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  • Filing a Notice of Motion/Motion to Change

    Hi all - I came to the website a little under a year ago with questions about RESP/Child Support - thread here - https://www.ottawadivorce.com/forum/...ad.php?t=22024

    Well I am back again, having been handed a First notice to suspend my drivers licence. My ex had filed with FRO because I stopped paying her child support as my son had gone to college and was staying in residence on campus. She had used money from our sons RESP account to pay all of his schooling expenses, including residence, and wanted me to still pay full table child support along with half of the schooling expenses out of my pocket even though I contributed to the RESP account for the last 14 years.

    So I ended agreeing to pay FRO for child support (the amount was from our original separation agreement 15 years ago) but did not agree to pay for the schooling expenses.

    I'm sorry but that just seems very unreasonable to me considering most of the funds in the RESP came from my contributions. Even though the fund is in her name only I believe that the RESP should be shared equally between my ex and I.

    So now I am going to the family court on Wednesday to file a notice of motion for a refraining order to keep FRO from suspending my licence.

    Does anyone have any advice on what to put on the notice of motion and the affidavit ?

    From what I understand the notice of motion would just be me asking the judge to order that the FRO be refrained from suspending my licence and then the affidavit would list the reasons why i believe he/she should grant the order ?

    I will then be attending an information session at the courthouse on how to fill out a motion to change next week so that should help for that.

    I am trying to do this without a lawyer as I have already paid one $2000 and used that up through out the year and havent really got anywhere with her.

    Any help that anyone can provide would be greatly appreciated !!

    Edit - sorry do you need to fill out and bring a financial statement when filing the notice of motion ?

  • #2
    You will need to do a motion to change to change the amount of cs. If he is living in residence for eight months then cs is lowered or stopped depending on the situation. You do still need to pay a portion of expenses depending on what is left. He is required to contribute too though. Has she provided any proof of his expenses? You should outline that he was living away from home and you were paying full table cs.

    You would need to be in significant arrears to have your license suspended. Why did you not pay the money and file then? Have you spoken to your caseworker at FRO?

    Comment


    • #3
      Thanks for the reply rockscan - I remember you helping me when i last posted here and it is muchly appreciated !

      The amount in arrears is about $7500 which is half of my sons schooling expenses from last year which was his first year of post secondary. And yes she has given receipts for all of the expenses.

      So are you saying i should have paid that money first even though i do not agree that i should be paying it ?

      Would I get be able to get reimbursed if the judge sides with my point of view ?

      The amount of money in the RESP is enough to cover roughly his first 3 years of school so really I should not have to pay anything until maybe the third year when the funds are used up.

      Comment


      • #4
        Did your agreement lay out an amount you had to pay? For instance “Father will pay $3000 per year for post secondary expenses”? If yes, that allows FRO to recover it. If no, it simply says “Father will pay his proportionate share of expenses when receipts provided”, FRO should not have allowed it. I would call your case worker and also start a dispute on those expenses.

        Yes you should have paid and also filed the motion then. For anyone stumbling across this post in the future, if you have an order with an enforcement agency, you CANNOT STOP PAYING AND THINK IT WILL GO AWAY. You must start a court action if your ex is being unreasonable.

        First step is to contact FRO and see what you can do to dispute the expenses and how you can stop the action against you.

        Second step is to file your paperwork.

        You will need to calculate everything you have with respect to cs and his school expenses. Just because you have an RESP doesnt mean you don’t have to pay. Technically the cs you paid for him should have gone towards his residence expenses. That should be in the calculations.

        Your affidavit should outline the cs costs for each individual kid, the school expenses and what you paid in cs.

        You should have taken action immediately last year when she refused to work with you. You may need to pay down some of the arrears to protect your license. A judge will ask why you took so long.

        Again, to anyone reading this going forward, never expect your ex to be reasonable. As long as you are with a collections organization, they can manipulate it to their benefit. Always move quickly to update numbers as the courts take months.

        Comment


        • #5
          Originally posted by imadad View Post
          I stopped paying her child support as my son had gone to college and was staying in residence on campus.
          That's where you went wrong. You don't get to decide when to pay or not pay child support. You go to court and get that changed. Until then, you owe the support.


          She had used money from our sons RESP account to pay all of his schooling expenses, including residence, and wanted me to still pay full table child support along with half of the schooling expenses out of my pocket even though I contributed to the RESP account for the last 14 years.
          Did you child support order end? If not, then you owed her child support.

          I'm sorry but that just seems very unreasonable to me considering most of the funds in the RESP came from my contributions. Even though the fund is in her name only I believe that the RESP should be shared equally between my ex and I.
          Sounds like a position for the court case that you should have started but did not.


          So now I am going to the family court on Wednesday to file a notice of motion for a refraining order to keep FRO from suspending my licence.
          You said later that you are only $7500 in arrears. What is your monthly support payment?

          Edit - sorry do you need to fill out and bring a financial statement when filing the notice of motion ?
          Generally a good plan to bring a financial statement, you can't go wrong.

