Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Vacation planning ... more stress

Collapse
This topic is closed.
X
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • Vacation planning ... more stress

    Or consent order says: We have first pick of summer vacation weeks this year. Plans are to be finalized by June 1.

    So I sent off an email last week with our plans: first week in July (Ontario), and first 2 weeks in August, departing Aug 1, (overseas).

    The ex responds: I'm going to France for the last 2 weeks in July. (so, she's basically made travel plans without checking first with me on our plans).

    Sure we can change our plans to delay our trip 2 weeks (to avoid back-to-back jetlag for our kid) ... but GRRRR!

    She has an aggravating history of ignoring our court order when it suits her...

    Thoughts?
    Last edited by dinkyface; 04-30-2011, 04:23 PM.

  • #2
    You could tell her you have made plans, and according to the court order, SHE is the one that must reschedule.

    Tried that?

    Comment


    • #3
      or just reply "Hope you have fun... who will be taking care of $child for the second week, or do you need me to keep him for that time?"

      Comment


      • #4
        I'm not understanding the problem.

        YOU want 1st week of July and 1st & 2nd week of August?

        EX wants 3rd & 4th week of July?

        So nothing is overlapping?

        Does your order say that the kids' must stay home for ___ # of days before travelling again?

        Comment


        • #5
          Originally posted by dinkyface View Post
          Sure we can change our plans to delay our trip 2 weeks (to avoid back-to-back jetlag for our kid) ... but GRRRR!


          Thoughts?
          Since when do kids get jetlag??????? I'm dragging my ass and the kid is saying "let's go, let's go!"

          tell her "that was kind of you to tell me what you're doing" DONE!

          Have a great time!

          Comment


          • #6
            I agree in the first chice and that kids don't get jetlag If your overseas plans are also in Europe just pick up the kids from France or fly them directly from there to where you.

            Comment


            • #7
              Originally posted by samej View Post
              I agree in the first chice and that kids don't get jetlag If your overseas plans are also in Europe just pick up the kids from France or fly them directly from there to where you.
              Booking an 'open jaw' flight for the child adds from $1800 to $2400 onto the child's airfare (compared to a regular Toronto-Europe return fare). I've spent a lot of time on airline websites and talking with ticket agents this weekend!

              Our next option is to book the child's ticket as: Toronto-France (with my ex), then France-Europe 2 weeks later (with us), then Europe-Toronto 2 weeks later (with us). Much cheaper. Will require some cooperation from the ex though to plan the booking/times/handover. But, this WILL save us money. I'll indicate her only other option would be to change her travel dates (as per our consent order). Or, pay for the extra $1800-$2400 above...

              The France handover is a big negative for the adults, since it means a longer layover in France (after an overnight - already brutal), and having to change airlines in France (and retrieve/recheck baggage, and exit/reenter customs), and probably, lower checked baggage allowances due to the France-Europe leg, and putting ourselves at the mercy of my ex showing up on time with our child.

              Just figuring out our options for proposal, but I'd say we are bending over backwards. If my ex blocks it, then we end up traveling in September - disturbing our kid's introduction to JK.

              Our kid DID have jetlag on the outbound - took a while before the sleep pattern normalized - was waking at 3am saying 'ITS WAKEP TIME!!!' - so grumpy the next day due to disturbed sleep. I don't know about the 'returning home' jetlag.
              Last edited by dinkyface; 05-01-2011, 08:08 PM.

              Comment


              • #8
                A one way home on Air Canada (or whatever large carrier you're using), combined with a discount carrier like Ryan Air or BMI Baby for the inter-EWurope transfer may be an alternative. You need to do directly to the Ryan Air web site. I think BMI Baby may be on Sabre since they're part of Britisj Airways, but do a check on that. We flew Ryan Air from Ireland to Spain some years back for under $100 euros...

                Comment


                • #9
                  Hi there,

                  1. Your ex should not have booked anything until you had given her your vacation dates. The fact is it was your year to get first choice on selection of vacation dates and that should have been followed. My Ex and I have a similar arrangement. I have had to fit everything around my ex's vacation dates this year. Yes, it is annoying to wait for someone to provide you with their dates and then plan around them, but it is fair. I get to pick first next year.

                  2. The cost of flying at this time of year to Europe is unbelievable. It is really difficult to find good priced tickets. If you are fortunate enough to get a good deal, you often can not make any changes.

                  3. However, as other posters have said, in an effort to resolve rather then escalate the situation, see if you can arrange a transfer of children in Europe, which will save them the additional trip of flying back and forth. This will require some co-operation between parents. I know my ex and I could never do this.

                  4. Children like other people do get tired and take time to adjust to the time change. My kids actually suffered from jet leg flying back from Europe but it wasn't too bad flying out there.

                  In respect to the need to rest between vacations, it all depends upon how "active" the kids were on their last day with ex and what you are planning for your first few days.

                  The children and I always return from our vacation a couple of days early before I hand them off to my ex, just so that the kids are not physically exhausted when they arrive at ex's house. They get an opportunity to rest before they head off to see the other parent who hasn't seen them for a while.

                  I hope all works out.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Thanks everyone for your responses and suggestions. It is reassuring to confirm that I'm not being unreasonable about this.

                    Am also very uneasy about permitting her to return to Canada within 7 days of our departure because of problems during our last trip (just over 2 months ago) - she refused to hand over the passport, and would not communicate about whether she would or would not give it, or why. We got in front of a judge 2 days before our departure, and boy was he pissed at her (or her lawyer). They had nothing credible to say for themselves.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Going great here....

                      She rejected my proposal, which meant for her
                      - extra 7h travel duration (2 extra connections - one is airline change) and $350 extra on her return (kid travels for only one hop). This requires a 5:30am wakeup to make an 8:30am flight.
                      - I pay the extra flight cost + $500 in compensation for time

                      Her return proposal means, for us:
                      - 7h extra travel duration (due to 1 airline change) and $200 extra on the outbound
                      - 9h extra travel duration (1 extra connection which is an airline change) and $300 extra on the return. This also requires a 3am wakeup to make a 6am flight. Kid also gets to endure this.
                      - no mention of $ compensation....

                      Airline change requires getting bags off, clearing customs, rechecking bags, and greater risk of missing the connection.

                      Amazing, given that we are the ones who have the first choice of weeks this summer.

                      Comment

                      Our Divorce Forums
                      Forums dedicated to helping people all across Canada get through the separation and divorce process, with discussions about legal issues, parenting issues, financial issues and more.
                      Working...
                      X