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Divorce & Family Law This forum is for discussing any of the legal issues involved in your divorce.

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  #1  
Old 11-05-2009, 09:22 PM
divorcing dad divorcing dad is offline
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Default My wife took the baby from the home!

got a call from her sister while I was at work that they are moved in over there and I am not welcome. wife also said I can not see him

she left a note at home saying she took the baby and is living elsewhere!!!

she cleaned out the house

no court order - just because she felt it was unhealthy living environment

trying to find lawyer to do emergency custody order

ahhhhhhhhh!
  #2  
Old 11-06-2009, 10:36 AM
billiechic billiechic is offline
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yes, see a lawyer NOW! I hope you have been documenting your concerns.

Is being with her sister safer for the baby? I hope so, for the baby's sake, but get an emergency order filed TODAY!

I am so sorry.
  #3  
Old 11-06-2009, 04:19 PM
divorcing dad divorcing dad is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by billiechic View Post
yes, see a lawyer NOW! I hope you have been documenting your concerns.

Is being with her sister safer for the baby? I hope so, for the baby's sake, but get an emergency order filed TODAY!

I am so sorry.

she denied me access when I called last night. child services would not do anything to even check on him.

I filed a police report indicating that she took our son and lot of material possesions. meeting with my lawyer monday 10 am - will file emergency order next week. he said she had no right but it all must go through a court. will have to wait now :-(

lot's of prayers please!
  #4  
Old 11-07-2009, 08:10 AM
Stargate Stargate is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by divorcing dad View Post
got a call from her sister while I was at work that they are moved in over there and I am not welcome. wife also said I can not see him

she left a note at home saying she took the baby and is living elsewhere!!!

she cleaned out the house

no court order - just because she felt it was unhealthy living environment

trying to find lawyer to do emergency custody order

ahhhhhhhhh!
You need to find a lawyer asap and file an Ex-Parte Motion for IMMEDIATE custody/access to your baby. Have the lawyer charge your wife with kidnapping while he's at it.
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Old 11-07-2009, 10:28 AM
singledad99 singledad99 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Stargate View Post
You need to find a lawyer asap and file an Ex-Parte Motion for IMMEDIATE custody/access to your baby.
That is the way to go. BTW, how old is he as it plays a big factor during the emergency motion? If your son is old enough to have his own social/emotional ties in the neighbourhood (where you are, I assume) there is a good chance the judge will give you the temporary custody. You might have hard time justifying emergency if it is too late; it should be same day or next (sooner the better).

Quote:
Have the lawyer charge your wife with kidnapping while he's at it.
I don't think you should waste time with police as they won't retrieve the child or charge the other parent unless you had a court order for full physical custody.

Child services will not get involved unless the child is in danger. Most of the times the child is not considered to be in danger when kidnapped by the mother.

Stay calm and stay focused. Do not attempt going near her new residence as it might be seen as aggressive/obsessive behaviour. Stay calm and stay in control of yourself. Take care of yourself well. Make it all about your son (and it is) as he did nothing to deserve any of this.

Good luck and please keep us posted on how it goes in the court.
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Old 11-07-2009, 12:23 PM
divorcing dad divorcing dad is offline
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called today for access and she said she wants supervised access over at her sisters house. i told her that she has no right to act as a judgea jury to decide if I have supervised access.


she is playing a very evil game and using our son as a pawn. she knows he is all I care about

he is only 18 months and the love of my life
  #7  
Old 11-08-2009, 11:06 AM
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The baby was NOT kidnapped. Dad knows where the child is. That claim is counter productive and inflammatory and will only ratchet up the conflict and get in the way of finding a way to CO-PARENT.

Denial of access is reprehensible and demanding supervised access is extreme. I sure hope Mom isn't starting a campaign of alienation.
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Old 11-08-2009, 08:41 PM
billiechic billiechic is offline
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I agree, stay calm, don't involve the police and CAS, it is not needed if the child is safe, and it could come back against you.

DOCUMENT every time you ask for access. If she is only offering supervised can you negotiate it so that only the sister is there and not her? I can only imagine the hell you are going through being denied your son, but if you want to see him that bad I don't hink it would hold anything against you to agree for now. Maybe someone else can give better advice though.

Please let us know how you are doing.
  #9  
Old 11-09-2009, 03:00 PM
representingself representingself is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by divorcing dad View Post
got a call from her sister while I was at work that they are moved in over there and I am not welcome. wife also said I can not see him

she left a note at home saying she took the baby and is living elsewhere!!!

she cleaned out the house

no court order - just because she felt it was unhealthy living environment

trying to find lawyer to do emergency custody order

ahhhhhhhhh!
Your wife is not stable right now...
She is capable of making very careless and dangerous decisions.

You need to make sure that all future communication is done via written correspondence....especially if either of you are unable to control your emotions... wait at least 12 hours before sending anything that you have written, to ensure that you don't send anything that was written in the "heat of the moment", because once it's out there, you can't take it back!

She could be recording your telephone conversations and you don't want that to come back and bite you in the butt.

Make a written inventory of everything she took from the home (while your memory is fresh) and take photographs of the empty house....KEEP the note she left...and make a copy for back-up!

Either you or your Lawyer need to write her a letter stating that you will be seeking joint custody/shared parenting, be firm but fair and keep the blame game to a minimum. Maintain your emotions as best you can.

If applicable....

Make arrangements to begin child support payments for the 1st of December. You will appear to be putting the childs' needs first and foremost!

If you plan on paying the full guideline amount, make sure you state in the letter that you are doing so without prejudice towards your claim for joint custody. Pay by cheque and keep copies.

This is to avoid any claims for retroactive child support in the future!

Go to www.ontariocourtforms.on.ca and begin preparing your Form 13.1 Financial Statement....gather your tax return information for full and frank financial disclosure.

The more upfront and honest you are the better it will look to the Judges as the case proceeds.

Search the house for her financial records, tax returns, savings, RRSP's...anything you can get your hands on and make copies.

Go to the bank and restrict any joint bank accounts, credit cards, lines of credit, cell phone accounts etc.

Contact a local Family Mediation provider and make a formal request for their services....

Try to remain as calm as possible.... no matter how angry/hurt/betrayed you feel, you need to keep focused on your child.

Don't get CAS and the Police involved, that would be very counter-productive in your situation.

Get ready to wait.... this process takes time, nothing is resolved quickly in the Family Court system... you have to be patient.

If you act reasonably, you will see your child again, very soon!

Good Luck
  #10  
Old 11-09-2009, 11:36 PM
singledad99 singledad99 is offline
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Some excellent suggestions by Representingself. Speaking about supervised access, yes it is unfair and very uncalled for but take it as it is being offered without further delay. I would kill my ego for my son as the poor guy has already suffered enough for not seeing you for so many days. Yes, they know who their father is and they know he is not around anymore. Besides, your lawyer will also recommend the same i.e. take whatever access you are being offered until a better schedule is offered/negotiated/ordered. This will show that you put your son's needs ahead of you (access is your son's need). Just to be on safe, I would bring a friend along as a witness and a tape recorder to record the whole event.
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