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  • #31
    Or maybe it's not the difference in dentists, as much as a difference in the procedures?

    My daughter has had all kinds of dental work done, and although she didn't like it, she made it through.

    With the extraction, something didn't add up. She insisted, through dreadful screams, that she could still feel the pain of the tooth being pulled, despite having had the local freezing inserted via a needle.

    It took myself AND my ex holding her down to get the tooth out. The dentist admitted that the freezing isn't always enough for some patients, and recommended GA.

    This sounds pretty similar to me.

    There was no "tricking" my daughter. We tried to convince her that the pain was just in her head, and being caused by her fear, (as has been suggested by other folks on this thread) but her pain receptors apparently didn't agree. Even if it really was in our daughter's head, my ex and I decided that avoiding traumatizing our kid was more important than our egos and self satisfaction in making her go through something that made her feel terrible.

    Why do people find it so hard to believe that this might be the case for the OP's kid? Why try to explain away her parental instinct on this?

    This should be such an open and shut matter. She's deciding, to pay the extra costs of GA, and the father, who isn't even paying for it, is only objecting because, when he was that age, he didn't need that kind of "sissy" stuff. Because, surely, his son is exactly the same person he is. Yeah, never seen that end in disaster before. Not too hard to figure out who is sitting on the right side of the fence on this one.

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    • #32
      Originally posted by Straittohell View Post
      It is so funny to watch all of this well intentioned advice.

      Did all of those things with my daughter, and my ex and I were 100% o the..
      Maybe you thought you were both comfortable, with the dentist, and not "projecting", but then maybe your child also took queues from having both parents there, in the room, comforting her. That could also trigger a kid to think "oh oh...why are they both here, comforting me?".

      I find, what worked well, is for me to go in for appointment first, with the kids watching the dentist do a check-up on me and then the dentist can follow-up with them. Of course, this only works, if the parent(s), aren't afraid of the dentist as well....and if the dentist is agreeable to it (most are).

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      • #33
        Originally posted by dad2bandm View Post
        Maybe you thought you were both comfortable, with the dentist, and not "projecting", but then maybe your child also took queues from having both parents there, in the room, comforting her. That could also trigger a kid to think "oh oh...why are they both here, comforting me?".

        I find, what worked well, is for me to go in for appointment first, with the kids watching the dentist do a check-up on me and then the dentist can follow-up with them. Of course, this only works, if the parent(s), aren't afraid of the dentist as well....and if the dentist is agreeable to it (most are).
        She asked for both of us to be in the room because she was nervous (again, she's always been nervous about the dentist, but normally is happy with one or both parents present), and we told her yes. She was happy about it. She was doing great, right up until the dentist started to pull the tooth, and then she suddenly began screaming and thrashing in the chair.

        The dentist admitted that for some, the freezing doesn't work as well. She recommended GA, even though it meant going to another dentist in another city, and her losing the opportunity to make money off of us for the last two teeth that had to be pulled.

        Read this blog from an actual dentist, and the comments from various people underneath, to get an idea of the scope of the problem.

        Why Your Dentist Can’t Get You Numb | Oral Answers

        Note that there are many different factors that can limit the ability to properly freeze a tooth. Anxiety is listed as one of them, but there are plenty of medically related causes as well.

        I get that people are meaning well by trying to tell this OP that she simply needs to do a better job of assuaging her son's concerns, but it isn't always that simple.

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        • #34
          just for a heads up on the freezing..there has been a few times when the freezing never took properly. All I had to do was put up my hand, the dentist stopped and put some more freezing in.

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          • #35
            standing maybe you're a redhead? LOL

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            • #36
              Originally posted by arabian View Post
              standing maybe you're a redhead? LOL
              hmm nope I am a blonde but my mom is a strawberry blonde and there are redheads in my bloodline.

