Ottawa Divorce .com Forums


User CP

New posts

Advertising

  Ottawa Divorce .com Forums > Main Category > Divorce & Family Law

Divorce & Family Law This forum is for discussing any of the legal issues involved in your divorce.

Closed Thread
 
Thread Tools
  #1  
Old 05-13-2011, 10:42 AM
Pinto Pinto is offline
Junior Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Posts: 14
Pinto is on a distinguished road
Default Friend visit in matrimonial home

Hello everyone, I am looking for a second, third, fourth opinion on this thing:
Separated over 1 year, still living in the matrimonial home because of the two children. STBX extremely upset and revengeful because i filed for divorce and all the fun stuff with the court a couple of weeks ago.

We have tried negotiating everything for months but turned around in circles because what we agreed on one day was un-agreed the next day by her.
She was supposed to purchase my interest in the home last week but changed the amount at the last moment. That would have been ok but she also wanted to change the access schedule, therefore I would go under the 40% for both children instead of only the youngest (almost 2 years old). In preparation for what I thought was my final move I rented another place and got some new furniture for the kids room, etc.
Since I had the new place I started sleeping overnights there for 2 weeks. She changed the locks on the doors to the matrimonial home as advised by her new lawyer. I rang the doorbell, she let me in, I changed the locks back and have been there this past week again and will stay there until this is over.

She told me a couple of months ago that a friend of hers would be coming from Europe for a visit in May. I had no problems with this because the home should had been hers in May. My stbx just told me that the friend arrives next Monday and would stay for 2.5 weeks. I honestly don't want her in my home. I don't know this person and don't want the added stress of yet another pair of eyes scrutinizing what and when and where i do with my kids. Can I legally ask my stbx to ask the friend stay in a hotel? Does this do anything to my reasonableness in front of a judge when we get there in June for the case conference? Should I allow her to stay but charge rent, and how much (mortgage $2000 per month)? What do you think?

Thanks,
pinto
  #2  
Old 05-13-2011, 11:06 AM
HammerDad HammerDad is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Hamilton
Posts: 3,776
HammerDad will become famous soon enough
Default

She is allowed to have visitors/company/guests. While you still own a portion of the house, you cannot dictate who she has in as her guest or for how long.

Trying to do so will make you looking like a controlling uncooperative prick.

I know you may not like, but look at the bright side. She may want to take off evenings with her friend and leave you alone with the kids.
  #3  
Old 05-13-2011, 11:19 AM
billm's Avatar
billm billm is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 2,431
billm is on a distinguished road
Default

Just ignore the visit but be friendly.

Otherwise you seem controlling etc - it is equally her house and not your business. Don't even think of trying to charge rent - that is ridiculous.

You ended the marriage, so she is not as ready as you, having a friend around will be good for her and hopefully for you too.

Good for you to get back in the house - that was a close one!
  #4  
Old 05-13-2011, 11:29 AM
Pinto Pinto is offline
Junior Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Posts: 14
Pinto is on a distinguished road
Default

Thank you! I just love consulting with the cool heads on this forum. Your calming effect is priceless.
I will be friendly and enjoy all the extra time with the kids.
pinto
  #5  
Old 05-13-2011, 12:24 PM
AtALoss AtALoss is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 560
AtALoss is on a distinguished road
Default

Speaking in generalities, Another point to raise in being tolerable of an ex having "visitors" if she moves on into another relationship that she would move in or marry there goes the spousal portion. So if you cant see a reasonable objection just go with it.
  #6  
Old 05-13-2011, 01:16 PM
Mominneed's Avatar
Mominneed Mominneed is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Ontario
Posts: 137
Mominneed is on a distinguished road
Default

I don't believe that spousal support goes away if your x moves in with someone else or remarries. Could be wrong but I don't believe that has anything to do with it.
  #7  
Old 05-13-2011, 01:26 PM
paris paris is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2007
Posts: 567
paris is on a distinguished road
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pinto View Post
Thank you! I just love consulting with the cool heads on this forum. Your calming effect is priceless.
I will be friendly and enjoy all the extra time with the kids.
pinto
Good for you for being flexible. If your STBX and her friend aren't as interested in being as flexible and friendly, you could always offer them the apartment for the visit.

  #8  
Old 05-13-2011, 01:38 PM
billm's Avatar
billm billm is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 2,431
billm is on a distinguished road
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mominneed View Post
I don't believe that spousal support goes away if your x moves in with someone else or remarries. Could be wrong but I don't believe that has anything to do with it.
It depends on the SS agreement - for the most part SS goes away if they remarry.

My SS is based on what happened during the marriage (ie it is based on compensation for her career damage, and our normal incomes), so marriage, job loss, income changes etc do not effect my SS payments, which I like.

However if SS is needs based, then a change in circumstances such as living with someone else, would definitely effect SS.
Closed Thread


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Matrimonial Home question again.... rcooper Financial Issues 29 10-06-2011 12:54 AM
Matrimonial Home, Residency and Residential rights zoltar Divorce & Family Law 1 08-20-2011 01:04 PM
Home Ownership Matrimonial Home? epinecone Financial Issues 11 11-08-2010 10:28 PM
Help - Matrimonial Home completeshock Financial Issues 4 01-15-2008 10:15 AM
Return to Matrimonial Home? Dante_66 Divorce & Family Law 5 06-02-2006 12:18 AM


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 09:37 PM.