requesting to extend regular weekend for long weekend?

[Tayken]

What would you call them, winners?

I think the we just have to accept that they are losers.

You told me that you like her
But she doesn't want to know
You tried so much to take her
But there's no way to go

I know that kind of feeling
Knocking on someone's door
I know the endless crying
When you don't know what you're living for

Write a letter (what's the matter)
You'll feel better (write a letter)
You'll feel better when it's done

There is one way to show
What you feel for the girl
Write her a lovely letter
Tell her what you're looking for

Don't think it's old fashion
To take one's heart (when it's true)
You gotta take it as a man
When you can't win her in this game

Write a letter (what's the matter)
You'll feel better (write a letter)
You'll feel better when it's done

There are losers and winners
Just like you and me
Losers and winners - just like you and me

You should give me the letter
I'll use it for my own (ha ha)
Maybe she wants to take me
Before she stays alone

Could be my destination
To pick up broken heart
Why don't you take it easy
And screw the girl who's next to you

Write a letter (what's the matter)
You'll feel better (write a letter)
You'll feel better when it's done

There are losers and winners
Just like you and me
Losers and winners
Just like you and me

Losers and winners

[FightingForFamily]

What would you call them, winners?

I'm a huge advocate for shared custody for everyone I advise. However, I don't have shared custody and I don't think I ever had a chance of getting it. Too many underhanded tactics and not enough money to address them all.

Fast forward a number of years and I see Tayken's point. I do feel like a loser sometimes. Saddled with an extra mortgage payment every month I'll never have enough cash flow to buy a house. And even if I got one, it's insane to spend tens of thousands of dollars for my son to have his own room for 4 nights per month on top of paying the CS... yet it's fairly necessary. He has autism and needs his own space and things and we regularly struggle in managing his relationship with his step siblings.

The more successful I am post divorce, the more taxes and support I pay. Yippy.

[Links17]

You have a single son FFF is your ex remarried? You are I guess ?

[Links17]

If you wanted shared custody I can give you the strat to get it

[LovingFather32]

FFF .. I for one don't think you're a loser. I think being called a loser just for being an EOW parent is a bit much. Just my opinion.
Besides ..I thought labelling winners and losers in family law was frowned upon here.

I have a buddy in the army who's EOW and a super dad. Just doesnt have the time for shared with his job. The kids are super happy. He's definitely not a loser.

[LovingFather32]

If you wanted shared custody I can give you the strat to get it

FFF's been through the ringer if I remember correctly. False allegations after false allegation from his ex. She shouldn't have sole at all.

[trinton]

I'm a huge advocate for shared custody for everyone I advise. However, I don't have shared custody and I don't think I ever had a chance of getting it. Too many underhanded tactics and not enough money to address them all.

Fast forward a number of years and I see Tayken's point. I do feel like a loser sometimes. Saddled with an extra mortgage payment every month I'll never have enough cash flow to buy a house. And even if I got one, it's insane to spend tens of thousands of dollars for my son to have his own room for 4 nights per month on top of paying the CS... yet it's fairly necessary. He has autism and needs his own space and things and we regularly struggle in managing his relationship with his step siblings.

The more successful I am post divorce, the more taxes and support I pay. Yippy.

Is he turning 14 anytime soon?

[Janus]

Besides ..I thought labelling winners and losers in family law was frowned upon here.

If you have the kids EOW, you have lost.

If you consented to lose, then you are a loser.

Every time a father consents to lose, he makes it that much harder for other fathers to win. Fathers who consent to lose their kids don't just hurt themselves, they hurt other families too.

If you find labels upsetting, go to University and find a safe space to protect yourself from the world.

[LovingFather32]

If you have the kids EOW, you have lost.

If you consented to lose, then you are a loser.

Every time a father consents to lose, he makes it that much harder for other fathers to win. Fathers who consent to lose their kids don't just hurt themselves, they hurt other families too.

If you find labels upsetting, go to University and find a safe space to protect yourself from the world.

Janus ... I like your style. Trust me I fought my heart out for 50/50 shared everything so I get what you're saying. Guess I just never really saw myself as wining anything. D5 has surely won though.
Some lose in a literal sense .. I personally wouldn't call them losers though. Just my $0.02.

[blinkandimgone]

I take issue with the idea that a person chooses not to have their kids half the time or at the very least more than a few days a month because of a job. I don't understand what they plan to do if something happens to the other parent and they're no longer around. Do they plan to adopt the kid out and continue seeing them only a few days a month? Would they then decide to make changes to allow their kids to be a part of their life if he/she was the only living parent? Why not make your kids worth the effort now and prioritize them, rather than a job?

[LovingFather32]

Okay .. you guys have successfully swayed me. Friggen Losers!

[arabian]

I believe it would be grossly unfair to refer to FightingForFamily as a "loser." This individual has spent 6+years in litigation. Cost of lawyers has possibly impacted him to a point where he felt he could no longer continue the fight. Furthermore, I believe that his ex was unemployed and it stands to reason that someone has to work to support the family.

Circumstances are not cookie-cutter and sometimes it simply is not feasible for an individual to keep up the good fight for custody. I think more emphasis should be on the quality of time, as opposed to the quantity of time, spent with children.

[trinton]

I believe it would be grossly unfair to refer to FightingForFamily as a "loser." This individual has spent 6+years in litigation. Cost of lawyers has possibly impacted him to a point where he felt he could no longer continue the fight. Furthermore, I believe that his ex was unemployed and it stands to reason that someone has to work to support the family.

Circumstances are not cookie-cutter and sometimes it simply is not feasible for an individual to keep up the good fight for custody. I think more emphasis should be on the quality of time, as opposed to the quantity of time, spent with children.

I think there's more to it then quality and quantity. The way I see it is that you're either a parent or a visitor.

I will not consent to be a visitor , I will battle it out with every nickel and dime to my name, and will self rep if I must. Being nothing more than a visitor to my child is not acceptable.

[arabian]

^ fair enough but I think we must remember that there are many out there who do not want anything more than EOW and we certainly shouldn't criticise them for that. Some people start at EOW and then circumstances change which allow them to pursue/consider shared or full custody.

[Links17]

I am not calling them losers like they are unworthy or bad people...

I am calling them losers becasuse they have lost something important and it is unfortunate. Their children are also losers.

It is only the mothers that have won in these cases and the state at the expense of everybody else.