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  • #31
    Links... U just bitter for paying c.s. I feel sorry for you. That's what happens when u have babies . U have to take responsibility of them! I hope u learnt a good lesson and now u use protection, cuz obviously having babies and supporting them is making u a very bitter man! May god bless u!

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    • #32
      Originally posted by odf6979 View Post
      Links... U just bitter for paying c.s. I feel sorry for you. That's what happens when u have babies . U have to take responsibility of them! I hope u learnt a good lesson and now u use protection, cuz obviously having babies and supporting them is making u a very bitter man! May god bless u!

      Haha, maybe but seeing your honest posting validates how i feel - go get him tiger....

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      • #33
        Ex moved to Saudi Arabia

        Just like how ur ex got u ... And I must say she got you good!!!

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        • #34
          Speaking of assumptions, receivers usually assume us payors are bitter misers.

          Wrong. I don't think my ex lives lavishly. She can live comfortably, but can't, because she has an unemployed boyfriend to support, as well as his two kids that moved in. His contribution? He drives her car and drops my kids off at my house for her. I'm bitter that I often hear about them going without because of the money that my ex pays to maintain her boyfriend.

          Whatever sympathy you had going for you by Links being sarcastic with you is pretty much wiped out now by this:

          "Links... U just bitter for paying c.s. I feel sorry for you. That's what happens when u have babies . U have to take responsibility of them! I hope u learnt a good lesson and now u use protection, cuz obviously having babies and supporting them is making u a very bitter man! May god bless u"

          Try reading some of his threads. He does take responsibility. He actually steps up and tries to be a parent, instead of being relegated to being nothing more than a piggy bank.

          I politely tried to help you see the other side of the fence, and offered you some good advice about how you could think strategically and get more money than you have now, by reassuring your ex that you wouldn't go to court, because believe me, that's what he is trying to avoid. Instead, you moped around and waited for someone to tell you what you wanted to hear, that you are entitled and you should go for maximum monetary extraction, and then you dismissed everything that I had to say by assuming I'm just some dude bitter about paying support. If you took the time to time to really process what I was trying to say, you would have realized that is not the case.

          Your loss.

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          • #35
            Ex moved to Saudi Arabia

            Again you are assuming that I didn't assure my ex that I wouldn't go to court. If you read my posts I have been saying that since march I have been saying that to the extent that I won't even contact his employer to conform te validity of whatever frikin "fake" disclosure he will give me. What more can I offer him than that? He still hasn't paid a penny more. It's been six months of this "reassurance" from me. It seems like court is the last option left.

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            • #36
              By the way I I'm didn't come here for sympathy nor for insults. I don't know you and you don't know me. I came for advise on court. Let's just stick to that.

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              • #37
                Feel free to identify any part of my message where I have attempted to insult or degrade you.

                Disagreeing with you and telling you something that you don't want to hear is not the same as insulting someone.

                He sounds like he is stalling for sure, but I'm wondering what you'll actually get out of court with him so far away.

                Either way, I've said my piece, and I'm done with this thread. Good luck.

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                • #38
                  I fail to understand why I am being discouraged from going to court? Give me one reason why I should not? Forget that my son is 16 or that it will take time. One reason why I should not go to court if my ex is not providing diclosure and also is not increasing c.s? One reason !

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                  • #39
                    Good luck. Really.

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                    • #40
                      Originally posted by Straittohell View Post
                      Feel free to identify any part of my message where I have attempted to insult or degrade you.

                      Disagreeing with you and telling you something that you don't want to hear is not the same as insulting someone.

                      He sounds like he is stalling for sure, but I'm wondering what you'll actually get out of court with him so far away.

                      Either way, I've said my piece, and I'm done with this thread. Good luck.

                      Thankyou for your input in this matter. Appreciate it.

