Originally posted by Justice4us
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Reform Needed NOW!
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Originally posted by Justice4us View PostI pay my ex the full tabled amount for two kids as she has primary care. We BOTH have good-paying jobs...I make bit more than her (on paper) but from what I gather she is close to a 6-figure salary herself through recent promotions etc. Her income is not considered at all when it comes to the amount I am required to pay her monthly. In addition, I drive one hour one way to pick up and drop off my kids every other weekend as she refuses to meet halfway.I am re-married with two stepchildren and my new wife does not receive child support. We had to purchase a new house big enough for us and our 4 children...it was important to me that the kids were comfortable when we were all together. After paying the ex the huge amount that I do for child support, we are able to pay our basic monthly expenses but do not have money for any of the extras...all the kids have to suffer somewhat because of this. Most of my disposable income goes to the ex, and from what the kids tell us, most of the time their fridge is empty. Their mother provides them with the basics and if they ask for anything more she tells them she does not have money. Meanwhile, we have been told that she has renovators fixing up her house, she has bought new furniture, tv's, computers, replaced her roof, fixed her driveway, bought a brand new car, and is searching for a new house. I will be needing a new car soon myself but have no idea how I will be able to pay for it.
I deposit the child support money into a joint account and have noticed that she only takes the money out in large sums, obviously whenever she wants to purchase a big ticket item. She is not at all accountable for how that money is spent...is this fair to anyone including the children?
Fair would be to determine the cost of raising a child on a monthly basis, look at each parents monthly income, and then determine what each parent should be contributing individually to find the difference.
Just a heads up-not every primary care parent has a low income and not every one of them is using the funds issued to them for the benefit of the children.
Something needs to be done to change the system so that the receiving parent is not enjoying a higher standard of living at the expense of a parent or family who is/are suffering financially, and to make the receiving parent accountable for how those funds are being spent.Originally posted by Justice4us View PostI am the new wife here...just FYI, I work full time and was self-sufficient before getting re-married. And by the way, I am one of those rare women who allowed my ex to have shared custody (half the time) and I did not request child support because I believed we should divide the children's expenses equally. I did not want to cause undue financial hardship for my ex or take his kids away from him. Right now my ex and I give my kids what we can...they don't get everything they want but we make it work. And no, I do not expect my new husband to give me a grand lifestyle...we share in the household expenses and make the best of our financial situation.
Be careful not to make judgements without all the facts.
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Originally posted by Justice4us View PostBe careful not to make judgements without all the facts.
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I'm not sure what the rational of not considering the receiver's income but in Quebec they do.
Quebec is way more fair with these things.
There is no accountability for child support, there could be but it would take a serious campaign. I haven't found any jurisdiction in the world that has child support accountability. I think this might because most of the time the issue is child support is so low (think 30k income) or not paid at all so maybe misspending money accounts for only 1% of CS cases.
The fact that the payee receive the government benefits also doesn't make sense to me. Consider the fact the PAYOR is the one who is paying the child support which is supposed to cover the needs of the child why does the Payee need the extra money.... In an intact house you would spend on your child's needs and get the tax benefits to help cover that cost.... Unless of course child support takes that into account but I haven't been able to find a reference.
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Originally posted by Links17 View PostThere is no accountability for child support, there could be but it would take a serious campaign. I haven't found any jurisdiction in the world that has child support accountability.
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Originally posted by arabian View PostWhat do we do about those MEN who continually create more children without properly looking after the ones they first created?
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It is getting late and I must be tired. The first and last posts do not make any sense. Is it me or are the facts messed up?
Or maybe they're the same person....lol.
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Reform Needed NOW!
The title itself tells me a lot about the state of mind of HE/SHE/IT. I'll bet that if HE/SHE/IT was diagnosed with some rare disease, HE/SHE/IT would expect a cure for it NOW!
I predict unfavorable results. ''Your honor, WE need a ruling NOW!!''
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I predict unfavorable results. ''Your honor, WE need a ruling NOW!!''
I would have felt a little more empathy had he been trying to figure out how to gain more access time with his real children or figure out a more equitable deal with driving time but nah, its him and his new wife whining about the ex getting CS.
Suffice to say, I won't be standing outside in the rain holding a sign and joining in a protest for this nonsense.
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In these situations the Ex/Custodial parent will not agree to extra parenting time with the other parent/Child Support Payor who pays top guideline support, and extraordinary expenses.
When the Child Support Payor is paying all those expenses, they then can't afford the legal/court fees involved in trying to get extra parenting time.
It also costs the child Support Payor/other parent expenses when they have their children too on top of what they already pay in CS. It probably costs me $150 every other weekend when I have my children in gas, food, activity expenses. I love my children and want as much time with them as I can get. I want them to enjoy their time with me.
I paid legal fees in getting weekend schedules with my children changed to work around my work schedule/as it had changed/ so ex then was denying me my weekend time. I also got holiday time set in place at this time, as ex had denied me Christmas.
Now because I got that extra time, I am at a point that I can go and try for more time........but it's very hard to come up with those funds in this situation.
My situation problem isn't being in a new spousal relationship....as I said previously, If I was single, I wouldn't be able to afford to live on my own based on my case. It is the past incidents between my Ex and I that I may never financially recover from. She got the house/ no buy out to me/ She lied to FRO, scammed me out of money that way/ She cancelled my car insurance--that was a $4,000 fine when I got pulled over, informed of it!
Oh and as far as contacting the government about ex being in a spousal relationship/ not claiming common law. Ex's spouse is not using the same address as her. So how would there be any proof for the Government about their situation?
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Yes, it takes two to make a baby...a man and a woman who both need to be responsible for the consequences of their actions, financially and otherwise.When I am talking about the unfairness of the system I am not referring to the 'deadbeats'...I am referring to the hard-working responsible men of this world who are getting screwed.
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