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Parenting Issues This forum is for discussing any of the parenting issues involved in your divorce, including parenting of step-children.

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  #11  
Old 02-21-2019, 01:33 AM
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Hopefully parents will pause and consider, sincerely, what is in the best interest of the children and go from there. If parents cannot communicate, and show willingness to oblige the other parent to be involved (even with limited restrictions) then the court will make decisions for the parents.

I sense that parents can't get over their animosity for each other. I really feel for the kids here. Hope parents can get their shit together so the kids can have decent lives.

Very sad
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  #12  
Old 02-22-2019, 11:37 AM
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Originally Posted by tunnelight View Post
Does your ex have any mental illness or disability that hinders his learning?
I suspect there are mental health issues there...but affecting his ability to learn? No. He's learning to be a dad right now- he never cooked before. But he's said that he's learning to cook food for her. Which is great. He asks me to provide him with recipes, I do. Anything that he's asked me to do to help him learn to care for her- I've done.


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Originally Posted by arabian View Post
Hopefully parents will pause and consider, sincerely, what is in the best interest of the children and go from there. If parents cannot communicate, and show willingness to oblige the other parent to be involved (even with limited restrictions) then the court will make decisions for the parents.

I sense that parents can't get over their animosity for each other. I really feel for the kids here. Hope parents can get their shit together so the kids can have decent lives.

Very sad
there was (and probably is) still lots of animosity there. As I said- I realized I was wrong to take the position that he couldn't parent/ learn to parent our daughter. I'm open to increasing his parenting time- it's just hard because I don't know how to resolve any of this with the safety/anger issues.
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  #13  
Old 02-24-2019, 12:06 AM
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if he really wanted to physically harm you, don't you think he could do that out in the mediation/ parenting coordination parking lot?

Did the OCL request any psychological assessment for the father?

Last edited by tunnelight; 02-24-2019 at 12:08 AM.
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  #14  
Old 02-25-2019, 12:05 PM
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Originally Posted by tunnelight View Post
if he really wanted to physically harm you, don't you think he could do that out in the mediation/ parenting coordination parking lot?
You know- I kind of wish it was that simple with the risk to me or our daughter..the problem is that 99.9% of the time- he's fine. He's just your normal run of the mill jerk- normal divorce acrimony. The problem is that other 0.01%- he'll say stuff like "if you lock this door- this is when there will be murder". Or he threatens some other- weirdly specific- form of assault against me. Has he ever followed through? Nope. But I'm hoping never to find out if he could. He's unpredictable. He doesn't react well when he's extremely angry, or stressed. When we were together- I could predict that...now? I can't and that's the issue.

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Did the OCL request any psychological assessment for the father?
Not that I can remember. I asked for a closed CAMH mental health and addiction assessment from the start. I was going to push for this AGAIN...but what's the point? He's going to lie. He's going to tell 1/2 truths.

What the OCL requested is that he continue with his individual therapy and that I have an intake session with his therapist- and then later I can have another session to speak with her about whether he's ready to remove the supervision....last week he told me this was ALL A BIG MIXUP- and OF COURSE he told his therapist about threatening to kill our daughter. She probably just forgot to mention it to the OCL.
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  #15  
Old 02-27-2019, 10:40 PM
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Originally Posted by Janus View Post
I saw your ex pass out at 31 flavours last night. He must be pretty sick.
You told me it was your friendís sisterís boyfriendís brotherís girlfriend heard from this guy who knows this kid whoís going with a girl who saw him pass-out at 31 Flavors last night. I guess itís pretty serious.
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  #16  
Old 02-27-2019, 10:43 PM
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I'm not a nymphomaniac though, I'm a compulsive liar.
Sure you are! Sex is a weapon! You said it yourself; you use it to get respect!
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  #17  
Old 02-27-2019, 10:44 PM
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Parenting is not an inherent ability, it is a learned skill.
Nor does it require a PHD.
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  #18  
Old 02-27-2019, 10:47 PM
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Originally Posted by tunnelight View Post
if he really wanted to physically harm you, don't you think he could do that out in the mediation/ parenting coordination parking lot?

Did the OCL request any psychological assessment for the father?
I don't think this matter is being mediated. (Correct me if I am wrong.) If it was being mediated it wouldn't pass the mandatory assessment phase for power imbalances etc.

https://www.riverdalemediation.com/a...ion-processes/
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  #19  
Old 02-27-2019, 10:48 PM
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Originally Posted by iona6656 View Post
Not that I can remember. I asked for a closed CAMH mental health and addiction assessment from the start. I was going to push for this AGAIN...but what's the point? He's going to lie. He's going to tell 1/2 truths.
You need a very serious situation to get one ordered. Take a look at the Izyuk matter. It took multiple trials to get to the point of it being ordered! Judges don't hand out these orders very often. It requires mountains (5+ legal boxes full) of evidence.
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  #20  
Old 02-28-2019, 01:52 PM
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Originally Posted by Tayken View Post
I don't think this matter is being mediated. (Correct me if I am wrong.) If it was being mediated it wouldn't pass the mandatory assessment phase for power imbalances etc.

https://www.riverdalemediation.com/a...ion-processes/
*ding ding ding*

It's not being mediated, and I won't go there anymore.

We tried family mediation from the outset- the mediator rejected our file because domestic violence screening.
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