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General Chat This forum is for discussing anything that doesn't fit into another forum, or for discussing things that are off topic, or just for general venting.

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  #21  
Old 11-24-2013, 10:34 AM
Berner_Faith Berner_Faith is offline
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Want to point out where anyone said you were stupid because of bad English? You seem to get very defensive every time someone asks you a question. Problem is, no one is going to help you or offer their advice if you just respond negatively to every post.
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  #22  
Old 11-24-2013, 10:42 AM
Mess Mess is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by yahoo View Post
Court date in December 11 and I wanted help but as soon as I call my ex "cripple" I feel that bad feeling from people about being judged. .
"Cripple" is an unacceptable term. If you worked in government or at a university or college, or other public environment, you would fired for referring to people that way. This also includes private business that deals with the public. If a bank teller used that word they would be disciplined, and if they insisted on continuing to use the word (the way that you are doing) they would be fired.

It is no different than using racist words like "n*****."

I had to take a short course provided by the Ontario Government on how to treat people with disabilities in order to get my current job. I understand that you have no idea about these issues, but you should not feel victimized because you have been called out on it.

And to reflect back on your original post, people with disabilites should be able to come here for advice and not have to read that kind of language describing them.

Quote:
Appendix B: Talk about disabilities – Choose the right word
Words can influence and reinforce the public’s perception of people with disabilities. They can create a positive view of people with disabilities, or a negative view. Here are some tips that can help make your communication and interaction with people with all types of disabilities more successful:
• Use "disability" or "disabled," not "handicap" or "handicapped."
• Don’t use terms such as "retarded," "dumb," "psycho," "moron" or "crippled." These words are very demeaning and disrespectful to people with disabilities.
• Remember to put people first. It is proper to say "person with a disability," rather than "disabled person."
• If you are not sure about a disability, it’s better to wait until the individual describes their situation to you rather than make your own assumptions. Many types of disabilities have similar characteristics and your assumptions may be wrong.
For more information, visit
www.ontario.ca/AccessON
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  #23  
Old 11-24-2013, 10:44 AM
caranna caranna is offline
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Yahoo, I had also noticed (but did not want to point it out at that time), that your friend's writing shows restraint and common sense. I totally understand that you are defensive and somewhat angry, as we all can be that way in these difficult times. I'm not attacking your character or intelligence. You seem to be a good and intelligent person who has been through a lot.

If you have your friend post for awhile, you will get more help. In time you will calm down and have a clearer perspective. We've all been there and understand.
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  #24  
Old 11-24-2013, 11:01 AM
yahoo yahoo is offline
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I did not say that someone say I was stupid. I say generally people think that way when someone talk with not good English. I talk better then I write thow. Mess, I already apologize so no need to make this a issue. I explain why I said that and a little about my experience only to let other know hwre I come from. I don't say that or free to disable like that. People say thing in emotion and I do same when I feel people attack me.
I now this forum is good to help others but I also request to not read my lines like from someone who knows English all full. I translate in my head and try to write. If it looks rude don't mean I am rude.

Then I see moonlight and my feelings are more strong that people judge. I said what I feel and I understand from the people who answer kindly and explain. I then say apologize for remarks and still if you bring that up then I don't think I can get good help from here. It will instead make me feel more worse and confuse.

I do not now what else to say but to not take my writing as serious as you are.
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  #25  
Old 11-24-2013, 11:08 AM
yahoo yahoo is offline
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mess, My ex who is disable used to call me these names:
Retard, f$&k face, dumb, idiot, crazy a$$, b$&&ch, moron, c$&t, piece of $hit, crap, poopy, ignorant, stupid etc and the list is very long. U quoted:

"such as "retarded," "dumb," "psycho," "moron" or "crippled." These words are very demeaning and disrespectful to people with disabilities. "

What about people who are not ? And instead are the only pirson taking care of the "disable" who speak such words to me? What do law say about that?
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  #26  
Old 11-24-2013, 11:12 AM
Mess Mess is offline
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What I say to that is that originally you may not have understood that "cripple" was an unacceptable term.

I explained to you that it is, and why. I have given factual examples. I provided an quotation with a link to a government website that confirms what I am saying.

And after all of that, you are still arguing with me.

Giving an apology means nothing if you go on to keep justifying your original behaviour.

Your ex called you names, and you didn't like it, but you are using your ex as an example to justify your own language.

I am "appaulled."
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  #27  
Old 11-24-2013, 11:25 AM
yahoo yahoo is offline
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I am not argue with you. If u fell that I cannot do anything to help you. I donot have to agree to what you have to say just becoz you said it and "think" know more. After if I go on trial I promise I will come back to tell my success story.

From ur response I would think I spell appaulled wrong . I deal with so many people that make fun of my English and I saw u were also one of them. I have my opinion and you have your. Let us agree to disagree
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  #28  
Old 11-24-2013, 11:36 AM
firhill firhill is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by yahoo View Post
mess, My ex who is disable used to call me these names:
Retard, f$&k face, dumb, idiot, crazy a$$, b$&&ch, moron, c$&t, piece of $hit, crap, poopy, ignorant, stupid etc and the list is very long. U quoted:

"such as "retarded," "dumb," "psycho," "moron" or "crippled." These words are very demeaning and disrespectful to people with disabilities. "

What about people who are not ? And instead are the only pirson taking care of the "disable" who speak such words to me? What do law say about that?
I hate it when someone calls me poopy.
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  #29  
Old 11-24-2013, 11:59 AM
yahoo yahoo is offline
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It was a normal routine for me. After counseling I found how badly I was abuaed. I never thawt this words were not good for me.
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  #30  
Old 11-24-2013, 12:03 PM
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arabian arabian is offline
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I've found that disparaging words = small dick syndrome. This is synonymous with the Blame Game and other matrimonial activities that occur during separation/divorce.
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