Ottawa Divorce .com Forums


User CP

New posts

Advertising

  Ottawa Divorce .com Forums > Main Category > Divorce & Family Law

Divorce & Family Law This forum is for discussing any of the legal issues involved in your divorce.

Reply
 
Thread Tools
  #1  
Old 08-22-2013, 06:21 PM
stressed76 stressed76 is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 40
stressed76 has a little shameless behaviour in the past
Question Activities during access

Since my ex has not been successful with the financial issues she has decided to hit me where it hurts. She has scheduled my son in "Family Tennis" Saturday's from 11:30am to 12:30pm with her, her boyfriend and her boyfriend's son. She has also scheduled him in Archery on Sunday's from 2:00pm to 3:00pm. My schedule is difficult it is 5 days on followed by 4 days off so the access portion of my agreement is as follows:

Quote:
Due to the nature of the Respondent's employment, specifically that he is a shift worker, the Applicant and the Respondent shall work out a schedule for the Respondent to have access to (child's name) based on his varying schedule. The Respondent shall provide a copy of his work schedule to the Applicant/Mother and they will come to a mutual agreement as to the Respondent's access. If the parties are unable to agree, for whatever reason, on the exact weekend access to (child's name), the Respondent/Father shall be entitled to at least two weekends per month from Friday to Sunday when he is not working.
So - do I have any grounds to stop at least the family tennis lesson? Its too far to drive him down, wait, drive back, drive back on Sunday, wait, drive back here and then drive him back to his home. Its just ridiculous and the archery is definitely available on other nights I checked. I would take him to the archery and drop him off early but this cuts 7 hours from my already limited access. If I have to do the family tennis as well its going to leave no time for me to see him which is what she's counting on. She said well then you can wait until January and see what he takes then. I know its a punishment for refusing to give in on the financial issues but do I have any legal means to stop this?

Thank you.
Reply With Quote
  #2  
Old 08-22-2013, 07:34 PM
Rioe's Avatar
Rioe Rioe is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Ontario
Posts: 3,348
Rioe will become famous soon enough
Default

Just pick him up as normal when it is your weekend, and return him as normal. If she wants to register him for activities he may miss many of without consulting you first, it's her problem. I wouldn't pay your proportion of any associated expense either, as it was not discussed in advance and is a waste of money due to his inability to attend every session.
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old 08-22-2013, 07:50 PM
stressed76 stressed76 is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 40
stressed76 has a little shameless behaviour in the past
Default

Thanks Rioe that's what my first inclination was - just continue on as normal. I just wasn't sure if that was something that could come back to bite me later. She forwarded me the bill for all 4 people and said since it was my son's idea I had to pay 70% of the bill for the family. I'm not even sure how she puts this stuff in writing - she has to know its insane...right??
Reply With Quote
  #4  
Old 08-22-2013, 07:56 PM
BitHunter BitHunter is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: May 2010
Posts: 546
BitHunter is on a distinguished road
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by stressed76 View Post
She forwarded me the bill for all 4 people and said since it was my son's idea I had to pay 70% of the bill for the family.
This should go to the "best of this site" section
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Old 08-22-2013, 08:06 PM
takeontheworld takeontheworld is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 505
takeontheworld has a little shameless behaviour in the past
Default

I think some of that crazy rubbish is just to get under an ex's skin. Surely she didnt actually think you would pay...right?
Reply With Quote
  #6  
Old 08-22-2013, 08:46 PM
Qrious Qrious is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: May 2013
Location: Ontario
Posts: 307
Qrious is on a distinguished road
Default

Anyone who knows me, knows I am 100% supportive of activities for kids. I also passionately believe that part of parenting is attending these activities with your children. This is true for BOTH parents, regardless of who thinks they "own" the child's attention at the time of the activity.

I have to say, though, that your situation is a very strange one. Very strange. She actually wants the child to attend an activity with HER on day the child is with you?! That's ludicrous. I could see if the activity is the child's and she wishes to attend as an observer, but.... Whoa.

