Let it go.
I was (am less so now) very bitter about the family law process.
It was quite an eye opener to hear some of the horror stories on this board. The pain, frustaration, anger, and sorrow, to mention a few emotions, was hard to read at times.
It is a nightmare for different reasons to different people in different circumstances.
For some it is paying for a cheating spouse, for another it is lack of time with their kids, and for someone else it is not having any money to raise the kids. For me, it was having my career and finances torn apart with no regards to actually need (50%-50% kids - completely financially covered) and still dragged through the system for every possible dollar becasue she could (by law).
As for this raging flame war, everyone needs to back off. Some posters are still too raw to be calm about the nightmare thay are just starting or are still stuck in (or still feeling the effects of). Others here are too cynical or hard-hearted after their own battle scars are hardly mended.
Good advice with a strong dose of reality is good medicine, but the patient maynot be able to take it right away. Denial, shock, anger, and disbelief of their circumstances may not allow the reality of the situation (fair or unfair) to sink in.
Jokes or insult humour may not sit well to someone who life is falling apart or is torn apart. The last thing that person may want to hear is "Suck it up, Muffin". A little more compassion, especially by those who have braved the tenches, might not go a mis.
Newcomers, who have just as much of a right to be here and to have their own opinions, are always going to be more upset, angry, and lost than those who have been here 2-3 years.
The oldtimers have read it all, seen it all and lived it all. Remember please, that the new guys and gals are new to it.
Plus the insulting stuff in this thread reminds me of the crap my ex-wife (and I to a certain extend) use to trade back and forth. Once the main idea or theme is stated, the rest is just a waste of time.
I was (am less so now) very bitter about the family law process.
It was quite an eye opener to hear some of the horror stories on this board. The pain, frustaration, anger, and sorrow, to mention a few emotions, was hard to read at times.
It is a nightmare for different reasons to different people in different circumstances.
For some it is paying for a cheating spouse, for another it is lack of time with their kids, and for someone else it is not having any money to raise the kids. For me, it was having my career and finances torn apart with no regards to actually need (50%-50% kids - completely financially covered) and still dragged through the system for every possible dollar becasue she could (by law).
As for this raging flame war, everyone needs to back off. Some posters are still too raw to be calm about the nightmare thay are just starting or are still stuck in (or still feeling the effects of). Others here are too cynical or hard-hearted after their own battle scars are hardly mended.
Good advice with a strong dose of reality is good medicine, but the patient maynot be able to take it right away. Denial, shock, anger, and disbelief of their circumstances may not allow the reality of the situation (fair or unfair) to sink in.
Jokes or insult humour may not sit well to someone who life is falling apart or is torn apart. The last thing that person may want to hear is "Suck it up, Muffin". A little more compassion, especially by those who have braved the tenches, might not go a mis.
Newcomers, who have just as much of a right to be here and to have their own opinions, are always going to be more upset, angry, and lost than those who have been here 2-3 years.
The oldtimers have read it all, seen it all and lived it all. Remember please, that the new guys and gals are new to it.
Plus the insulting stuff in this thread reminds me of the crap my ex-wife (and I to a certain extend) use to trade back and forth. Once the main idea or theme is stated, the rest is just a waste of time.
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