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  • its my move in the game

    Just wondering about a couple things here.Were doing the colabritive law
    to settle our seperation.
    Spousal support is going to be the big battle in the seperation.She left the house to move in with her new bf.She quit her job of $33,000 moved out of town to live with him.I stayed in the matrimonial home with my two children.22yrs and 20yrs.One in college and the other one extremely ill and will now be on disability the rest of his life.Her lawyer sent a letter this week that they want occupational rent from me for the use of her half of the home.
    We own the home no mortgage.Im sure the colabritive law process is going to collapse and court will follow.
    If i loose in court on the ss and or the rental part.Could a judge reward her court costs.How do they force me to pay for those costs?Has anyone ever been told by a judge they have to pay occupancy costs to there ex.
    After all she just walked out and abandond her part of the house.We never agreed to who was going to stay in the home or who was going to leave.
    Also she still hasn,t come to get her stuff.Its been almost 2 yrs and 4 letters from my lawyer for her to remove her property from the home.Wouldn't that be like she is still occupying her half.

  • #2
    Yes, it would be like still occupying, and you could easily charge her storage, if they want to charge you rent.

    He's making a standard claim for "rent" which might apply in some situations and not others. Mainly this is to offset anything she will end up owing you for ongoing costs of maintainence and repairs. It is the least thing to take seriously.

    If she quit her job, and she is living with him and he is supporting her, then she doesn't have all that strong a claim for spousal support. Unless you earn many times what she used to earn, or if she has some other claim, like she spent many years caring for the children and had only recently returned to work. You have a stronger case than most.

    A judge can award her costs if her offer was reasonable compared to what the court chose to award. It can also be split up over different issues.

    Say she wins on spousal and loses on rent. Then you get the costs for rent, she gets costs for spousal, the judge will throw up his hands and say no one gets costs. See what I mean? If there are other issues to settle at the trial and you are quite reasonable about them, and only lose on rent or spousal, then she won't get costs.

    You need to receive a specific claim for a specific amount of spousal, so that you can decide if it is reasonable or not, otherwise you wouldn't be able to settle. Once she makes an offer like that, take it to a lawyer and get an opinion. Spousal is very difficult to calculate by hand and we won't really be able to say if an offer is reasonable or not.

    BTW, if she had "her part of the house" and you aren't using it, cover her stuff with sheets, take photos and state that you aren't occupying it so how the hell can she charge rent? Then send her a bill for maintainence.

    Comment


    • #3
      He's doing collaborative law...nothing that's negotiated, offered, said or anything else about the process is admissible in court.

      The lawyer's are unable to represent either party if it goes to court, collaborative law is meant to avoid court.

      It's also a HELL of a lot faster, but needs both parties to work together.

      Also she still hasn,t come to get her stuff.Its been almost 2 yrs and 4 letters from my lawyer for her to remove her property from the home.Wouldn't that be like she is still occupying her half.
      Find out how much it would cost to store her things, get 3 quotes and take the one in the middle. Have your lawyer send her lawyer a bill asking for storage costs estimated at X amount.

      Comment


      • #4
        CFL (collaborative family law) is a travesty and should be outlawed. Both spouses are giving 2 lawyers licence to milk them to death.
        This couple have been billed for 2 years with no end in sight. Mine took 3 years and only ended when my ex and I came to our own resolution.
        The occupational rent they claim is nothing but a red herring to generate more letters and billing from both lawyers. Remember, any threat made in CFL will never make it to court.
        If your ex quit her job without justification, a real court would impute income for her. In addition she would be liable for child support (1 kid still in school, one disabled).

        Good luck
        FN

        Comment


        • #5
          CFL is great for the purpose for which it is intended. Anything over 3-6 months and something is not right. (Meetings should occur once every 3-6 weeks, and you shouldn't need more than 4 or 5 of them, at most)

          CFL should NEVER run more than 6 months, and often should be complete in as little as 3.

          It's faster, and CHEAPER than going to court, and often ends in a better result than simply having a judge decide...the biggest downfall is that it requires that both parties work TOGETHER in good faith...when that doesn't happen, then the process is not working and the lawyers should be advocating a withdrawal from the CFL process.

          I was in CFL, for about 4 months...my ex refused to participate or cooperate, my lawyer advised we withdraw. Ligitation commenced, and it's still ongoing (albeit in the final stages)

          Comment


          • #6
            occupational rent

            Thanks for the info. To give more about spousal support. She made $33,000 and i make $49,000.She quit a job of 14yrs and pretty much worked steady through the marriage except for a few years in the beginnig. Her lawyer sent a fancy math break down and said i should pay anywhere from $488 to $650 per month.She has tucked herself into the bf house and only works part time.
            Estimated wage for 2009 is less than $18,000 per year.So her lawyer says. I know what she is doing. She is trying nto pull more ss from me and pay less cs back.I will get a wage imputed on her for sure.
            She bought a $37,000 car the summer of 2008 after she left me.She had no job at the time and lied about employment to obtain the car. She logged a payment and costs for her car over $1000 per month.
            I think she is trying to at least get her $510.00 car payment per month out of me buy spousal support. This boyfriend would definatly be paying all other expences for support.
            She would have no more money because of only part time work.I also printed out about 60 job bank listings in her area and field of work to prove she can be working full time.
            Does anyone no if i can put a house maintenace cost on my financial statement? I never kept any reciepts. What would be aceptable if i can enter costs?

            Comment


            • #7
              My move not my game

              My situation is much like Quizer. Married for 22 years, my wife started a retail job and shortly after started an affair with her boss. She moved in with him(he recently divorced). I tried to get her into mediation and even save the marriage but she refused. She sent one email about a month ago telling me to give our daughter the last 3 years of my income tax and other documents. I ignored this request because it was done on email with one sentence. Now I get an email saying that she is going to serve me with something at work. My two daughter live with me in the family home 19, 21 years old. I make about 120 and my ex makes 22. Because of the affair she refused any counselling etc. What would she be serving me and how long do I have to answer? I realize that divorce law has nothing to do with morality, but I had no choice on whether our marriage continued or not. Can she garnish my paycheck or what options is her lawyer giving her? What are my options?
              Totally vulnerable.

              Comment


              • #8
                Your daughters should not be used as a go-between and it's horrible for her to ask or expect them to.

                Your ex can ask for financial disclosure which it sounds like she is looking for. Not sure why she would choose to serve you at work. She cannot garnish your paycheck in any way. The courts could authorize your paycheck be garnished if you were to be paying her money, but what is it exactly she is asking for?

                If your children live with you then she should be paying you child support if one or both are in school. If it's spousal support she is after, that may be negated by the fact that she is now living with someone else.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by NBDad View Post
                  CFL is great for the purpose for which it is intended. Anything over 3-6 months and something is not right. (Meetings should occur once every 3-6 weeks, and you shouldn't need more than 4 or 5 of them, at most)

                  CFL should NEVER run more than 6 months, and often should be complete in as little as 3.
                  Yup, that's the storey of CFL but not the reality. Do you think lawyers sign up for CFL to save their clients money and to make less themselves? Get real. They can actually make more in CFL, especially if they have no skills in court.

                  FN
                  Last edited by FreeNow; 03-15-2010, 12:10 AM.

                  Comment

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