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Divorce & Family Law This forum is for discussing any of the legal issues involved in your divorce.

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  #1  
Old 09-18-2019, 11:18 PM
Mom 2 Two Mom 2 Two is offline
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Default School Parental Apps

Ok... is it normal for the gf of your ex to add herself to all the school apps that teachers use to communicate with the “parents”. She even used my ex’s last name.
Any step moms or dads on here communicate with their step kids teachers?


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  #2  
Old 09-19-2019, 03:39 PM
Selfrepmom Selfrepmom is offline
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My ex’s gf did. My daughter’s school uses the SeeSaw app, so when she started school last year I gave my ex the sign in info. Lo and behold it’s his gf that signed up for it. I think because she already had an account (her kids school uses the same app).
I can always tell whether it’s her or my ex leaving comments on photos etc based on spelling and grammar lmao. Sometimes they’ll leave double comments on the same pic, both under her name. 3/4 of the time it’s her commenting though.

It did strike me as a little strange (I wouldn’t dream of doing it with my boyfriend’s daughters, his ex would have my head lol) but I never let it bother me. I mean realistically he could have signed up under his own name and still shared all the info with her.

Definitely another example of your ex’s gf butting her nose in where it doesn’t belong, but ultimately it’s your ex’s decision to give her that power. Don’t let it bother you
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Old 09-20-2019, 07:15 AM
Mom 2 Two Mom 2 Two is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Selfrepmom View Post
My ex’s gf did. My daughter’s school uses the SeeSaw app, so when she started school last year I gave my ex the sign in info. Lo and behold it’s his gf that signed up for it. I think because she already had an account (her kids school uses the same app).

I can always tell whether it’s her or my ex leaving comments on photos etc based on spelling and grammar lmao. Sometimes they’ll leave double comments on the same pic, both under her name. 3/4 of the time it’s her commenting though.



It did strike me as a little strange (I wouldn’t dream of doing it with my boyfriend’s daughters, his ex would have my head lol) but I never let it bother me. I mean realistically he could have signed up under his own name and still shared all the info with her.



Definitely another example of your ex’s gf butting her nose in where it doesn’t belong, but ultimately it’s your ex’s decision to give her that power. Don’t let it bother you


Thanks for the feedback... nice to know it’s not just my ex who has a controlling partner.

I called the school. Sent them the paperwork showing I have custody. She has been removed. They were quite concerned that she used a false last name.

If and when they get married... then ok maybe...
also the teacher informed me of their lies... saying they had not been given anything for the start of school. That they had to ask their son when meet the teacher night is???

It’s funny I keep all my emails and the second day of school when all the paperwork comes home as per usual it’s always scanned and emailed to dad and gf’s joint email account.


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Old 09-20-2019, 10:07 AM
Selfrepmom Selfrepmom is offline
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Originally Posted by Mom 2 Two View Post
also the teacher informed me of their lies... saying they had not been given anything for the start of school. That they had to ask their son when meet the teacher night is???

It’s funny I keep all my emails and the second day of school when all the paperwork comes home as per usual it’s always scanned and emailed to dad and gf’s joint email account.


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Why aren’t you just instructing the school/teacher to send dad this info directly? My boyfriend’s daughters teacher emails him every week with updates etc. my daughter’s school does the same with my ex. They even send out two report cards for us. I have ZERO interest in being the middle man between my ex and our daughter’s school because

A) It means I have 1 more reason why I need to communicate with him
B) It opens up another avenue of criticism (you didn’t give me document A, why wasn’t I informed of event B) My babysitting duties with him ended when I left his ass. He’s a big boy, and so is your ex. Let them communicate with the school and figure it out themselves. Remove yourself from the equation.