          Comment


          • #6
            Originally posted by rockscan View Post
            Did your agreement lay out an amount you had to pay? For instance “Father will pay $3000 per year for post secondary expenses”? If yes, that allows FRO to recover it. If no, it simply says “Father will pay his proportionate share of expenses when receipts provided”, FRO should not have allowed it. I would call your case worker and also start a dispute on those expenses.

            Yes you should have paid and also filed the motion then. For anyone stumbling across this post in the future, if you have an order with an enforcement agency, you CANNOT STOP PAYING AND THINK IT WILL GO AWAY. You must start a court action if your ex is being unreasonable.

            First step is to contact FRO and see what you can do to dispute the expenses and how you can stop the action against you.

            Second step is to file your paperwork.

            You will need to calculate everything you have with respect to cs and his school expenses. Just because you have an RESP doesnt mean you don’t have to pay. Technically the cs you paid for him should have gone towards his residence expenses. That should be in the calculations.

            Your affidavit should outline the cs costs for each individual kid, the school expenses and what you paid in cs.

            You should have taken action immediately last year when she refused to work with you. You may need to pay down some of the arrears to protect your license. A judge will ask why you took so long.

            Again, to anyone reading this going forward, never expect your ex to be reasonable. As long as you are with a collections organization, they can manipulate it to their benefit. Always move quickly to update numbers as the courts take months.
            i believe the agreement states that the father will pay half of the post secondary expenses.

            At first FRO only came to me regarding the outstanding support payments so i didnt think they would be coming after me for the post secondary but then they started asking for it.

            And to be clear, I stopped paying CS and didnt pay anything for school on the advice from my lawyer. Everything I have done so far has been on the advice of my lawyer so i dont think i have done anything wrong. Unless of course my lawyer is wacked !

            I was advised not to pay and to try and work something out my ex but that never panned out.

            Also i was never advised to file any motions even when i first started receiving noticed from FRO.

            it was only when i received the notice to suspend my licence that my lawyer advised to file the motion to change which i am am going to do once I get the refraining order against FRO so my licence doesnt get suspended.

            Comment


            • #7
              Originally posted by Janus View Post
              That's where you went wrong. You don't get to decide when to pay or not pay child support. You go to court and get that changed. Until then, you owe the support.




              Did you child support order end? If not, then you owed her child support.



              Sounds like a position for the court case that you should have started but did not.




              You said later that you are only $7500 in arrears. What is your monthly support payment?



              Generally a good plan to bring a financial statement, you can't go wrong.
              thanks for the replies - i just mentioned this in another post but everything i have done so far has been on the advice from my lawyer.

              The monthly support payment is just under $300/month but the $7500 in arrears is for post secondary expenses only. I have been paying CS to FRO since i received the notice from them.

              Comment


              • #8
                Your lawyer was right and wrong. Lawyers will say don’t pay but they aren’t the ones subject to enforcement.

                I would still reach out to FRO to see about disputing the amounts since technically they weren’t calculating them right.

                You do need the motion to change anyway because of your kids living situations. Get the motion moving and recalculate. You should also provide an offer to settle.

                Did she ever provide you with the other proof I suggested you ask for? oSAP grants, RESP amounts, her income info etc?

                Did you agreement state anything about cs if the kids lived away from home while at school? Did it say anything about grants and the resp etc?

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by rockscan View Post
                  Your lawyer was right and wrong. Lawyers will say don’t pay but they aren’t the ones subject to enforcement.

                  I would still reach out to FRO to see about disputing the amounts since technically they weren’t calculating them right.

                  You do need the motion to change anyway because of your kids living situations. Get the motion moving and recalculate. You should also provide an offer to settle.

                  Did she ever provide you with the other proof I suggested you ask for? oSAP grants, RESP amounts, her income info etc?

                  Did you agreement state anything about cs if the kids lived away from home while at school? Did it say anything about grants and the resp etc?
                  i actually did call FRO once and they basically just advised that i could dispute it all i want but it wouldnt make a difference. I definitely will be moving ahead with the motion to change.

                  No she never provided me with anything that i asked her for, she is completely closed off to working with me whatsoever. Im pretty sure she is trying to cause me as much pain and suffering as she can without willing to compromise.

                  i would have to look again at the exact wording but im pretty sure our agreement states that i still need to pay CS when he is attending school but doesnt specifically say anything about paying when he is STAYING st school.

                  I would assume, and my lawyer confirmed, that if he is staying at school then any CS payments would go towards residence costs and not to her directly.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Yes cs would normally stop while he is away from home. This was what my partners lawyer said too.

                    As for FRO and disputing it, did they send you a statement of arrears or anything? I would still call and speak to a supervisor about their calculation and attempt to dispute it. Yes you are going to court but they should have provided paperwork on it.

                    Im not going to sugar coat it, by not filing anything until now you dug this hole. Getting out of it won’t be pretty. At this point, you will need to demand full documentation from your ex on all the school costs to calculate it properly. You need to get in front of a judge. Regardless of what your lawyer said, it should have been done once your kids stopped living with her.