The tennis - no flipping way. The archery - maybe. If it can't be rescheduled to another day/time when the child is not with you. If not, and the child is really interested in the activity, I say support that one in any way you can.

But "family tennis"!? She's nuts. I won't even comment on her thinking you pay any amount for HER family tennis. Thanks for the laugh.
Reply With Quote
  #7  
Old 08-22-2013, 08:46 PM
stressed76 stressed76 is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 40
stressed76 has a little shameless behaviour in the past
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by takeontheworld View Post
I think some of that crazy rubbish is just to get under an ex's skin. Surely she didnt actually think you would pay...right?
I would hope she's just being ridiculous I mean she's obnoxious and a pain in the ass but not stupid. She seriously forwarded me the invoice and said she could provide proof that it was my son's idea if I needed. She then said that I could send my cheque for 70% of the cost when I returned our son or I could send an email transfer if I preferred...
Reply With Quote
  #8  
Old 08-22-2013, 08:51 PM
stressed76 stressed76 is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 40
stressed76 has a little shameless behaviour in the past
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Qrious View Post
Anyone who knows me, knows I am 100% supportive of activities for kids. I also passionately believe that part of parenting is attending these activities with your children. This is true for BOTH parents, regardless of who thinks they "own" the child's attention at the time of the activity.

I have to say, though, that your situation is a very strange one. Very strange. She actually wants the child to attend an activity with HER on day the child is with you?! That's ludicrous. I could see if the activity is the child's and she wishes to attend as an observer, but.... Whoa.

The tennis - no flipping way. The archery - maybe. If it can't be rescheduled to another day/time when the child is not with you. If not, and the child is really interested in the activity, I say support that one in any way you can.

But "family tennis"!? She's nuts. I won't even comment on her thinking you pay any amount for HER family tennis. Thanks for the laugh.
Oh she was very generous though Qrious she said I could play with our son, her boyfriend and her boyfriend's son on my weekends if I preferred LMAO. The archery I'm fine with because I know he wants to take it so even though its offered other nights and its cutting into my time I am fine with taking him to that. The family tennis though is just freaking insane.
Reply With Quote
  #9  
Old 08-22-2013, 09:06 PM
BitHunter BitHunter is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: May 2010
Posts: 546
BitHunter is on a distinguished road
Default

How about this: I have a small and light, (women/child) Browning compound hunting bow. I will sell it to you, and you can send the invoice to your ex. Hm? If you are interested I'll check out the draw length/weight.
Reply With Quote
  #10  
Old 08-22-2013, 09:14 PM
standing on the sidelines standing on the sidelines is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Kitchener Ontario
Posts: 5,602
standing on the sidelines is on a distinguished road
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by stressed76 View Post
Thanks Rioe that's what my first inclination was - just continue on as normal. I just wasn't sure if that was something that could come back to bite me later. She forwarded me the bill for all 4 people and said since it was my son's idea I had to pay 70% of the bill for the family. I'm not even sure how she puts this stuff in writing - she has to know its insane...right??
lol that is way to funny! Everytime I think I have heard it all, along comes posts like this that takes it to a whole different level.

I agree with other posters, keep things normal with pickups and drop offs. If the tennis is something that your child wants to do, are there any public courts or things that you and him can join to play together? LOL then send the ex an email asking for the 30% she owes for both of you because he wants to play and he needed someone to play against?? Makes about as much sense as what she is asking for in regards to payment.
Reply With Quote
Reply


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Help me make a fair access schedule please? representingself Divorce & Family Law 12 08-11-2011 10:48 PM
Police undertaking overrides order for access? formyGirls Divorce & Family Law 8 05-23-2011 03:32 PM
Custody and Access Decision-Making and the Breastfeeding Child: Cavannah v. Johne WorkingDAD Divorce & Family Law 8 05-03-2011 10:55 AM
Increasing Shared Access lets_be_fair Divorce & Family Law 0 04-28-2011 09:36 AM
Case Conference Info tycooke Divorce & Family Law 9 07-12-2006 09:11 AM


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 10:40 PM.