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Chance of moving to 50/50 access

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  • Chance of moving to 50/50 access

    I am looking for some feedback. I separated from my ex 2 and a half years ago. I left the house and the two kids (10, 8) with her and moved into an apartment about 30 minutes away. The place I moved into was not able to accommodate children so for about a year I saw the kids once a week. A year later I moved back into the neighborhood and rented a two bedroom apartment about 5 mins away. I was able to get one overnight a week and also a dinner night a week for about six months and then it increases to two overnights every other weekend and one overnight on Wednesday as well. This has been the case since last September. Now I would like to move into a one week on one week off schedule. As I have been steadily increasing my time with the kids what chances do I have to move to one week on/off schedule. She is trying to use the status quo argument. How likely are my chances of getting a one week on/off schedule?

  • #2
    I am far from an expert in this, but can provide some thoughts based on what I have read and my own experiences.

    In reading your post, it appears your access to date has been:
    - No access
    - You moved closer and increased to 1 overnight and a dinner night: 6 month period
    - You increased again to 2 overnights EOW and overnight Wednesdays: Present

    She is arguing status quo, but it sounds to me like the status quo to date is that you actually have been gradually receiving increases in parenting time at intervals. Maybe you can present to her a plan on how you positively build from the current situation, stating that the status quo actually has been graduated increases in parenting time and you wish to continue moving forward with that premise.

    Everyone says week on/off but remember there are many ways to have 50/50.....tailor it to whatever works best for the kids.

    Comment


    • #3
      I agree with LovingDad. 50/50 is the norm and you have been moving to that.
      If you are an active and good parent why not let you parent your children?

      A 2-2-5 schedule is really good one for that age. You get a 3 day weekend every other week and 2 weeknights. Kid exchanges usually occur at the end of the school day, you get them right from school.


      Once they become teenagers one week on/off becomes more common.

      If you ask for Monday and Tuesday nights as your days then you also have them Sunday Night EOW and can help them with school 2 nights a week.

      Comment


      • #4
        Originally posted by LovingDad1234 View Post
        Everyone says week on/off but remember there are many ways to have 50/50.....tailor it to whatever works best for the kids.
        In particular, I think that the 2255 schedule is objectively better.

        Comment


        • #5
          I do owe back child support. Would this hurt my case? It's not my primary focus but if we do move to a shared parenting plan then the ex will be paying me child support as she makes more than I. I am sure she will try to keep me under 40%. We are going into mediation in the end of November and wonder if I should pay all the child support arrears before mediation or work that out in mediation. The 2255 schedule looks to be best in our situation.

          Comment


          • #6
            You should always pay arrears to make yourself look good. As for child support paid to you, always present your case in the best interest of the child and have proof like studies and other things that show shared parenting is good. Let your ex be the one all about money.

            Comment


            • #7
              Originally posted by ChangedofTimes View Post
              I do owe back child support. Would this hurt my case? It's not my primary focus but if we do move to a shared parenting plan then the ex will be paying me child support as she makes more than I. I am sure she will try to keep me under 40%. We are going into mediation in the end of November and wonder if I should pay all the child support arrears before mediation or work that out in mediation. The 2255 schedule looks to be best in our situation.
              Definitely pay it ahead of time, as soon as possible. Now.

              Comment


              • #8
                pay the arrears and go into court with "clean hands".

                Comment

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