                    Check on what your agreement said as that will need to be shared with FRO as part of the dispute. As an example, my partners ex filed a statement of arrears for section 7 expenses. He got this document with the receipts attached. Their agreement said he would pay a proportionate share of the expenses—not dollar amount. He called his caseworker who told him he needed to file a formal letter of dispute. He sent a letter by fax with a copy of the sections of their agreement and outlined that a) the agreement did not specify an amount and b) the expenses were not s7. After a few months FRO withdrew the expenses.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by rockscan View Post
                      Yes cs would normally stop while he is away from home. This was what my partners lawyer said too.

                      As for FRO and disputing it, did they send you a statement of arrears or anything? I would still call and speak to a supervisor about their calculation and attempt to dispute it. Yes you are going to court but they should have provided paperwork on it.

                      Im not going to sugar coat it, by not filing anything until now you dug this hole. Getting out of it won’t be pretty. At this point, you will need to demand full documentation from your ex on all the school costs to calculate it properly. You need to get in front of a judge. Regardless of what your lawyer said, it should have been done once your kids stopped living with her.

                      Check on what your agreement said as that will need to be shared with FRO as part of the dispute. As an example, my partners ex filed a statement of arrears for section 7 expenses. He got this document with the receipts attached. Their agreement said he would pay a proportionate share of the expenses—not dollar amount. He called his caseworker who told him he needed to file a formal letter of dispute. He sent a letter by fax with a copy of the sections of their agreement and outlined that a) the agreement did not specify an amount and b) the expenses were not s7. After a few months FRO withdrew the expenses.
                      yes FRO sent me a statement of arrears along with the receipts that she sent them. I am not necessarily disputing the amounts but just that the RESP funds should have covered my portion as I contributed to the fund monthly for 14 years.

                      i am starting to get a little nervous now with what you are saying but Im pretty sure I have solid reasons for not paying. I guess its going to come down to what a judge thinks though unfortunately.

                      I mean if the judge denies my request then not only did she use RESP funds to pay for the whole cost of his year - she now wants me to give her half of those expenses out of my pocket which would go directly into hers. And on top of that - she would be getting full table support from me even though he didnt live with her and she didnt have any out of pocket expenses for the year since residence was covered by the RESP funds. And all from RESP funds that Im pretty sure were mostly, if not completely, funded by me.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Sitting and bitching about the unfairness will get you nowhere. She did what she did and you did what you did, now it needs to be fixed.

                        Even if you contributed to the RESP and paid CS, your agreement still said something to the effect of you will pay half the costs. Technically she is in the right to have filed the expenses and you were in the wrong for sticking your head in the sand. Time to man up and fix this problem.

                        Your argument back on school costs is this: your son went away to school, your son should have applied for OSAP to be eligible for grants, you paid into an RESP which was used for his expenses. Bottom line, she is double dipping.

                        In your motion to change you request cs to be updated for the other kids retroactive, cs to be terminated for your son for 8 months of the year (retroactive) and that school expenses be calculated as the net cost, grants and awards less the cs paid and a share of the RESP, with the remaining calculated proportionate to income. You also demand that she provide full details on said loans and grants as well as proof of what was withdrawn from the RESP.

                        A caveat though...she may argue that the RESP is kids portion of the expense, that the RESP is for all the kids or that it is her portion. Depending on what your agreement says, she may get away with this argument. This is where your proof comes in.

                        Your case is stupid and ugly and could have been fixed years ago. Lawyers really don’t know what to do with FRO and there should be a mechanism in place to update properly.

                        Roll up your sleeves because you have got some serious work to do.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          I was in a similar situation. File your motion to change right away and then talk to FRO to let them know what's happening. You'll have to follow up after each court appearance, but this should allow them to hold off on any enforcement actions. Explain your situation at the conference and you may be able to get a without prejudice suspension on that s7 expense until motion as regular support is still being paid.

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            So just wanted to update that I was granted my motion for a refraining order so my drivers licence isnt going to be suspended !

                            Not much but its a start so now its on to the next step which I was told was to fill out a General Application (Form 8) instead of a motion to change. Was told this is because I am working with a separation agreement rather than a support order and also because I am looking to change things other than just CS.

                            The duty counsel that I was talking to and who represented me in court seemed to think it is pretty ridiculous that my ex is trying to get me to pay for half of the school expenses while they were already paid by the RESP so that made me feel better about my case.

                            So now I just have to decide exactly what I am going to ask for in my application.

                            I have a question first though for someone who may know - there is a clause in my separation agreement that states that I have to pay support until one or more of a bunch things occur and one of those things listed is that my son reaches the age of 21.

                            So does that mean I can stop paying support once he reaches 21 even if he is still going to school full time ? And if that is the case does that also include not paying for anything else as well such as his schooling ?

                            Not saying I wont help out but if i can do it on my own terms and not on the terms of my ex then I will be a happy camper.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              No, she can respond she wants continued support until he is done school.

                              My husband has a similar clause but his lawyer said he will be ordered to pay cs until kids are finished school.

                              You have a change though. He is not living at home and if he stays at school the cs is not paid.

                              Comment

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