                      Comment


                      • #41
                        Originally posted by odf6979 View Post
                        I fail to understand why I am being discouraged from going to court? Give me one reason why I should not? Forget that my son is 16 or that it will take time. One reason why I should not go to court if my ex is not providing diclosure and also is not increasing c.s? One reason !
                        Because even if you have a slam dunk case and win, how are you going to get your hands on that money if he's in Saudi Arabia? If the Ex doesn't want you to get a penny from his Saudi Arabia work, you won't get a penny. You can have FRO cancel his passport, maybe 2 years from now... and maybe the courts can freeze his assets in Canada (if he is dumb enough to leave them here while you're both in court). What I'm saying is if you poke him in the eyes with litigation, he could poke you (and his own son) back by not paying anything. So you have to think, is it worth the fight? What will the Ex's reaction be to you taking him to court? Will he want to settle with you or fight you? Most people here will say dont go to court because court is very stressful, expensive, and the outcome of their cases is not the fairy tale outcome they thought it would be. Instead of chasing the Ex in Saudi Arabia, you and your son would be happier ignoring him. Stop being seduced by his $2600 promise which sounds like a mindgame he is playing with you to control you.

                        Comment


                        • #42
                          Originally posted by DeadBeatDouchebagDad View Post
                          Because even if you have a slam dunk case and win, how are you going to get your hands on that money if he's in Saudi Arabia? If the Ex doesn't want you to get a penny from his Saudi Arabia work, you won't get a penny. You can have FRO cancel his passport, maybe 2 years from now... and maybe the courts can freeze his assets in Canada (if he is dumb enough to leave them here while you're both in court). What I'm saying is if you poke him in the eyes with litigation, he could poke you (and his own son) back by not paying anything. So you have to think, is it worth the fight? What will the Ex's reaction be to you taking him to court? Will he want to settle with you or fight you? Most people here will say dont go to court because court is very stressful, expensive, and the outcome of their cases is not the fairy tale outcome they thought it would be. Instead of chasing the Ex in Saudi Arabia, you and your son would be happier ignoring him. Stop being seduced by his $2600 promise which sounds like a mindgame he is playing with you to control you.
                          ^^ This pretty much sums up what I was thinking as well.

                          Your ex has offered to pay $2600 a month in C/S. Was this a formal offer in writing, possibly through a lawyer? If it was, I would be inclined to accept. If it wasn't, I would send him a formal offer for him to accept. If he refuses, you are then stuck with HAVING to go to court.

                          You want your ex's financials, but are you sure the $2600 a month isn't guideline? Yeah, you may get more, but you aren't sure how much more. It isn't likely that you will get substantially more, and how much will court cost you to get a result you may, or may not, find acceptable? And in the mean time you will continue to struggle financially, and your child in return.

                          Arrears also may or may not be as substantial and a court may not give you what you think the numbers actually are. Judges do have some discretion.

                          IMO it comes down to this:

                          1. How much would that money help now/Do I need the money now?

                          2. If I refuse the offer, am I guaranteed I will be satisfied with the result if I go to court?

                          3. How long am I able to go on receiving nothing? or How long is too long to go without?

                          Court can take a very long time and be draining emotionally, physically and financially. I get that you feel you are being wronged and want to right that wrong and get all that you may be entitled to. But what are you willing to sacrifice in the mean time to get there?

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                          • #43
                            something else to consider:

                            If your ex should be killed in an accident, it is quite important that you have insurance and if you do not then at least if you have an agreement of some sort (2600.00/mth) then you have something to go after the estate with.

                            Never say never.

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                            • #44
                              Originally posted by arabian View Post
                              something else to consider:

                              If your ex should be killed in an accident, it is quite important that you have insurance and if you do not then at least if you have an agreement of some sort (2600.00/mth) then you have something to go after the estate with.

                              Never say never.
                              That works?

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                              • #45
                                A well-written agreement between the OP and her ex, concerning his informal offer to pay $2600/month in exchange for her not pursuing his financial information in court should have a clause to cover this possibility - something like "in the event of the first party's death during the period covered by this agreement, the obligation of that party shall be maintained without interruption by the estate of the first party". Or something like that.

                                The OP should consult a lawyer to draw up an airtight offer to send to the ex. As previous posters have noted, if he doesn't accept the offer, then she'll have to go the court route if she wants to see any more $$.

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