. The current payments for child support are based on an income reported back in 2019. Each year since then he has made drastically more.

            Currently, I have offered various things including the most recent offer for my ex to conduct therapy with my son. If he is unwilling to do that, once I receive the motion date I have prepared:

            Form 14: Notice of Motion

            Form 14C: Confirmation of Motion

            Factum (30 pages)

            Form 14A: Affidavit - Steps taking to resolve this matter (with supporting documentation as exhibits)

            Form 14A: Affidavit - History of this occurrence (background, CAS involvement, allegations of animal abuse to allegations to emotional abuse, to my son claiming he was suicidal, to now when my son is starting to refuse to go)

            Form 14A: Affidavit - All time my ex has missed as a result of this with an explanation on why for each matter (with supporting documentation as exhibit)

            Remember I am self-repped and I'm not sure what I really need to have a strong case so I compiled more then I may need (or not enough) which is why I am always open to suggestions.
            Last edited by Hide on Bush; 04-28-2022, 09:53 AM.

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            • #36
              The supreme court says 3 years. If he didnt update when his income went up by 100 grand then hes definitely in the wrong.

              Getting an agreement done isnt controlling. If anything, sitting outside your house and the school is controlling and intimidating behaviour on his part.

              If anything you are impatient.

              Comment


              • #37
                Originally posted by rockscan View Post
                The supreme court says 3 years. If he didnt update when his income went up by 100 grand then hes definitely in the wrong.

                Getting an agreement done isnt controlling. If anything, sitting outside your house and the school is controlling and intimidating behaviour on his part.

                If anything you are impatient.
                Would an alteration in CS be classified as a simple procedural matter that can be done through a 14B Motion if OP doesn't consent as it is based on the table amount? If so, would back child support also classify as that as well?

                Would it be a reasonable offer to consent to my ex using the back child support to pay for the cost of therapy between my son and my ex.
                Last edited by Hide on Bush; 04-28-2022, 09:57 AM.

                Comment


                • #38
                  Thats not an unreasonable request (the back support for therapy). You can amend your pleadings to include the request for retroactive support and section 7 (its not back support) and I think you should do that. If anything you can send a new offer that you will waive the request for that if they accept the other terms.

                  Truly the support is owed to your son and you need to stop letting their name calling get to you. People say a lot of terrible shit in their documents, you dont have to let it bother you.

                  Comment


                  • #39
                    Originally posted by Hide on Bush View Post
                    I can understand the controlling aspect, and that is more around because my ex refuses to do anything and I am in the position where their blame is going to placed on me
                    I understand what you are saying but I think you are overcompensating now. I am not a lawyer but my view is objective.

                    You offered and you offered to facilitate, they rejected, they have not ask you for a reasonable course of action yet.
                    You cannot hold your ex like a prisoner and force him into march to your direction in the name of your son. Let others do that for you so you are protected.


                    Originally posted by Hide on Bush View Post
                    because I have sole decision-making, and my son lives with me and spends the large majority of the time with me. I just want to make sure my basis are covered if this does go in front of a judge.
                    From what you described you have covered all your bases. An hour with a short and pointed summary in front of a lawyer will give you the legal objectivity you need.

                    I say take a breath, slow down.

                    Comment


                    • #40
                      Originally posted by pinkHouses View Post
                      I understand what you are saying but I think you are overcompensating now. I am not a lawyer but my view is objective.

                      You offered and you offered to facilitate, they rejected, they have not ask you for a reasonable course of action yet.
                      You cannot hold your ex like a prisoner and force him into march to your direction in the name of your son. Let others do that for you so you are protected.




                      From what you described you have covered all your bases. An hour with a short and pointed summary in front of a lawyer will give you the legal objectivity you need.

                      I say take a breath, slow down.
                      Is it a reasonable idea to ask OC if they are willing to have a written agreement stating they will not seek legal action IRT my son not wanting to go with his father and this matter can be settled along with the current court case, then I wont proceed through a separate motion to handle this? Only reason I did start it was because I was being threatened by my ex with contempt so I wanted to get ahead of it.

                      For reference, the current court case is my ex asking for

                      - split decision-making

                      - primary residency of my son

                      - majority parenting-time of my son

                      - section 7 expenses to return to a percentage base (currently fixed due to 5 years of him refusing to pay for ANY expenses)

                      We have already done a CC on this and while we were awaiting a SC, the matter we have been discussing popped up.

                      Comment


                      • #41
                        Agreements like that arent enforceable. You need the court to assist and the matter that popped up was the result of your exs unreasonable behaviour. I think you are right to file amended materials and a motion but I just dont know what that motion is. Stillpaying said you can do that, see what he says.

                        And its not opposing counsel, it is your ex, counsel simply represents them. You ask your ex through their counsel.

                        I also really think you should speak to a lawyer. This has gotten really complicated with the mental health and bullying issues. I have a feeling his lawyer is treating you badly as you are self rep. Legal fees to collect support are also tax deductible if that helps as all. If you are amending to ask for the retroactive support you would be eligible for that.

                        Comment


                        • #42
                          Why would they agree to/give anything?

                          If you want to get complicated and jump the queue talk to a lawyer.
                          The judge gave you how long and you started planning your motion right away.

                          Maybe: If you want to have someone monitor the exchanges then get a court order or consent for supervised exchanges.
                          You bring the child there, leave them in a room the father comes by, the exchange happens or it doesn't. You get a report after 4 sessions or so.

                          But so far it seems EVERYONE you have had involved has said the kid doesn't have to go with this father because it is a really bad situation and here you are trying to force an adult into therapy. Don't. You can't, a judge can't either.

                          I am virtually certain the "professionals" have given you advice and you have stuff in writing.

                          Really this is getting weird.

                          Comment


                          • #43
                            Originally posted by pinkHouses View Post
                            But so far it seems EVERYONE you have had involved has said the kid doesn't have to go with this father because it is a really bad situation and here you are trying to force an adult into therapy. Don't. You can't, a judge can't either.

                            I am virtually certain the "professionals" have given you advice and you have stuff in writing.
                            I do have stuff in writing and I am only trying to get my son and my ex back to terms so we can all move on with our lives. I feel like the onus is on me to do more as I have the sole decision-making, majority parenting-time and residency of my son.

                            Comment


                            • #44
                              I wouldnt worry too much about what ph has to say.

                              Comment


                              • #45
                                Originally posted by rockscan View Post
                                I think you are right to file amended materials and a motion but I just don�t know what that motion is.
                                This is what my motion looks like:

                                1. The Respondent's parenting-time shall be temporarily suspended until such time as a accredited child mental health professional can deem there is no risk of self-harm to the child through a certified letter. Case-by-case parenting-time may be utilized at the request of [the child] through consultation with his mental health professionals.

                                2. The Respondent shall complete the following:

                                a) a parenting program offered by [Supervision Service], or one similar in nature;

                                b) engagement in a program to assist the Respondent in understanding the impact of his behaviour on the relationship with [the child], such as “Caring Dads”, in order for the Respondent to recognize the importance in placing [the child's] needs above his own;

                                c) completion of an accredited anger management program, such as one provided by [Supervision Service], or one similar in nature; and

                                d) mutually agree to a reunification counsellor to assist and guide the process of reintroducing [the child] to the Respondent upon the completion of the above. This matter shall be paid for by the Respondent.

                                3. The Respondent shall pay cost in the value of $500.00 to the Applicant forthwith

                                Comment

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