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Divorce Support This forum is for discussing the emotional aspects of divorce: stress, anger, betrayal of trust and more.

View Poll Results: What was the main reason for your relationship breakdown?
Financial issues 61 22.85%
Inactive parent 34 12.73%
Different parenting styles 37 13.86%
Clashing personalities 79 29.59%
Addiction (gambling, alcohol, drugs) 54 20.22%
Spousal and/or child abuse 53 19.85%
Other 111 41.57%
Multiple Choice Poll. Voters: 267. You may not vote on this poll

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  #151  
Old 07-23-2011, 12:44 AM
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May_May May_May is offline
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Lack of communication, conversation, pulling his arm back or body if I touched his arm or back when I walked by, disrepect, lieing...I imagine it was similiar to being married to a caveman ! ha... After 11 years I stopped ignoring it as the kids started to make comments...2 more years where I was as frigid and disconnected as I could possibly be on purpose, along with his from above-great combination lead to the end...
  #152  
Old 08-17-2011, 08:28 PM
dmom dmom is offline
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What we believe are 'reasons' a marriage breaks down, are actually our own demons. When we start being honest with ourselves, and stop trying to make excuses, our lives will get back on track and we may have a real chance at finding happiness.
  #153  
Old 08-18-2011, 08:16 PM
High Road High Road is offline
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My marriage seems to have had the same problems as many others here. He lied, stole from me, spent every cent we had, and on an on. In the end I realized it wasn't a myriad of problems, it was his insecurties. His lack of self esteem, hidden by a falxe bravado were the root of all our problems, and unfortunately, are still causing problems.
  #154  
Old 09-04-2011, 03:02 AM
ddol1 ddol1 is offline
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Default lost Dreams.....

never thought i would post here but hey why not!

We had our ---- sorry my stbx had her dream of being a stay at home mom, like her mom. Stbx's best years were the years from 0-2....maybe three when every child begins the slow journey to independance. But here someone wrote - too bad dude you hitched up with the wrong gal. Tough but 4 years in and third on the way was the first time i really thought why?

Ignore, the best i could, the not so good as one must accept people for who they are - good and well the not so good. Try hard at making the good things better and then like pulling the carpet from under your feet - I was involved in what I know now as my "chance" accident - actually it was more of an injury from doing everything right that day. 5, 6? years of struggle but the "cap was off the marker" and the writing was on the wall. Figurative yes but a good way at looking at how everything really did change when we discovered that her dream was not going to be what she expected. She was going to have to go back to work.... even if was just part time - just in case. 10 more years of fighting with all I had - but it was finally time.

My marriage ended the day I - She said over and over that it didn't matter. But it did. We were an active couple - no rock climbing or bungie jumping but we were out there doing something, walking, hiking, off to the Rockies when we could. Now I can barely just make it walking (at a cane's pace)around the block.

I will always remember the day I cried. The day when I knew in my heart I had nothing more to give, I realized even then that our lives were never going to be the same or what we had dreamed (but then does anyone?)

Drawn out - yes. Our marriage ended that fateful day three months before our marriage even took place. The seed was planted, 15 years later it was time. I have never worked since. My wife now had the role that would change her. I now had the role that would change me. I had taken over her dream. After getting through so much together - it is finally time we find our own new dreams.
  #155  
Old 11-10-2011, 12:11 PM
theNo1Bet theNo1Bet is offline
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Lies...etc.
  #156  
Old 11-24-2011, 11:33 AM
moocow moocow is offline
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Default Infidelity

I cannot believe this is not one of the check boxes,my ex had an affair, we seeked councelling and it appeared to be dealt with for a few years even to the point of taking a family trip to Hawaii(where she was even suggesting looking for a new wedding band for me!!). 3 months after returning i caught her in a new affair !! THAT needless to say was the last of our marriage....fool me once,shame on me...fool me twice,shame on you!
  #157  
Old 11-24-2011, 01:02 PM
theNo1Bet theNo1Bet is offline
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So sorry to hear...hope you are making a better life for yourself!
  #158  
Old 12-06-2011, 03:52 PM
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I have to agree with Scrapmom....there wasn't just one issue and the stress of all the issues just took it's toll. I have always been a believer that a differnce can be made if you tried. I tried....but had an unwilling partner. I think it goes to show the same in divorce as he's still fighting for things after two and half years and I'm ready to settle and have been!
  #159  
Old 12-20-2011, 01:33 AM
runaway runaway is offline
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Infidelity
  #160  
Old 12-20-2011, 10:56 AM
fireweb13 fireweb13 is offline
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All of the above...
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