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  • #16
    Originally posted by CycleDad View Post
    In oder to move from child seat to booster seat the law only specifies weight of over 18kg but I'm going to check how well my child fits into the car seat as far as lenght.
    I just went through the same thing wit my ex...she is just plain lazy, and uses convenience over safety on numerous occasions.

    My issue was going from booster to no booster, my child was approx 20lbs under, 9 inches too short and a year away. I found out through the children of course and this had been going on since the prior school year. So I email her, she ignored sending a response that my son's pediatrician said it was okay. Since I just had him onto the doctors a couple of months back, his weights, hight was just recorded, so I asked the name...she never responded! Just a big ass liar as usual, who need to put the blame of her stupid or lazy behaviors on someone else.

    Anyway, after shaming her, and warning her that there would be no place she could hide on this earth if she got into an accident and because of her laziness my child was hurt, the very first thing I heard from my child was mom was now using a booster seat again...but it was my fault of course...okay...I can take the fault of that one...it's for their safety. Also it is no stretch that my ex would or could be in an accident as he has already wrecked a few vehicles, and had a 50K+ on her record

    As for the law...there are speed limits...but if the road condition do not permit the MAX speed, you can still get a ticket, I guess where I am getting at, just because you child meets on of the criteria...you're in an accident...your child gets hurt...you're still responsible to ensure that your children was properly restrained, and my bet is "my child met the weight by a kilo" would not hold water. Not to mention, and most importantly, you child is injured or dead! For what? Laziness? Stupidity??

    Call CAS, or wait until she pulls out of the driveway and call the police, give them her plate number and explain that she is refusing to retrain you child properly.
    Last edited by LostFather; 12-04-2010, 12:00 PM.

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    • #17
      Being so young causes some worry too, honestly court will take to long and likely do nothing. If you are truly worried say to hell with the issues it will cause and call the police on her. I would in a heart beat, your child's safety comes before all else. IF anything were to happen (God forbid) then you are going to feel responsible. Your child is to young to protect them self and if your ex is as incompetent a parent as she seems then it's up to you to make the sticky choices.

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      • #18
        Have you tried to call the police or at least try calling the dept that does safety checks for children car seats and find out what are your options. Then maybe email your findings then to the ex. Not sure what area you live in, maybe a call to the MTO?
        I had a number of safety issues that also went ignored until I brought them up in court. He would not listen to my worries or concerns, it was just him doing what was more convenient for him. Funny thing, he changed his ways, why? not because he saw the potential for danger, or said hey, she was right. His own immediate family members agreed with me, but of course that was only cause we wanted to cause problems ??? It was cause the lawyers told him to. Unfortunately they will not be around all the time.
        It saddens me that there are parents out there that take their own convenience before the issue of safety for our children. Some parents do everything they can to provide a safe environment while the other do whatever and you are suppose to keep your mouth shut.
        Last edited by tugofwar; 12-04-2010, 04:34 PM.

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        • #19
          I think you guys are right, I despise confrontation, but I have to do it. Avoiding confrontation is what got me into this whole marital problem (seperation/divorce).

          1) I'm going to send her the MTO link
          2) call the police to ticket her
          3) Call CAS

          I can't believe sometimes it comes to this.

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          • #20
            Thank you for this thread. I am going through the same thing with my ex. He has purchased a booster (just the seat kind, not the high back) for my almost 7 year old, who hovers between 38-40lbs. I still have him in a harnessed car seat, and will keep him there because the seat I have allows him to be in the harness until 65lbs. I'm pretty sure he will never see a booster seat in my car because he will be 8 before he reaches 65 lbs!

            I also hate confrontation (HATE IT!), but I do worry for my son's safety in his father's car, especially since they do a lot of highway driving, and now that winter is coming. I don't know why he chose to take him out of the car seat so soon, it's not easier as now my ex has to do up his seat belt as well as our younger son's when he could do it on his own before. I think it must be about cost (?) but don't know why he just wouldn't invest in a better (higher harnessed weight limit) since our younger son would be able to use it eventually as well.

            CycleDad - if you really want to send your ex a convincing argument you could try looking up those nasty youtube videos that demonstrate how a 5-point-harness is safer.

            Good luck.

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            • #21
              HI FFH,

              Just be sure that the top of the seat belt in the child seat is level or higher than your child's shoulders.

              Naw, I can't watch those videos.

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              • #22
                Just an update for historical searching purposes. I hope this is helpful.

                I contacted police and they said they would talk to the ex but that they would do nothing else. 1KG is not that much of a difference and they do not carry scales in the cruisers. So unless it is extremely obvious like no car seat at all nothing will be done by this regional police force.

                I contacted CAS. the worker said that 1kg may be accounted for by different calibrations in bathroom scales. I mentioned that I thought 2.2lbs is a big difference and not a reasonable assumption that two scales may be that far off. I also mentioned that our child was weighted at the doctor's office and it matched my scales closely. The worker maintained that i could be because of the error margin. The worker said she would give the ex a call. I tried following up with CAS but they refused to tell me what the outcome was or even if they called. CAS said because this issue was between separated/divorced parents, their policy is not to disclose what happened.

                Of course YMMV because of different polices in difference municipalities CAS and police forces.

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                • #23
                  My ex refuses to put our daughter into a proper seat as well. Last summer during an exchange I noticed that my ex put our daughter into a proper car seat but it was incredibly loose(enough to notice from 10 ft away). After I asked her to tighten it she did to that. Then she started using a booster seat (she had just turned 4 and was 32 lbs) I asked her several times, emailed her the link to the MTO and she would not respond at all. Contacted the police and the doctor and CAS and they would do nothing for me. She claims our daughter was 40 lbs at the time even though doctors records said she was 32 lbs, she is only 36 lbs now and she actually gets mad at me for putting her in the proper car seat because mommy says that she is a big girl. I told her its this or I can park the car and we walk everywhere together, she chose the car seat lol.

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