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Just found out she went to the States, WITH THE KIDS!!!!

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  • #16
    lol Dinky.

    I guess what we were supposed to say to make him feel better was:

    "She's absolutely horrible and you are a wonderful, pro-active father who is doing everything right and not at all contributing to your own demise. I'm sure when you end up with EOW access its only because she's female, you're male..and the whole family court system only ever lets mothers win. Just keep doing exactly what you're doing because its Canadian Immigration and the Family Court's fault that you're going to lose access to your kids. Evil, bad women!"


    I'm going to copy and paste that for the next whiner that comes in because apparently constructive criticism leads to them themselves throwing themselves out the nearest window rather than actually doing something for themselves and their children.

    Lawd knows I don't want my tax dollars going to scraping this dude off the pavement.

    Sorry for being insensitive but jeez.

    Comment


    • #17
      I took my d6 to St. Lucia for March Break. The only time I was asked for a consent letter (I had it, in duplicate) was when we landed and I was checking through Canada Customs.

      While I don't believe your ex was right, I agree with Mess. This is a document and move along. If/when you have a few instances like this, you then have sufficient evidence to show a pattern of the ex of unilaterally doing things without so much as notification to you.

      This is evidence of her behaving moderately badly by not informing the other parent of foreign travel. But it isn't much else and one instance isn't enough to hang my hat on in itself.

      Comment


      • #18
        Originally posted by slughead10 View Post
        the op should notify that he does not give content for his children to travel and i would be willing to bet it doesn't happen again.
        Disagree.

        1) The only effect would be to annoy his ex.

        2) The OP should focus his efforts on being a father, not on ratcheting up conflict. That is, work towards regaining regular access.

        Comment


        • #19
          Slughead:

          Typical for you.

          However, Immigration doing their job isn't the issue. This father doing his job is the issue.

          Explain this to me:

          Ok, we don't have a custody agreement, nor do we have a visitation agreement (although we're working on one right now), and I'm the ncp who sees his children whenever the cp feels like it.

          I just found out that she took our kids on a business trip to the States for 4-5 days.
          How the hell does a man decide he's the NCP without any custody or visitation agreement in place without being lax in his assumed 50/50 access? Who told him he was the NCP? Why is he allowing anyone to take away his assumed access without a fight or at least documenting and having a plan of attack in court for what she's doing?

          How does this guy not see his children during a divorce...pre-court agreement...for 4-5 days?

          Either be a 50/50 parent or leave her alone when she has to take the kids with her because she has a business trip. One or the other...not both.

          He wants to sit back...not father his children but control where his ex takes the kids when she needs to work and travel?

          Many, many people here have custody/access issues...and they proactively handle them. The posters are trying to explain to this person that he's blaming the wrong people and taking the wrong approach to his parenting role.

          You trying to side with this person's deflection and instigate nonsense is your typical, nonsensical behavior.
          Last edited by Pursuinghappiness; 07-12-2012, 06:20 PM.

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          • #20
            Just a suggestion

            Maybe she didn't tell them you were separated.

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            • #21
              hp dad

              Did u get an answer to ur question????
              Leagally, i BELEIVE that a travel waiver IS a requirement for under age kids of divorced parents to travel,,,,signed one myself.It is a requirement for entry into canada in the same situation,,,,got around it that time.
              A lawyer or notary can make this document for about 30 dollars."They" want u to have one for each time ur kids travel.I gave my ex a "blanket" waiver for all future travel,,, 30 dollars from notary.
              If u do or do not get questioned or get around this,that's another story.

              Comment


              • #22
                There is no law against taking your children across the border for a vacation, as long as there is not court order prohibiting travel because a parent is a flight risk. The reason you need a letter from the other parent is that a border official MAY decide to hold you up if they have any reason to be suspicious. The letter will allow unimpeded crossing if your 3 year old happens to start crying "I miss Mommmy!!!"

                Also, airlines have their own internal rules for checking for travel permissions and they may deny boarding if they are suspicious. There is no legislation that specifically prohibits travelling with children, it is all situational and the notarized letter (I provided one for my ex for a vacation) is to prevent problems, not because legislation requires it.

