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Divorce & Family Law This forum is for discussing any of the legal issues involved in your divorce.

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  #31  
Old 07-02-2019, 02:19 PM
iona6656 iona6656 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by phatkid77 View Post
Good call. Thanks
And he will 100% he doesn’t care. Just wants child.
Meeting with CAS as well, let’s be honest if she’s SOOOO WORRIED... why has she not filed a report?


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Because she actually sounds like she's getting pretty sound legal advice. If he doesn't see the kid more than a couple hours a week- where's the issue that CAS needs to address?

Why is HE meeting with CAS? Is she a threat to the child. If not, what's the issue?
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  #32  
Old 07-02-2019, 02:29 PM
phatkid77 phatkid77 is offline
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Sounds legal advice based off her stories..

Yeah, given the exchanges the last couple days. Safety may be a concern as there’s a down ward trend of her messages having nothing to do with visitation just slinging mud.
The BIG issue is getting 4hr a WEEK with his child Becasue she feels she can dictate
Because her lawyer said she can
That he will be piss tested
Forced to take medication
Forced into counselling
Supervised visits
And on and on and on


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  #33  
Old 07-02-2019, 02:36 PM
iona6656 iona6656 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by phatkid77 View Post
Sounds legal advice based off her stories..

Yeah, given the exchanges the last couple days. Safety may be a concern as there’s a down ward trend of her messages having nothing to do with visitation just slinging mud.
The BIG issue is getting 4hr a WEEK with his child Becasue she feels she can dictate
Because her lawyer said she can
That he will be piss tested
Forced to take medication
Forced into counselling
Supervised visits
And on and on and on


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Custody and access issues are not CAS issues. Is there an actual concern about the safety of the child?
If there's not- he's going to look really bad if he calls CAS on her, unfounded.
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  #34  
Old 07-02-2019, 02:39 PM
phatkid77 phatkid77 is offline
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This was “unofficial” advice from police friend
Said call CAS and police and get them on your side first since she’s so off the wall (this was couple weeks ago)


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  #35  
Old 07-02-2019, 02:44 PM
phatkid77 phatkid77 is offline
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Just a sad state of affairs people act like this.
Could be argued child is being neglected or form of abuse by with holding child from the other parent. Aka. Parent is having mental issues.
NEEEDS to be a better system for newly separated families when there is no schedule and the child is used as pawn


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  #36  
Old 07-02-2019, 02:45 PM
iona6656 iona6656 is offline
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^ there is. see below. there's actually decent resources out there- and a lot of them are free through different agencies- or you pay what you can afford.
Quote:
Originally Posted by phatkid77 View Post
This was “unofficial” advice from police friend
Said call CAS and police and get them on your side first since she’s so off the wall (this was couple weeks ago)


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I'm not a family lawyer- but that sounds like really bad advice.

What you COULD ask CAS for help with is resources for parents in conflict. Say there is a history of unhealthy behaviours from the party- and he is committed to addressing them in healthiest way possible - to benefit their very young daughter. Ask about courses- or family help programs.

There is a program called Families in Transition- offered through Catholic Family Services- reach out to them.

Coming from a shit situation prior to separation- with respect to family violence- my advice to your friend is to work on being a good dad. I'm not implying he isn't. But obviously there were some issues that exposed the kid to not great situations. I did that too- I let my daughter witness some pretty awful situations. Putting all blame aside (and her dad is the dick in the situation, make no mistake)- her dad and I need to fix our shit if she's going to go between us. Maybe try to fix their situation IN CONJUNCTION with securing appropriate parenting time. IF it's possible. But even if it's not- hey, he tried. That has to look good to a court.

Last edited by iona6656; 07-02-2019 at 02:48 PM.
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  #37  
Old 07-02-2019, 02:53 PM
phatkid77 phatkid77 is offline
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Yes agreed.
I really like the offer for counselling with a schedule and the parenting course ect.
But it will 100% be a no, which as said, has to look good for us

Here’s one.. how is this beneficial... let’s say no urgent motion granted. There is no schedule..

