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  • legal help? a bad situation....

    My son is 13 and a half. Very mature. I have a joint custody agreement with his mother, my ex. Since my son was born we have moved from city'a' to city'b'(another country) to city'c' and back again to city 'b' due to her following her academic career. We were not together during this but i followed and took care of the child a minimum 50 percent of the time if not more. When we moved back to a City in b.c. My Sons grades at school deteriorated rapidly. He felt this was his way of rebelling against the stress and anxiety that his 'academic' mother put on him. His mother started controlling his time with me. We went from a week a week schedule to every other weekend. My son was devastated as was i. This lasted 6 months and then he forced the move back with me. He has lived with me full time for the last year. He hated that city and was dying to leave. In the summer on a trip here to Ottawa, he decided this was his home. he was here every summer since he was a child, his only constant in his life... and he was very close to my large family. I had to FORCE him to leave in the summer.Returning to grade 8 he started skipping school, being late and getting horrible grades. Begging me to move to Ottawa. he had stress headaches from the anxiety from his mother and his schooling. He finally told myself and a therapist that his mother was so forceful about school she berated him and physically accosted him a few times. He even openly talked about killing himself because the stress and anxiety was so bad.I had him stay with her for a weekend when i travelled and he ran away when i was out of the city. He stayed over at her house four times in the year.

    So ... flash forward to December. He tells his mother he never wants to see her, he hates her and he is not coming back. She allows (?) him to go to Ottawa for christmas break. He vows to never go back to his old city. He flies alone to Ottawa

    Now He refuses to come back to his B.c. home with me... and wants a new start. after a few weeks of trying to figure out this problem i realize i need to settle him and put him in school, he will not return ( you cant even make a 13 year old brush their teeth!). I find him a great school and let the school know our situation. He is happy and is never late and is doing well at school and has tons of friends. One month in nothing from his mother... i start to take care of the legal situation, but it is not as quick as i had hoped and duty counsel refused to help me at the court house because they assumed i kidnapped a kid. Well, i now get served an ex-partie notice to return My son to b.c. in 72 hours. It was served to a member of my family, i got it 12 hours later. I run to duty counsel, back to legal aid...back and forwards. 4 DAYS LATER legal aid still doesnt get back to me and Duty counsel wont help because they dont claim Jurisdiction or see the danger of my son being returned to b.c. and his threat to run away if he does.My 72 hours expires! i finally got a judge to look at my motions and application and forwarded my proof that legal aid never helped me although i qualified and the judge ordered the b.c. notice that the child be returned be followed. Speaking with the police that called me and spoke to my son seperately... they realize the absurdity of a child being returned to a place he will not go.

    How can i get someone to hear my sons side? He is 13 and refuses to go back. i have the weekend to figure out something for him. I will comply with this order but i cannot force him. He simply will not go...

    Long huh?... so ... anyone?

  • #2
    The Office of the Childrens Lawyer. Your son would be old enough now. They represent only the child and expense is covered by the province. Speak to Legal aide to find out about them in your area.

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