So here's the situation.
First iteration of final final settlement offer (broken down into severable sections- thanks to suggestions on here) is ready to go. BUT...still tyring to make sure I've covered everything...
and that's how I ended up here:
As I'm trying to let ex know what's going on in D2's life when she's with me- I mentioned at the weekend pick up that she's started swimming lessons- and loves it. I had asked months ago through OFW if he was okay with this- he was. He then said "Oh- if she likes the water- we can take her swimming here" (his mom's condo has a nice pool- but without a lifeguard).
I said "Oh- but have you learned to swim?" He said he can get some lessons... And he'll take her after he's done some lessons.
Ex cannot swim. And no one in his family can (including sister who is current visit supervisor).
I instantly wanted to tell him "fuck no, you can't". But instead I said "you know- it's probably better you only take her when there's a life guard present- until you're way more comfortable in the water". And then I bounced before it could turn into a thing.
Is it reasonable to put a stipulation in the parenting plan to say he can't take her swimming at all- without the presence of a lifeguard? Even then- I'm imaging places like Great Wolfe Lodge and I'm nervous about him being in situations with her around water where no one who's there actually knows how to swim- even with a lifeguard present but lots of people too.
I'm more inclined to say that he should never take her swimming. Period. Hard stop.
I know this is gatekeeper'ish...but I don't eff around with water safety. I was a lifeguard for five years when I was younger and I know how easy it is for toddlers to drown- and what's scarier is dry drowning. I don't think kids should be around water unless they're strong swimmers or have at least one adult who is a strong swimmer and knows the basics of lifesaving techniques around water.
Hill to die on?
First iteration of final final settlement offer (broken down into severable sections- thanks to suggestions on here) is ready to go. BUT...still tyring to make sure I've covered everything...
and that's how I ended up here:
As I'm trying to let ex know what's going on in D2's life when she's with me- I mentioned at the weekend pick up that she's started swimming lessons- and loves it. I had asked months ago through OFW if he was okay with this- he was. He then said "Oh- if she likes the water- we can take her swimming here" (his mom's condo has a nice pool- but without a lifeguard).
I said "Oh- but have you learned to swim?" He said he can get some lessons... And he'll take her after he's done some lessons.
Ex cannot swim. And no one in his family can (including sister who is current visit supervisor).
I instantly wanted to tell him "fuck no, you can't". But instead I said "you know- it's probably better you only take her when there's a life guard present- until you're way more comfortable in the water". And then I bounced before it could turn into a thing.
Is it reasonable to put a stipulation in the parenting plan to say he can't take her swimming at all- without the presence of a lifeguard? Even then- I'm imaging places like Great Wolfe Lodge and I'm nervous about him being in situations with her around water where no one who's there actually knows how to swim- even with a lifeguard present but lots of people too.
I'm more inclined to say that he should never take her swimming. Period. Hard stop.
I know this is gatekeeper'ish...but I don't eff around with water safety. I was a lifeguard for five years when I was younger and I know how easy it is for toddlers to drown- and what's scarier is dry drowning. I don't think kids should be around water unless they're strong swimmers or have at least one adult who is a strong swimmer and knows the basics of lifesaving techniques around water.
Hill to die on?
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