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2 years to agree......15 days to default

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  • #16
    The reality is, there is nothing you can sue him for. You have no cause of action.

    You each were represented by legal counsel and negotiated an agreement. He leveraged you with fighting for shared custody in order for you to waive arrears. It was simply a matter of negotiation. If you feel like you got the short end of the stick, maybe you had bad legal advise.

    But ultimately, not living up to the terms of a custody agreement will not create damages that can be remedied through small claims court. And there is definitely no cause of action now that can cause you to go after legal fees associated with a negotiated agreement.

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    • #17
      Honestly, if he is treating your daughter as you suggest, why on earth would you even want him to take her..If he has decided not to take her, all the better to some degree for both your daughter and yourself. Deal with FRO for support and if he does not want a relationship with your daughter, I wouldn't force it and seems your daughter is pretty content staying away from his current spouse anyways. LEAVE IT ALONE!! to much negativity and energy spent on him. Apparently he is thriving on it..

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      • #18
        Essentially then.....

        any custody agreement/separation agreement is completely worthless if anyone involved decides that they don't want to "agree" any longer.... extremely disheartening. No wonder family lawyers are living high on the hog making thousands and thousands per case!! They're hired to keep doing the same thing over and over again because there's absolutely no recourse .....

        I always looked at the agreement as a contract of sorts....I said I'd do XYZ and therefore I'm obligated to do XYZ and can't just do ABC because that's what suits me today.

        Well, it sounds like the perfect system for liars, cheaters and thiefs..... Is it any wonder there's millions outstanding in support to the custodial parents out there. Those that don't want to pay or parent don't really have to no matter what promises and agreements they make.

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        • #19
          Originally posted by sassie77 View Post
          Honestly, if he is treating your daughter as you suggest, why on earth would you even want him to take her..If he has decided not to take her, all the better to some degree for both your daughter and yourself. Deal with FRO for support and if he does not want a relationship with your daughter, I wouldn't force it and seems your daughter is pretty content staying away from his current spouse anyways. LEAVE IT ALONE!! to much negativity and energy spent on him. Apparently he is thriving on it..

          I don't want him to take her. I'm not trying to get him to do what he said, I'm trying to implement a consequence because he's not doing what he fought so hard to do. It cost me thousands and thousands to demonstrate to the court that he had no intention of doing what he said he would .... and guess what, I was right!! But, despite that, I'm in the hole $13G, struggling to get regular support payments and am still the only one who has any responsibilities at all.....

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          • #20
            Originally posted by ONTMOMMA View Post
            any custody agreement/separation agreement is completely worthless if anyone involved decides that they don't want to "agree" any longer.... extremely disheartening. No wonder family lawyers are living high on the hog making thousands and thousands per case!! They're hired to keep doing the same thing over and over again because there's absolutely no recourse .....

            I always looked at the agreement as a contract of sorts....I said I'd do XYZ and therefore I'm obligated to do XYZ and can't just do ABC because that's what suits me today.

            Well, it sounds like the perfect system for liars, cheaters and thiefs..... Is it any wonder there's millions outstanding in support to the custodial parents out there. Those that don't want to pay or parent don't really have to no matter what promises and agreements they make.
            The courts can't force a person to be a good parent.

            And you'll be banging your head against the wall trying to make your ex be a better parent. To be honest, they will likely do the exact opposite of what you say simply to spite you.

            The best and only thing you can do is be there for your kid. Gently encourage your ex and the children to spend time together. But outside of that, it is simply out of your control and more accurately, none of your business. I know it sucks to see your kids hurting. But it is the person responsible for the hurt that will eventually have to answer for their actions. In the mean time, just pick up the pieces and be there for your kid.

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            • #21
              Originally posted by ONTMOMMA View Post
              struggling to get regular support payments and am still the only one who has any responsibilities at all.....
              As mentioned, register your agreement with FRO. Why should you stress yourself over this sort of stuff when there are organizations out there that can take care of this for you.....for free....

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              • #22
                I know the family law system is a joke and your right if us as woman refused to send the child we are breaching the Order and could be held in contempt, however he does not want to see the child that he fought so hard for and now he doesn't bother. Very frustrating. It seem's that he may have some anger and resentment towards you and taking it out on your daughter. Which is disgusting as most men are fighting for time with their kids. There is no recourse as our system is extremely flawed.
                Just attempt to get your daughters Support through FRO and leave him alone as it is going to effect your mental state, and your relationships go forward.
                He's a deadbeat...When woman decide to have children our lives change and some men just carry on as they always have. Some men are great fathers and the woman won't allow them to be. All around it's wrong and sad, but for your sake leave it be, make sure you keep an email trail because in a year when he wants to see his daughter, he could accuse you of keeping her away. Can you tell I have dealt with this insanity

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                • #23
                  Well, FRO is just one more system he can manipulate......

                  And, FRO doesn't really take care of anything at all..... at least they haven't yet. So far they've been able to leave voicemails for me on answering machines that don't exist, lose all the paperwork I've submitted - twice - and ignore my messages and voicemails.

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                  • #24
                    You're right....its all a meaningless, cruel joke. It is all his loss in the end....he's missing out on one incredibly intelligent, beautiful girl. I only wish I were aware of how much a joke this whole thing is before I spent a fortune on it...that money would have been much better spent on a Deluxe Disney Vacation !

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