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how to cope with ex missus

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  • how to cope with ex missus

    My husband fooled arond wth one woman - we talked he promised to end it and we promised each other to put it behind us and move forward with a clean slate. Thre weeks went by when I found out that he was not only talking to her but had started an email relationship with his ex from 16 years ago - a woman who fooled arond on him 4-5 times. She wants out of a relationship shes in and is looking to the good old sucker from the past to get her out - and he's falling for it hook line and sinker.
    Problem for me is, if he takes her back, its likely they will move here to my own small rural community. How the hell do I cope with seeing her, her kids and him together and worse, when he has visitation, it turns my stomach to think that my son will spend time with such a person.

  • #2
    Sorry to read about your situation, but irregardless of that, you don't really have a choice when it comes to who your ex (or soon to be) dates. My ex is with a female who is not only 17 years his junior, but she is also the same female who was charged and sentenced to assault with a weapon on my then 8 yr old son for beating him with a hard plastic extension tube for a vacuum cleaner.

    While you may not want to have to see her and him together, you will simply have to learn how to cope. But frankly as long as she is good to your son, then being able to have not only both his parents in his life, but the possibility of an 'extended' family who cares for him would be a benefit in the end.

    Best of luck

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    • #3
      So how do I learn how to cope? Is this something that time will heal?

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      • #4
        Originally posted by tcl18 View Post
        So how do I learn how to cope? Is this something that time will heal?
        time heals all wounds. MY ex husbands first wife was real nasty to me at the start but when she got remarried (lost her husband less then a year later in a tragic accident) she even went as far to allow me into her home while he saw his kids. This is the same woman who would bitch because I would drop him off to see the kids.

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        • #5
          Sorry to hear about your struggles with this.I am going through my own with no children so I can't understand that part but do understand the pain of seing an ex you still love with another.

          My ex has been seeing another man who basically knew me and scooped her up in her vulnerability and time of need and despair.I have accepted it but I won't lie and say it doesn't hurt me everyday to even think about it.

          My only advice since there is children involved would be to put your hurt or anger aside at least in front of the children for their sake and try as hard as you can do deal with it at a later moment when they are not around to experience it.As much as you may be hurt,angry , frustrated or even just hatefull unless their father was a truly bad man to them they don't need to be subjected to your vision of him even if it is justified and deserved.If their father is still a hero in their eyes don't ruin that for them.

          When you have a monent to yourself call a friend, a parent or someone you trust to vent and listen. I would be knowhere without having the shoulders I had to cry on and still rely on them regularly for support!

          I just joined this forum as I am seeking some help, talk and advice for my own dealings but hope I can help other going through similar situations along the way.

          Keep your chin up, hard advice to give considering mine is down at the moment but I do believe we will all come out of this on top be it alone, with another or even our ex's, who knows.Only time will tell

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