                Comment


                • #23
                  Originally posted by Mess View Post
                  There is no law against taking your children across the border for a vacation, as long as there is not court order prohibiting travel because a parent is a flight risk. The reason you need a letter from the other parent is that a border official MAY decide to hold you up if they have any reason to be suspicious. The letter will allow unimpeded crossing if your 3 year old happens to start crying "I miss Mommmy!!!"

                  Also, airlines have their own internal rules for checking for travel permissions and they may deny boarding if they are suspicious. There is no legislation that specifically prohibits travelling with children, it is all situational and the notarized letter (I provided one for my ex for a vacation) is to prevent problems, not because legislation requires it.
                  Hopefully, one day legislation will require it.

                  Some food for thought on the topic:

                  NEWS UPDATE:

                  This Friday JULY 13, 2012 a Judge of the Canadian Criminal Courts in Newmarket, Ontario will make make a ruling if the Grandfather, Tadeusz (TED) Ustaszewski, is guilty of assisting his daughter in the in the International Parental Child Abduction Case of Alexander & Christopher Watkins also known as the "Watkins Missing Children".

                  It will be held in Room 202 at 2:15pm in the Superior Courts in Newmarket, Ontario, Canada.

                  Prior to June 1st, Tadeusz (TED) Ustaszewski lawyer tried to file an 11b Application in the Newmarket Criminal Courts citing un-due delays to complete the criminal proceedings and that the charges should be dropped. Information provided by the Courts Victim Services Office explains that Tadeusz Ustaszewski had been stalling the courts for years either by firing his lawyer or bringing in doctors notes saying that he could not attend the criminal trial. On June 1st the Criminal Court Judge stayed the charges and the criminal proceeding continues on June 22 in room 106 at 9:30 in the Newmarket Criminal Courts.

                  There has been NO further action on Tadeusz Ustaszewski for the International Child Abduction of the two Watkins boys and he has been free since his arrest on only a “Promise to Appear” agreement. There was NO incarceration or bond set in this case.

                  The Grandfather was charged in International Child Abduction while the boy Father, Stephen Watkins, continues to fight in the Polish Courts for the return of his two Canadian Missing / Abducted children. ALEXANDER & CHRISTOPHER WATKINS, were abducted internationally from Canada into the United State then to Europe with the use of a "Canceled" Canadian Passport by the non-custodial Mother, Edyta ( Ustaszewski / Ustaszewska ) Watkins. The Abducting mother's Canadian Passport had been confirmed Canceled by the Ontario Government and confirmed by the Ombudsman of Passport Canada 42-Days prior to the abduction of the Watkins Children. The children's Canadian Passports were Ordered by the Courts to be handed over repeatedly, with the non-custodial Mother refusing to comply.

                  Their grandfather, Tadeusz (TED) Ustaszewski is charged by York Regional Police (YRP) with assisting in this International Child Abduction and the children's disappearance. He solely picked up the boys at their schools in Newmarket for a supervised weekend visit with their non-custodial mother but instead drove all of them across into the United States and left them at a Tim Horton’s coffee shop before returning alone to Canada. The boys were to be brought back to their school in Newmarket the next day as he had previously done many times before.

                  (Previous News Report)
                  GLOBAL NATIONAL NEWS: Missing Children - International Child Abduction - Canceled Passport Used

                  GLOBAL NATIONAL NEWS: Missing Children - International Child Abduction - Canceled Passport Used - YouTube

                  Follow the “Watkins Missing Children” case and more info can be found here:
                  FB: Watkins Missing Children | Facebook
                  YOUTUBE: Watkins Missing Children - YouTube
                  WEBSITE: ALERT ! - ABDUCTED MISSING CHILDREN : Alexander Watkins & Christopher Watkins
                  TWITTER: https://twitter.com/Child_Abduction

                  Comment


                  • #24
                    Originally posted by Heart-broken dad View Post
                    Thank you to the last two people who posted for being completely useless....

                    If you're crossing a border, you need a passport. If you don't have one, they won't let you cross. If you travel across a border, you need to get consent from the other parent.

                    This is incorrect, a child under the age of 18 does not require a passport to cross the border only a birth certificate. A passport is required for a child only if they are flying out on an international flight before the age of 18.

