Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

First day of school...good luck

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • #31
    Originally posted by Straittohell View Post
    I certainly hope that you don't cave to her ridiculous demands.
    Nope. Not her ridiculous demands, ridiculous threats, or accusations.

    Comment


    • #32
      Originally posted by Serene View Post
      And I feel your pain.
      Sometimes, I find it insulting when you equate a stepparents pain to that of a parent. To be clear, as the parent of a child of divorce, I don't think you feel my pain, nor do I think you feel the pain of my ex as a parent to our child. And I find it both presumptive and belittling of you to assume your frustrations dealing with a stepchild/an ex that is not yours, to be equivalent to those of mine and my ex when dealing with and parenting our child.

      I'm curious, in 20 years, do you see these stepchildren of yours including you in their marriage ceremonies, being at the births of their children, walking them down an aisle? Exactly where do you position your stepmothers' place?
      Start a discussion, not a fire. Post with kindness.

      Comment


      • #33
        So let me get this straight: I don't feel your pain because I'm a step parent? And you have chosen to disregard that I too have children of my own and I too am divorced? And there is just no way I would have any clue what pain anyone is going through because I didn't birth my husband kids and nor do I feel/sense know any of the pain my husband or any of OUR (his/mine/their) children experience because of divorce?

        Who said my experiences are equivalent to yours? Before you go poking at me calling me out for assuming things - where exactly did I say any of this was equivalent?

        As for the rest of your questions - they are just silly. I don't "position myself" at all and I'm surely no fortune teller!

        Comment


        • #34
          Actually what is more interesting is you assumed my posts (even the ones that don't exist) were aimed at you personally!

          Comment


          • #35
            Originally posted by mcdreamy View Post
            Sometimes, I find it insulting when you equate a stepparents pain to that of a parent. To be clear, as the parent of a child of divorce, I don't think you feel my pain, nor do I think you feel the pain of my ex as a parent to our child. And I find it both presumptive and belittling of you to assume your frustrations dealing with a stepchild/an ex that is not yours, to be equivalent to those of mine and my ex when dealing with and parenting our child.

            I'm curious, in 20 years, do you see these stepchildren of yours including you in their marriage ceremonies, being at the births of their children, walking them down an aisle? Exactly where do you position your stepmothers' place?
            Im not sure if this is a personal attack for personal reasons. Regardless, your statement about step parents are personal and not all situations can relate to your personal experience.

            I find that this forum is turning out to be more of a Soap Opera where ones point of view or question turns into a bitch fest between senior members.

            There are still people out there who turn to this forum for assistance. And I would think that as a "Moderator" your position here is to govern the forum. Yet you and other senior members seem to enjoy the misfortune of others by a vindictive post like the one I quoted.

            I agree with Serene and dad2bandm. Its terrible and I myself deal with the very similar nonsense on a daily. And now with my GF expecting in a few months? I sense its only going to get worse. And my GF is a GREAT step mom to my child. My Child enjoys her very much. Is it fair to my child that the ex speaks horrible about my GF ?


            And I feel your pain.



            just my $0.02

            Comment


            • #36
              Originally posted by Serene View Post
              So let me get this straight: I don't feel your pain because I'm a step parent?
              That is exactly what I propose. I don't believe a stepparent feels similar pain to that of a parent who is undergoing a loss of or harm to their child.

              Originally posted by Serene View Post
              Who said my experiences are equivalent to yours? Before you go poking at me calling me out for assuming things - where exactly did I say any of this was equivalent?
              You did. Right here:
              Originally posted by Serene View Post
              I was instructed by mom not to do homework with the children. Apparently it is not a stepmother's place...

