pick up and drop off times

[fireweb13]

Hello,
Just wondering if anyone has some advice for me.When I went to court 2 years ago we had the court order writed with a time for pick ups and drop offs based on my old job,now that i have a new job and have actually been working this job for 8 months without a problem my ex wants me to be there to pick up my daughter at the exact time in the court order and says that i can no longer call before i head out of the city,as she lives an hour and a half away from me.What we had been doing is i would call her the night before to give her an approximate time,then call if i was running late to let her know,and then as soon as i was in my car heading up would call again to let her know i was on my way there.this has been working for 8 months and now she wants me there at 330 or else i have to wait because she might be out because she can;t be left hanging even though i give her lots of notice.So i am wondering if this is an issue that i should bring back to court of if I am doing whats right and she is just going to have to suck it up.Thank you again

[#1StepMom]

I think what you've been doing is completely correct. Courts order an approximate time, based on your availability at the time of the court date. If you schedule has change, it should be up to you and the other party to set up a new schedule that will work. If she's unwilling to do so, sadly, you'd have to bring it back to court - especially if she begins withholding visitations.

We had similar situations ourselves, and luckily have managed to work things out amicably. We are currently only abiding by the pick-up time in our court order, and have changed the drop-off time to suit the child's bedtime better.

If I were you, I'd send her an email explaining exactly what you explained to us - how you've managed to work things out for the past 8 months, and request to know why - all of a sudden - she is no longer to able to follow the set-up that's been working all this time? Also, list some suggestions... maybe suggest a pick-up time that you know you will always be able to commit to, and if it's a significant decrease from the time you're court ordered to spend with your child, ask for an additional day to make up the difference.

But make sure that you have everything documented. If she is the one being unreasonable - as you say - then you will need to be able to prove that if you decide to take this to court.

Good luck to you!

[fireweb13]

Thank you,I shall write her that email today,and completly agree with you.Everything that goes back and forth from us is documented,i even keep in the odd rude remark that i make when i am frustrated so that it does not look edited.My problem with going to court is that our court order states that we must go to mediation first unless its an emergency,and since she is denying mediation i am not sure what the next step is.I don;t have a lawyer as i make just more then the legal aid guidline and we all know that it costs a fortune so i am making this on my own.