                    Comment


                    • #25
                      Originally posted by slughead10 View Post
                      he asked if it was legal...and no its not.....she does need his permission or a court order. i live at a border crossing and know how lax security is but if you want to ensure it does not happen again contact border services and give them your exs name and the children's names and let them know you don't consent.

                      problem solved



                      people here are ignoring his question and giving him all kinds of unasked for advice.....and opinions
                      Actually, there is no exit strategy in Canada. So it is up to the receiving country to establish what is allowable. If you want to have the other parent have a problem coming back your recommendation works.

                      There is only one criminal system you could potentially register with that would alert the US border really. Read Stephen's website he details the whole problem with border security, custody and access.

                      Comment


                      • #26
                        people here are ignoring his question and giving him all kinds of unasked for advice.....and opinions
                        Actually I did answer his question. I posted to the link to the travel site had you scrolled up....and there is nothing illegal about her not having a travel consent. They are separated with assumed 50/50 custody. She technically wouldn't need a signed notification until they have an interim access/custody assessment..and even then, they probably won't ask for it. They generally don't ask about your maritial status. If they asked everyone travelling with kids those questions at the border where I lived, it would take hours to cross.

                        Kids 15 and under do not require passports for travel between US and Canada..,.never have.

                        Bottom line, the issue isn't Canadian/US Immigration. And when this guy comes back complaining about the EOW screwjob, it will hardly be much of a surprise.

                        Comment


                        • #27
                          I don't think his big issue is so much that she was allowed across the border by officials, it's that she did this without even consulting him or notifying him in advance. This particular situation has made it clear to him how much power she has over the situation until he has an agreement in place.

                          His issue is not really travel at all, it's that his ex has taken control of the kids, is acting like a gatekeeper, is excluding him from their lives, and he's not fighting it very well. He needs to push for a fair custody and access agreement, and include a clause about consultation and notification about travel plans and arrangements if it bothers him. He should be documenting her past behaviour such as this, with proof (do you have something written down from her saying she did this?) so that he can present it in court as evidence that she is not communcating with him or supporting his ongoing relationship with the children. Sounds like she's building up quite a status quo of being in control and denying access.

                          Think maybe it's time for him to stop trying to self-rep and get a lawyer. Relying on OCL to do the job of a lawyer isn't working for him. Waiting around for his ex to change isn't working for him. Waiting till his children are old enough to ask to see him again certainly isn't going to work for him.

                          Comment


                          • #28
                            His issue is not really travel at all, it's that his ex has taken control of the kids, is acting like a gatekeeper, is excluding him from their lives, and he's not fighting it very well. He needs to push for a fair custody and access agreement, and include a clause about consultation and notification about travel plans and arrangements if it bothers him. He should be documenting her past behaviour such as this, with proof (do you have something written down from her saying she did this?) so that he can present it in court as evidence that she is not communcating with him or supporting his ongoing relationship with the children. Sounds like she's building up quite a status quo of being in control and denying access.
                            Since I've been on this forum, I've seen a number of men with very similar circumstances complaining about this and not doing much about it.

                            They continue in the same vein as when they were married, letting the stbx wife gatekeeper time with the kids and sit in the background complaining while she establishes status quo.

                            That's all fine if that's what they want to do despite all the advice they receive in here.

                            My issue is when they come back in here to complain about the EOW screwjob that they got and instead of blaming it on their own inaction...blame it on all other women and a biased family court system. Watch for future posts from this guy (assuming he didn't swan dive off a ledge yet). I'll bet you he becomes a member of the women bashing club real soon.

                            Comment


                            • #29
                              Watkins Missing Children - UPDATE THREAD

                              NEW - Please see this link for updates on this case:

                              http://www.ottawadivorce.com/forum/f...-update-12862/

                              Comment


                              • #30
                                Also, from one CanLII posted here by Tayken on the forum, Justice Czutrin states:


                                "14. The child may travel with either parent outside of Ontario or Canada, as per the parenting schedule, with 45 days notice and a detailed itinerary, including hotels or other accommodations. The parent who plans to travel shall be given a written consent as required by government regulations to travel at least two weeks prior to travel."

                                (Bold is mine)

                                L.L. v. M.C., 2012 ONSC 3311 (CanLII)
                                Date: 2012-07-19
                                Docket: FS-08-00340601-0000
                                URL: CanLII - 2012 ONSC 3311 (CanLII)
                                Citation: L.L. v. M.C., 2012 ONSC 3311 (CanLII)

                                Comment

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