              Your situation has very little to do with logic. Its about control. You can't win unfortunately. And I feel your pain.
              and as to this:
              Originally posted by Serene View Post
              Actually what is more interesting is you assumed my posts (even the ones that don't exist) were aimed at you personally!
              What can I say, another conspiracy in the works? It's not personal, it's a blase and offhand comment I have made based on your continued postings about your stepchildren and frustrations with your new partner's ex. I remain more interested in where you see yourself and your role in 10 or 20 years with these stepchildren. Do you think you will have established a bond with them that is commensurate with that of their mother or their father?
              Start a discussion, not a fire. Post with kindness.

              Comment


              • #37
                I speak about my husband's ex because she is troublesome. My ex behaves and everyone co parents civilly even when there is disagreement.

                At no point did I ever say anything in my situation was equivalent to yours. At no point did I ever say anything in my situation was equivalent to anyone else's. It's not rocket science - you have provided quotes that do not provide the text you are trying to cite/infer.

                You'll continue to remain interested in where I see myself in 20 years, which by the way is not limited to "my stepchildren" but actually would likely entail "my family" without distinction to who gave birth to whom.... because I will/have not even thought that far ahead. But I will offer you this: I already have a bond with these children. And I would never equate a mathematical formula to my bond being equivalent or commensurate with either of their parents. Only a fool would do that. Its also not a competition.

                Comment


                • #38
                  Originally posted by OntarioDaddyMan View Post
                  ...Im not sure if this is a personal attack for personal reasons. Regardless, your statement about step parents are personal and not all situations can relate to your personal experience.

                  I find that this forum is turning out to be more of a Soap Opera where ones point of view or question turns into a bitch fest between senior members.

                  There are still people out there who turn to this forum for assistance. And I would think that as a "Moderator" your position here is to govern the forum...
                  Agreed.
                  And this original poster of this thread, would appreciate moderators and others to not derail the thread. If you wish to snipe at each other, go start your own thread.

                  Comment


                  • #39
                    Originally posted by Straittohell View Post
                    ...
                    I asked him how he felt about being in the teachers class again and he was positive...

                    ...I plan to meet with the teacher soon and get a sense of where things are at.

                    Original question stands, anyone else experienced something like this before?
                    Did you meet with the teacher about this yet?
                    I don't have any experience with myself, or the other parent(s) wanting to switch teachers.

                    Probably talking to the teacher directly, or maybe a sit-down with the teacher and principal, would be best, as sometimes they make these decisions to put certain kids with certain teachers, as they think it would work best for the child. It could be something like that.

                    When my daughter was in kindergarten, going from JK to SK, her teacher wanted to make sure, that she continued to have her, for SK as well, as she was making some good progress with her.

                    Comment


                    • #40
                      Chatted briefly with the teacher. She is very pleased with my little guy's behaviour, but does think he needs to catch up a bit. She suggested a meeting with us to discuss learning strategies, which is what I wanted.

                      Ex has mostly given up the switching bit, but isn't exactly leaping towards the meeting.

                      Part of me wonders if she wants to do as much inaction as possible so that my kids run into problems at their school, as she moved herself out of the area, and dearly wishes that she could put them in the school down the street from her house.

                      Of course, I don't consent, and she knows it, and our agreement states that we must both agree on a change.

                      Comment


                      • #41
                        Originally posted by Straittohell View Post
                        Chatted briefly with the teacher. She is very pleased with my little guy's behaviour, but does think he needs to catch up a bit. She suggested a meeting with us to discuss learning strategies, which is what I wanted.

                        Ex has mostly given up the switching bit, but isn't exactly leaping towards the meeting...
                        I would make sure to take advantage of the teacher meeting. If your ex attends, great. If she doesn`t, oh well. You can always pass on the teacher`s recommendations to her, via email, to keep her in the loop.

                        Teachers are busy folks, so if they are willing to sit down with you, to discuss your child, take advantage of it.

                        Comment

                        Our Divorce Forums
                        Forums dedicated to helping people all across Canada get through the separation and divorce process, with discussions about legal issues, parenting issues, financial issues and more.
                        Working...
                        X