As for the app issue- good that they removed her, but guaranteed someone that controlling will just sign up a new account under your ex’s name and continue to monitor everything.
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Old 09-20-2019, 10:12 AM
Mom 2 Two Mom 2 Two is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Selfrepmom View Post
Why aren’t you just instructing the school/teacher to send dad this info directly? My boyfriend’s daughters teacher emails him every week with updates etc. my daughter’s school does the same with my ex. They even send out two report cards for us. I have ZERO interest in being the middle man between my ex and our daughter’s school because



A) It means I have 1 more reason why I need to communicate with him

B) It opens up another avenue of criticism (you didn’t give me document A, why wasn’t I informed of event B) My babysitting duties with him ended when I left his ass. He’s a big boy, and so is your ex. Let them communicate with the school and figure it out themselves. Remove yourself from the equation.



As for the app issue- good that they removed her, but guaranteed someone that controlling will just sign up a new account under your ex’s name and continue to monitor everything.


The teachers and principals were definitely instructed to communicate with dad.

I sent the info at begin of school as a courtesy. I won’t be sending anything. Dad is also signed up for the apps... as I can se his name. So if she needs to know she can get updates from dad. Not directly from the teachers.


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Old 09-20-2019, 10:32 AM
rockscan rockscan is offline
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Im telling you all that these women are simply control freaks who are also trolling you.

They didn’t get what they wanted in court the other day so now they are determined to push themselves into everything possible as a way to fuck with you.

Ask yourself this—can you prove that you did enough to ensure they had the info? If the answer is yes then stop worrying about it. Who cares if these people are on apps, sending emails or going to the school? Are you angry because they are pushy and controlling? If yes then take a deep breath. If you get rattled by someone as insecure as your ex’s new partner then you have lost focus.

They are only doing this to say “we had to go and get it from the school ourselves”. The judge will say “so”?

Let them get the info. Let dad show up. You can’t argue dad doesn’t take an interest and then get angry when his gf forces him to do so. It is not going to have an impact on your case. Getting info from the school is not a material change.

In other words, let it go. Ignore. Move on. Find something else to do. Laugh at their stupidity.
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Old 09-20-2019, 10:41 AM
Berner_Faith Berner_Faith is offline
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My step kids school doesn’t use an app, but they do have a FB page... I follow the pages for updates and important info... my husband has FB but doesn’t really use it, his ex also rarely passes along info and other than report cards the school doesn’t mail double info... so if I see something on the FB I do send it to my husband and he’ll ask his ex about it... I guess the difference is anyone can like a FB page, the app seems like a more personal student portal though so I see that as different


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Old 09-20-2019, 10:53 AM
Mom 2 Two Mom 2 Two is offline
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Originally Posted by Berner_Faith View Post
My step kids school doesn’t use an app, but they do have a FB page... I follow the pages for updates and important info... my husband has FB but doesn’t really use it, his ex also rarely passes along info and other than report cards the school doesn’t mail double info... so if I see something on the FB I do send it to my husband and he’ll ask his ex about it... I guess the difference is anyone can like a FB page, the app seems like a more personal student portal though so I see that as different


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Exactly... there are several places where they both can get information... I sent them the link that actually fills in on your phone calendar as to school events. We have Twitter and Facebook school pages as well. The app is a direct link to the teacher. And sure dad should most definitely use this. But for a non step mom to add herself separately with dads last name... is just more overstepping.


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Last edited by Mom 2 Two; 09-20-2019 at 11:05 AM.
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Old 09-20-2019, 11:51 AM
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Janus Janus is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mom 2 Two View Post
Ok... is it normal for the gf of your ex to add herself to all the school apps that teachers use to communicate with the “parents”. She even used my ex’s last name.

I think that is between the dad and the gf.


My ex has her long term boyfriend on those apps. I may or may not like it, but that is not my call.
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Old 09-20-2019, 01:40 PM
iona6656 iona6656 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mom 2 Two View Post
I called the school. Sent them the paperwork showing I have custody. She has been removed. They were quite concerned that she used a false last name.
Are you sure you should be doing that?

I mean- it kinda looks a bit (re: a lot) high conflict. If your file ends up at trial- they could end up spinning this as you being uber controlling and not even allowing information to be passed to the gf. It feels gatekeeper'ish.

Does her having the information interfere with your boys in any way? Or is it just her flexing?
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