So if he picks child up today and instead of meeting demands and dropping off after supper.... WHAT if he says nope. I’m spending my time with child (obviously call police ahead of time to warn of impending panic call)
With no agreed upon schedule... they could both play this “game” and it’s of NO benefit to anyone...


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  #38  
Old 07-02-2019, 02:58 PM
iona6656 iona6656 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by phatkid77 View Post
Yes agreed.
I really like the offer for counselling with a schedule and the parenting course ect.
But it will 100% be a no, which as said, has to look good for us

Here’s one.. how is this beneficial... let’s say no urgent motion granted. There is no schedule..

So if he picks child up today and instead of meeting demands and dropping off after supper.... WHAT if he says nope. I’m spending my time with child (obviously call police ahead of time to warn of impending panic call)
With no agreed upon schedule... they could both play this “game” and it’s of NO benefit to anyone...


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I'll tell you what my ex and his really high-priced lawyer did. They hit me with an application quickly asking for shared custody and parenting time as the court found appropriate.

People can mud sling all they want- is she ready to put her accusations down before the court (if she's as nutty as you say- then probably yes, she is). But he can push forward with an application for joint custody and shared physical custody.

Were they married?

File the materials necessary to establish custody and access time.

I wouldn't start playing the keeping the kid game.
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  #39  
Old 07-02-2019, 03:22 PM
phatkid77 phatkid77 is offline
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Well that’s exactly what’s going to happen
Serve her with shared custody request and hope the courts hear it quickly.
CAS said no to the game as well. Amber alert equals sole custody
Yes they are married

He’s already offered a couple things and it’s always no
“I can’t wait to take you to court”
So unfortunately. Likely will end up there and the calmer more reasonable heads prevail



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  #40  
Old 07-02-2019, 03:33 PM
Selfrepmom Selfrepmom is offline
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What Iona just said.

Focus on filing the application and getting to your first case conference. Once there the judge will likely make her agree to some sort of temporary schedule

In the meantime..... keep every single toe in line. Get him to write out a schedule for himself concerning contact with daughter maybe? Ie:

Monday: Email ex “Dear shit for brains, I would like to take xxxx from Friday at 5 until Saturday at 5. If that does not fit your schedule, Saturday at 5 until Sunday at 5 also works for me. If you do not specify which option works best for you, I will be there Friday at 5 to pick xxxx up. I have also attached my proposed 50/50 parenting time schedule for your review” Do not respond to any emails back from her unless they have a 50/50 parenting schedule proposal and/or has agreed to one of the weekend visit times

Tuesday: Email ex “Dear shithead, I will be calling this evening at xxxPM to speak with xxxx briefly” Then call at that time, and journal document the outcome. If ex gets on phone and tries to engage him, hang up

Wednesday: Email ex: “Dear Scum of the Earth, I have not received a response on whether a Friday or Saturday evening pick up is more acceptable for you. Therefore, I will be at the home at 5pm Friday to pick xxxx up. Ps. I will also be calling xxxx to speak to her tomorrow evening at xxxPM”

Thursday: Email ex: “Dear Regret, please find attached again my proposal of a 50/50 parenting schedule below. I would also like to inform you that I will be attending xxxx co parenting course. I feel that it would be beneficial for both of us to get on board with this for best interests of xxx. PS don’t forget I will be calling to speak to xxx at xxxPM tonight”

Friday: Email Ex “ Dear Worst Nightmare, Please be reminded that I will be at your home at 5pm this evening to pick up xxxx. I will return her to your home at 5pm Saturday” Then show up with a witness. Carry a tape recorder/phone. Knock on door, if ex answers and says no, calmly say ok, walk away and document

Saturday/Sunday: Give Satan’s Spawn a two day email break. Use this time to study family law



Do not keep the child. DO NOT even threaten to keep the child.
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