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              • #37
                Originally posted by standing on the sidelines View Post
                hmm nope I am a blonde but my mom is a strawberry blonde and there are redheads in my bloodline.
                How much do you weight?

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                • #38
                  Originally posted by The Iceberg View Post
                  How much do you weight?
                  what has that got to do with anything?? None of your business.

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                  • #39
                    Just asking, hair color is thread hijacking so i just wondered about your weight, no harm meant.

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                    • #40
                      Originally posted by The Iceberg View Post
                      Just asking, hair color is thread hijacking so i just wondered about your weight, no harm meant.
                      it wasn't thread hijacking..redheads are known to have issues with dental procedures because freezing isn't as effective on some. If the child is a redhead then maybe that is an issue also.

                      You hijacked the thread by asking a personal question about my weight, which has nothing to do with getting freezing in the mouth for a dental procedure.

                      Study: Redheads' extra pain may cause fear of dentists - CNN.com

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                      • #41
                        Apparently, redheads feel extra pain because they are the spawn of satan (thus the red hair) and when they get dental procedures it is the work of god's angels (the dentists; dressed in white, no less). Moral of the story is we should support the dentist crusade against redheads (right after we finish the family law revolution).

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                        • #42
                          I am a red head... just had a 4 root, root canal done today... took just over an hour... the worst part was the freezing at the beginning. After the initial pinch of the needle I didn't feel a thing. I had to see a specialist because I have extremely curved roots apparently and because of that a regular dentist could not do the procedure. 6 hours later and I feel a slight pain but not much.

                          I can understand why putting the child out would be the best option... it is a lot to sit there for an hour and have your mouth held open by bite blocks, you can barely swallow or breath at points. I certainly wouldn't want a child to experience what I did today. It wasn't so much the pain, but the length of the procedure.

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                          • #43
                            Do you both have joint custody? If so I you shouldn't be making decisions without his convent for a medical procedure that has the risks of being up under GA.

                            I did make the decision to have my daughter put under GA but it was after 2 consults and we were warned there was risks involved. She did have a reaction and if I had to do it again I am not sure i would.

                            If someone else made the choice to have my child put under GA without my approval I would be extremely upset. I am sure if the shoe was on the other foot and your ex made a decision that substantial without your approval you would do something about it.

                            I would be sure to talk with your ex about the situation and why you feel it is best. If need be have a consult with the dents just you and your ex. Hoepfully following that you both can agree on the best treatment.

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                            • #44
                              Good day everyone,
                              I just wanted to thank everyone for your opinions and advice. To give you a little recap of what I decided on, I went ahead without GA to see if it would go smoothly, and I let the Doctor know that at any point in time if S5 needed to be restrained in any way, the procedure needed to stop.

                              Got to the doctor's office, S5 was calm no anxiety at all. They had him pick out a movie so he could watch it on the overhead TV. The dental assistant administered the (very potent) cocktail of liquid drugs, and S5 was in Lala land. After he was given Oral anesthetics, he fidgeted but was so drugged up that he went straight back to watching spiderman. Te Doctor informed us that he was going to do the procedure in two steps, we waited for the oral numbing to do it's job and the the Doctor numbed again. Because this was a very large tooth with very long roots, the Doctor needed to "wiggle" it out and at this point S5 was still very drugged up. He squirmed a little bit while the tooth was being extracted but we did not need to restrain him. I have to say that the worst part of all this procedure was getting my son home. What a total relief, and S5 has absolutely no recollection of being at the Doctor's office!

                              And as for his father, well when he got to the office, he was under the impression that S5 was being put under GA, thus even after I had explained that we would try with the simpler awake procedure. Now in the room he questioned on how long S5 would be sleeping (goof)...After the extraction, I asked the clerk to divide the bill into two, I paid my part and he paid his, crisis averted and end of a crappy, emotional, nerve racking procedure.

                              So again, thank you for all the support in regards to my questions. Have a splendid day!

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                              • #45
                                Thanks for letting us know!

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